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Thread: The ENTP shrug?

  1. #61
    half mystic, half skeksis jenocyde's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ne-Monster View Post

    And the part you seem to keep missing-likely becuase you are not really reading the posts in your self centric appraisal of the issue-is that he THANKS ME FOR MY ADVICE.
    I tried to help you, I really did. I can't begin to describe how this post reeks of judgment. What does his sex life have to do with his job performance? Why is it even your business? For every relevant point, there are 2 more that just seem inherently personal... like you have a vendetta buried in there somewhere.

    If he's that much of an asshole, fire him. There are plenty of bright people in this world.

  2. #62
    The High Priestess Amargith's Avatar
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    I think it was more an example of the attitude he brings to work with him, really. It is one of the things used to illustrates his lack of respect, which he presumably doesn't leave at home. And then it does become a work-issue, especially if you're part of a team.
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  3. #63
    resonance entropie's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Amargith View Post
    I think it was more an example of the attitude he brings to work with him, really. It is one of the things used to illustrates his lack of respect, which he presumably doesn't leave at home. And then it does become a work-issue, especially if you're part of a team.
    Those are things that are discussable. But Ne-monsters analysis is highly subjective and that way you wont get a NT
    [URL]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tEBvftJUwDw&t=0s[/URL]

  4. #64
    half mystic, half skeksis jenocyde's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Amargith View Post
    I think it was more an example of the attitude he brings to work with him, really. It is one of the things used to illustrates his lack of respect, which he presumably doesn't leave at home. And then it does become a work-issue, especially if you're part of a team.

    This is what I don't understand. Everyone brings their personality to work. I hate most people that I work with, but I do my job all the same.

    Some of the things are unacceptable - the temper tantrums, the demeaning customers - but the rest really has no bearing, in my opinion.

    And him thanking her for the advice seems like a play to manipulate her and get her to fight his battles for him. Sending the good cop in on your behalf... Watch your back, Monster. He doesn't seem genuine.

  5. #65
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    something someone said that might look good here
    i think you are missing something. dont know what, but something.

    what kind of relationship do you have with this man? describe it

    for the stuff he says, you reallly have to know his motivations behind it... called his long term girlfriend of seven years "the woman who lives in my house"...i could see myself saying that. hell i'd prolly say that in front of her. but it doesn't mean anything...just a joke


    THANKS ME FOR MY ADVICE.
    you better be sure 110% sure that he is sincere. once your sure, check again

    -can you fire him? he just might be playing it nice with you
    -does not want anything to do with you except the bare minimum
    -this could also be an example of what your ENTP girl said:
    Oddly my best friend entp says when Fe kicks in she feels torn-she wants to be terse, bitter and cruel, but instead gets calmer and calmer and calmer, nicer and nicer on the surface. All the turmoil can't surface externally-mentally it is like Fe just will not let it out?? Her words not mine, so please forgive if it is inaccurate.
    Last edited by thisGuy; 08-25-2009 at 08:48 AM.

  6. #66
    The High Priestess Amargith's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by jenocyde View Post
    This is what I don't understand. Everyone brings their personality to work. I hate most people that I work with, but I do my job all the same.

    Some of the things are unacceptable - the temper tantrums, the demeaning customers - but the rest really has no bearing, in my opinion.

    And him thanking her for the advice seems like a play to manipulate her and get her to fight his battles for him. Sending the good cop in on your behalf... Watch your back, Monster. He doesn't seem genuine.
    Well, in this case I agree with her because of the situation. Far be it from me to force Fe down everyone's throat, but it seems that the situation has gotten to a level where if he wants his coworkers to actually appreciate his ideas and not sabotage him, he'll have to actually act cordially himself or he faces his ideas getting stuck, people not being willing to pick up his slack and clean up after him etc. That means the company suffers, but so does he, I'm guessing, as I'm sure he does wanna do his job well. Unfortunately, his job does include team-work, and although it might not be his fav part of it, it's something he cannot expect someone else to constantly micromanage for him...which it sounds Ne-monster is actually doing.

    In this case, him putting up a facade (sincere or not sincere) will get him what he wants and benefit the company. Surely an NT can appreciate the efficiency that comes from doing small gestures that get the work done more smoothly and gets his ideas appreciated, even if this costs a tremendous amount of effort.


    Ne-monster, I do agree however that he might be just trying to smooth talk you, though you did say he does implement some of the things you've said, and it would appear that he sees you as the only friend he has left there, so he might not be willing to blow up that bridge. I agree on not pushing him too often too far though as that's bound to blow up in your face then. Pace yourself...carefully. In general, people will react more willing when not being pressured, and I'd say that's doubly true for Ne-doms, and especially ENTPs, it would appear
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  7. #67
    Senior Member sculpting's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by jenocyde View Post
    I tried to help you, I really did. I can't begin to describe how this post reeks of judgment. What does his sex life have to do with his job performance? Why is it even your business? For every relevant point, there are 2 more that just seem inherently personal... like you have a vendetta buried in there somewhere.

    If he's that much of an asshole, fire him. There are plenty of bright people in this world.
    It should have no relevence. It shouldnt be an issue. What he does offsite, no one cares about. We have several sales guys who likely spend thier free time doing other stuff. We dont hear about it. They dont bring it back to the job.

    But in the past he has tangled this into his daily routine-it effects his ability to contribute. When I go to talk to someone about his project and the first thing they ask is "who is he fucking now?" or "why is he always hitting on me?" that is a problem. I cannot change the SJs in the world who are offended by this. I cant change that they make up about 55% of my company. For the SJs the lack of intergrity in personal life can lead to the assumption of a lack of intergrity in work life. Think of Bill clinton. This is not me-it is the world we live in.

    About four months back I told him this. I said it would help if, regardless of what you do on your personal time, you dont hit on chicks at work. He got into a nasty scrape with HR and another entp girl over hitting on her. He has stopped.

    After he hit on me I explained that I felt it was unethical to cheat on your girlfriend and maybe he should consider either not being in a committed relationship or being in an open relationship if you want to see other girls. Now this is totally private, totally intrusive, and totally judgemental on my part but he did hit on me, so I felt it was okay to let him know my thoughts on the issue. I did not mention it again. He calls his girlfriend his wife now when he is with work collegues. He stopped hitting on girls and bragging about how he can get awat with cheating.

    Again it doesnt matter what he does when on his own time.

    you are right about the firing. Many folks have brought this up. He does have some unique background traits that make him useful-specifically the combination of development experience and understanding of industry needs. If we lose him it would be a bit difficult to replace him given the area we are in-that is why he is still with us.

  8. #68
    resonance entropie's Avatar
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    It's always the same, everywhere you look.

    All dorks and dickheads happen to be geniuses.

    See me for reference
    [URL]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tEBvftJUwDw&t=0s[/URL]

  9. #69
    Senior Member tinkerbell's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by entropie View Post
    It's always the same, everywhere you look.

    All dorks and dickheads happen to be geniuses.

    See me for reference
    LOL and y'a just keep humouring those who are tickin you off


  10. #70
    half mystic, half skeksis jenocyde's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Amargith View Post
    , but so does he, I'm guessing, as I'm sure he does wanna do his job well.
    probably not, at this point.
    In this case, him putting up a facade (sincere or not sincere) will get him what he wants and benefit the company. Surely an NT can appreciate the efficiency that comes from doing small gestures that get the work done more smoothly and gets his ideas appreciated, even if this costs a tremendous amount of effort.
    so fine, he does the gestures and everyone can sit back and smugly pat themselves on the back on how they changed him. And like Monster said, he could be the director by the end of the year, and then god help them all.

    Quote Originally Posted by Ne-Monster View Post
    He calls his girlfriend his wife now when he is with work collegues. He stopped hitting on girls and bragging about how he can get awat with cheating.

    ...

    you are right about the firing. Many folks have brought this up. He does have some unique background traits that make him useful-specifically the combination of development experience and understanding of industry needs. If we lose him it would be a bit difficult to replace him given the area we are in-that is why he is still with us.
    Please. No one is irreplaceable.

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