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  1. #71
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    Quote Originally Posted by Maverick View Post
    NT's don't tend to have as many feelings for most people they meet than non-NT's. This makes some people uneasy. If they are insecure, they mistake it for rejection.

    Discuss.
    Here's a theory.
    Each trait specifies some form of connection.
    F and S are "motivation" traits, and specify forms of direct connection between people.
    N and T are "analysis" traits, and specify forms of indirect connection between things that affect people.

    Thus as NT's our area of confidence (primary and auxiliary) is analysis. Our area of need (tertiary and inferior) is motivation. SF types are presented with the opposite situation: their area of confidence is motivation, and their area of need is analysis.

    NF and ST types emphasize a different set of commonalities between traits.
    Each trait specifies a form of power.
    T and S are "concrete" traits, and specify how much power you have to directly alter real-world situations.
    F and N are "abstract" traits, and specify how much power you have to alter the subtle dynamics of situations.

    Basically, ST and NF types will find it strange that you are not focused on power, either in it's concrete or abstract forms. SF types will find it strange (and perhaps intimidating) that you are so focused on indirect connections and do not notice the more direct ones.

  2. #72
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    By good fortune, my family is interesting and our conversation is often challenging. Same for people I call friends. Other than that, don't bother me. As a woman apparently I am supposed to care about social issues, well I don't. Life is simple: go to work, obey the law, pay your bills, and look for a better way to do it.

  3. #73
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    Quote Originally Posted by Maverick View Post
    NT's don't tend to have as many feelings for most people they meet than non-NT's. This makes some people uneasy. If they are insecure, they mistake it for rejection.

    Discuss.
    In my experience, I think NTs have the strongest, most powerful emotions. Their emotions lie deep within the surface level of feeling- and I think certain events affect them on a deep level but possess great filtering perceptions so do not get bothered by "trivialities" which tends to irritate NFs.

    By trivialities, I mean- superficial interactions- little things that I think a lot of Feelers see as "slights" and write long rants about, do not really concern the NT- mindset. NTs, however, when they are angry or mad, wow! I don't want to be there! I tend to stay out of their path- and let it calm down after awhile.

    When Feelers get angry, I think they're cute. They let it out, and then want a big hug afterwards and just sort of melt when they think their feelings are understood and accepted. For Feelers, I find that they want their emotional states to be validated- if they are complaining or whingeing about their lives/work/people, they don't want an NT to come and logically assess their situation- they simply want someone to say "You're right- That's terrible!" Whereas, I think when Feelers try to overly emote to NTs during their bad moments- NTs feel as if they are being condescended towards- they just want the straightforward approach- to say "hey, you sort of acted out of line there, Matt, it caused this-and-this reaction- and I suggest you do this-and-this" as opposed to the Feeler approach "It's OK to be angry, I feel your pain" etc. I think this is why Feelers tend to feel "rejected" by NTs when they don't emote the way they emote to others. It is not a rejection at all, but simply how NTs like to assess interaction.

    As I mentioned before, NTs I think have a depth of emotion that is similar to STs (shameless self-promotion here )

    Feelers however often mistake "politeness" as a sign of internal values that reflect friendship and caring- when NTs view "politeness" as a typical way of interaction with others. It's very similar to when a random lady smiles at you on the street- "Is she flirting or being polite?"

    The answer is: if she is not an NT- she IS probably flirting. However, if she is an NT- then most likely, she is being her usual cheery self.

  4. #74
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    Quote Originally Posted by hotmale View Post
    In my experience, I think NTs have the strongest, most powerful emotions. Their emotions lie deep within the surface level of feeling- and I think certain events affect them on a deep level but possess great filtering perceptions so do not get bothered by "trivialities" which tends to irritate NFs.

    By trivialities, I mean- superficial interactions- little things that I think a lot of Feelers see as "slights" and write long rants about, do not really concern the NT- mindset. NTs, however, when they are angry or mad, wow! I don't want to be there! I tend to stay out of their path- and let it calm down after awhile.

    When Feelers get angry, I think they're cute. They let it out, and then want a big hug afterwards and just sort of melt when they think their feelings are understood and accepted. For Feelers, I find that they want their emotional states to be validated- if they are complaining or whingeing about their lives/work/people, they don't want an NT to come and logically assess their situation- they simply want someone to say "You're right- That's terrible!" Whereas, I think when Feelers try to overly emote to NTs during their bad moments- NTs feel as if they are being condescended towards- they just want the straightforward approach- to say "hey, you sort of acted out of line there, Matt, it caused this-and-this reaction- and I suggest you do this-and-this" as opposed to the Feeler approach "It's OK to be angry, I feel your pain" etc. I think this is why Feelers tend to feel "rejected" by NTs when they don't emote the way they emote to others. It is not a rejection at all, but simply how NTs like to assess interaction.

    As I mentioned before, NTs I think have a depth of emotion that is similar to STs (shameless self-promotion here )

    Feelers however often mistake "politeness" as a sign of internal values that reflect friendship and caring- when NTs view "politeness" as a typical way of interaction with others. It's very similar to when a random lady smiles at you on the street- "Is she flirting or being polite?"

    The answer is: if she is not an NT- she IS probably flirting. However, if she is an NT- then most likely, she is being her usual cheery self.
    I completely agree with this.

    T's don't pay as much attention to their emotions and those of others and tend to discard them more easily in decision making. I think that, because of this, they tend to have fewer coping strategies for dealing with them. When an emotion arises to their consciousness, it is probably because it is sufficiently strong as to "pass" the mental filters they set themselves. Combined with a lack of effective coping mechanism, the perceived intensity of the emotion may be higher.

  5. #75
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    Quote Originally Posted by hotmale View Post

    Feelers however often mistake "politeness" as a sign of internal values that reflect friendship and caring- when NTs view "politeness" as a typical way of interaction with others. It's very similar to when a random lady smiles at you on the street- "Is she flirting or being polite?"

    The answer is: if she is not an NT- she IS probably flirting. However, if she is an NT- then most likely, she is being her usual cheery self.
    Umm, I have to totally disagree with this. Or at least amend this. Did you mean 'NF' and not 'NT'in that last sentence?

    A bunch of NF females have already mentioned this in another thread, but we really are just being polite when we smile at you and not necessarily expressing interest.

    And my NT female friends do NOT SMILE at strangers, especially at strange men. At least not that I've noticed.

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