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  1. #1
    Listening Oaky's Avatar
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    Default NTs Views on family values

    I'm interested in what the majority of NTs think about family values. I personally find them important but not to a state where I'd have to go and see my family at every opportunity.

  2. #2
    videodrones; questions Verfremdungseffekt's Avatar
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    I'm not really sure what you mean.

    Then again, I've never quite understood how a family is supposed to function. It always confuses me when I encounter one that, well, does.

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    half mystic, half skeksis jenocyde's Avatar
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    Agree with Aderack about the shock of finding happy families. But I guess I need to understand if you are talking about Bush style family values or like curfews and things like that.

    All I know is that I get very resentful if a man I'm dating wants me to spend too much time with his family.

  4. #4
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    "family values" is a meaningless expression, depends to each.

  5. #5
    Habitual Fi LineStepper JocktheMotie's Avatar
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    I like my family, some of them at least. I actually hang out with siblings and cousins more than some of my actual friends, but that's just because I think they're cool people, not out of any sense of obligation.

    Family Values is a rather broad term though...not entirely sure what you mean.



  6. #6
    Minister of Propagandhi ajblaise's Avatar
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    Phrases like "family values" and "small-town values" are usually code for social conservative and religious values and a strict interpretation about what a proper family should be.

    So my view is that it's a highly politicized term, rendering it almost meaningless in non-political contexts.

  7. #7
    Listening Oaky's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Aderack View Post
    I'm not really sure what you mean.

    Then again, I've never quite understood how a family is supposed to function. It always confuses me when I encounter one that, well, does.
    What I mean is, in another term, how much does an NT care about their own families? Do you help when they are in need? Are the bonds strong within the family? If someone in the family is sick would you go and keep them company? Do you feel any responsibility about what happens to your family? The higher the family values the more one would do these things.

  8. #8
    half mystic, half skeksis jenocyde's Avatar
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    I have a huge family and am close with a vast majority of them because, like Jock, I actually like them as people. And that's the only reason.

  9. #9
    On a mission Usehername's Avatar
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    I make an effort to go visit my young cousins and tire them out playing with them for their parent's sake, and find their company rewarding (though admittedly draining). I go visit my grandparents because I know the presence of a young 20-something with a good attitude starting out in life settles their soul a little, and also because they're intelligent and well-read and I can relate to their interests and learn from them.

    IMO, this is the "ideal" because every generation has something to offer the other one. I find different rewards from spending time with all of my (mentally healthy and non-poisonous personality) relatives.

    Though I should admit it averages out to maybe once or twice a month that I go and visit them on my own outside of holiday gatherings, so I'm not really big on huge involvement, only the idea that every generation has something to offer the other one.
    Last edited by Usehername; 08-07-2009 at 11:17 PM.
    *You don't have a soul. You are a Soul. You have a body.
    *Faith is the art of holding on to things your reason once accepted, despite your changing moods.
    C.S. Lewis

  10. #10
    @.~*virinaĉo*~.@ Totenkindly's Avatar
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    I used to hate family stuff as a teen.
    (Then again, I was the only NT in my entire family of mostly SJs with a few SPs.... and my family was really fubar... religiosity coupled with dysfunctional psychology).

    Spending most of my adult life I did spent in scenarios with my in-laws side, who were also SJ but were actually sane (even with the typical pitfalls), and I did learn to appreciate family for what it was and take pleasure in the practice and stability of the routine interactions that are dictated by a family relationship. It was just a different framework than my natural one, but with different pro's and con's.

    While things there eventually didn't go as I hoped, I did learn to respect and appreciate "family" and some tradition as an institution. it's not an evil thing inherently, although it's easily manipulated and abused and leveraged.
    "Hey Capa -- We're only stardust." ~ "Sunshine"

    “Pleasure to me is wonder—the unexplored, the unexpected, the thing that is hidden and the changeless thing that lurks behind superficial mutability. To trace the remote in the immediate; the eternal in the ephemeral; the past in the present; the infinite in the finite; these are to me the springs of delight and beauty.” ~ H.P. Lovecraft

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