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Thread: Need Help

  1. #1
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    Default Need Help

    I'm starting to have a little bit of a problem for me, my F for some reason is really starting to show itself. I mean it's not like i don't like it, It's not as bad as it seems, I'm starting to see myself as a happier less pessimistic person and its becoming easier to socialize and stuff. Could anyone tell me how to develop my F but still have T/F balanced?
    Quote Originally Posted by Orangey View Post
    Incidentally, I believe that I am a dominant Ti user, and I often have trouble explaining things that I understand well. It's a matter of organizing the presentation of material. I can have it perfectly organized in my head all at once, but structuring the sequential delivery of material so that others understand is a different matter entirely, and requires a different skill set that I am apparently lacking.

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    Quote Originally Posted by deepthought View Post
    I'm starting to have a little bit of a problem for me, my F for some reason is really starting to show itself. I mean it's not like i don't like it, It's not as bad as it seems, I'm starting to see myself as a happier less pessimistic person and its becoming easier to socialize and stuff. Could anyone tell me how to develop my F but still have T/F balanced?
    just let it play out. observe but don't try to control

    you are dominantly NT, so it will balance out in by itself

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    Ruler of the Stars Asterion's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by deepthought View Post
    I'm starting to have a little bit of a problem for me, my F for some reason is really starting to show itself. I mean it's not like i don't like it, It's not as bad as it seems, I'm starting to see myself as a happier less pessimistic person and its becoming easier to socialize and stuff. Could anyone tell me how to develop my F but still have T/F balanced?
    Was this little F about 3 foot 2 inches and covered from head to foot in fluffy pink fur?

    How can you really associate this with F? This seems more like growth to me, or at the very least, you've stepped out of this tertiary temptation thing...
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    Quote Originally Posted by thisGuy View Post
    just let it play out. observe but don't try to control
    you are dominantly NT, so it will balance out in by itself
    That...

    Quote Originally Posted by King-Of-Despair View Post
    How can you really associate this with F? This seems more like growth to me, or at the very least, you've stepped out of this tertiary temptation thing...
    ...and that.

    Change is disorientating, especially if you're used to being a thinker type predominately. The detachment can create social issues and dissatisfaction and loneliness, but when you start to become more social and enjoy interacting on a new whole level (to you), it can feel like you're moving away from "yourself" and losing the self that you knew.

    I know as I made that transition from approaching everything through raw intellect, I even started to feel "stupider" in some ways. I wasn't actually dumber, I just was approaching things more through other forms of evaluation and being less rigorous about the "raw rationality" assessment process and treating myself and others as more human.

    Ultimately I think, the goal is for you to be happy, healthy, and effective as a human being... whatever that entails. I also believe that being in balance is healthier than being at an extreme; at the very least, you're more well-rounded and capable of dealing with a variety of things and branching out.

    Could you explain a little more what you mean by keeping T/F balanced, if there is more to it?
    "Hey Capa -- We're only stardust." ~ "Sunshine"

    “Pleasure to me is wonder—the unexplored, the unexpected, the thing that is hidden and the changeless thing that lurks behind superficial mutability. To trace the remote in the immediate; the eternal in the ephemeral; the past in the present; the infinite in the finite; these are to me the springs of delight and beauty.” ~ H.P. Lovecraft

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    half mystic, half skeksis jenocyde's Avatar
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    You can, and do, have both. It's jarring at first to find out you care, but it's kind of nice after a while.

    My Fe came out in the most weird way, kind of like a boy's voice cracking in puberty. I was taking up random crusades and trying to manipulate/mind control people to my new way of thinking. It was weird. I basically cared but had no idea how to express it in any way that wasn't forceful.

    I remember the first time I hugged someone solely because they were crying and it simply made me feel sad, instead of thinking that they were a drama queen/attention whore.

    It just takes patience and practice. But your T is going nowhere.

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    Ruler of the Stars Asterion's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by jenocyde View Post
    You can, and do, have both. It's jarring at first to find out you care, but it's kind of nice after a while.

    My Fe came out in the most weird way, kind of like a boy's voice cracking in puberty. I was taking up random crusades and trying to manipulate/mind control people to my new way of thinking. It was weird. I basically cared but had no idea how to express it in any way that wasn't forceful.

    I remember the first time I hugged someone solely because they were crying and it simply made me feel sad, instead of thinking that they were a drama queen/attention whore.

    It just takes patience and practice. But your T is going nowhere.
    I'd swear that Fe thing happened to me about half a year ago, I can't quite remember what it was, but I suddenly decided that the way I dealt with people up until that point, was completely abusive or something, and I ended up painting one of my friends into an asshole in the process of 'changing his behavior' , and then eventually forced myself to apologize after discussing the whole thing with an INFJ. But I think I apologized because it would make me look better . Damn, I'm still an asshole...

    I'd probably never hug someone like that though... , I'd be more likely to try to make jokes or something I think, I'm not sure. Maybe I do need to work on my Fe a bit.
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    half mystic, half skeksis jenocyde's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by King-Of-Despair View Post
    I'd swear that Fe thing happened to me about half a year ago, I can't quite remember what it was, but I suddenly decided that the way I dealt with people up until that point, was completely abusive or something, and I ended up painting one of my friends into an asshole in the process of 'changing his behavior' , and then eventually forced myself to apologize after discussing the whole thing with an INFJ. But I think I apologized because it would make me look better . Damn, I'm still an asshole...

    I'd probably never hug someone like that though... , I'd be more likely to try to make jokes or something I think, I'm not sure. Maybe I do need to work on my Fe a bit.
    Aww, but that's the Fe for ya. And being 3rd on the list means it's a bit more calculated. I assure you that I did not want to hug this person, but after studying chick flicks, I realized that this is probably what she wanted and she did. Don't get me wrong, I sincerely felt sad that she was sad, but I tore that page out of "empathy 101". So I identify with your apologizing for appearances sake thingy. I have strong feelings but I still stumble over how they are supposed to play a role in the grand scheme of things.

    And since I have only shown physical affection to romantic partners, I am not sure how to show it to non-romantic partners. I get very awkward and clumsy and weird. But I'm compelled to keep trying. I once yelled at someone for not letting me hug them. I actually screamed "you're sad, and you're my friend, so you *will* hug me goddammit!!!".

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    Quote Originally Posted by deepthought View Post
    Could anyone tell me how to develop my F but still have T/F balanced?
    Let Ne express itself too. It'll complement the F and help you to just roll with it.

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    Quote Originally Posted by jenocyde View Post
    Aww, but that's the Fe for ya. And being 3rd on the list means it's a bit more calculated. I assure you that I did not want to hug this person, but after studying chick flicks, I realized that this is probably what she wanted and she did. Don't get me wrong, I sincerely felt sad that she was sad, but I tore that page out of "empathy 101". So I identify with your apologizing for appearances sake thingy. I have strong feelings but I still stumble over how they are supposed to play a role in the grand scheme of things.

    And since I have only shown physical affection to romantic partners, I am not sure how to show it to non-romantic partners. I get very awkward and clumsy and weird. But I'm compelled to keep trying. I once yelled at someone for not letting me hug them. I actually screamed "you're sad, and you're my friend, so you *will* hug me goddammit!!!".
    *amused look*

    This is too adorable
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