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[INTP] The Unhealthy INTP

Joined
Apr 23, 2009
Messages
1,992
MBTI Type
ENTJ
Enneagram
8w9
It's never enough. I'm always driven to something better, something more. Meaning, understanding. A stable life is a sucky life. I crave change, evolution.

I think I understand. I think your worst fear is stagnation. Am I close? I think INTPs just have this innate drive to move forward of constant development and improvement. And sometimes you get impatient and you beat yourself up for it, and that's when you tend to create a catch 22 for yourself of negative thoughts and feelings. "I'm a failure, cause I fail, I fail cause I'm a failure" and then you just feel worse and worse. I get the feeling that it's always something in your external environment that eventually breaks this cycle.

Although I'm much like the INTP in the sense that I look for constant development and improvement, I don't beat myself up for my failures. I try to learn from them asap cause I'm always in a hurry to move forward. My eyes are always on the price, looking for new solutions and I enjoy a fast paced lifestyle.
 

Fluffywolf

Nips away your dignity
Joined
Mar 31, 2009
Messages
9,581
MBTI Type
INTP
Enneagram
9
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
I think I understand. I think your worst fear is stagnation. Am I close? I think INTPs just have this innate drive to move forward of constant development and improvement. And sometimes you get impatient and you beat yourself up for it, and that's when you tend to create a catch 22 for yourself of negative thoughts and feelings. "I'm a failure, cause I fail, I fail cause I'm a failure" and then you just feel worse and worse. I get the feeling that it's always something in your external environment that eventually breaks this cycle.

Although I'm much like the INTP in the sense that I look for constant development and improvement, I don't beat myself up for my failures. I try to learn from them asap cause I'm always in a hurry to move forward. My eyes are always on the price, looking for new solutions and I enjoy a fast paced lifestyle.

I don't beat myself up over failures. If I did, I'd probably find myself a failure. Because beating yourself up over failures, and thus self imposing stagnation on yourself, is like the biggest failure in life. INTP's that beat themselves up over failure like that are probably just immature. But I'm never contempt with what I have either.

(If I take my 'unhealthy' period out of equation that is, and that period was more related to events and immaturity than with type.)
 

Totenkindly

@.~*virinaĉo*~.@
Joined
Apr 19, 2007
Messages
50,187
MBTI Type
BELF
Enneagram
594
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
I think I understand. I think your worst fear is stagnation. Am I close? I think INTPs just have this innate drive to move forward of constant development and improvement.

Inside, yes.

Outside there's often a drive to stabilize one's existence, to allow mental resources to be freed up to explore... but I'm sensing lately in life that the stability is calcifying.

In terms of inherent knowledge and growth, I once envisioned my heart like a tin can tied by a string on the back of a bike I was peddling madly down the road, clattering behind me... the brain and essence is rushing forward all the time, insanely driven to evolve... but the more emotional parts can never quite catch up, the spirit and mind is always a few steps ahead.

And sometimes you get impatient and you beat yourself up for it, and that's when you tend to create a catch 22 for yourself of negative thoughts and feelings. "I'm a failure, cause I fail, I fail cause I'm a failure" and then you just feel worse and worse. I get the feeling that it's always something in your external environment that eventually breaks this cycle.

I did that for years and years. Pretty much my worst obstacle between myself and success was... me.

Finally everything broke down, and I had to grow up and stop beating myself up. I don't really do it anymore, there is no more blame or self-castigating. I still can screw things up royally, but the shame and self-castigation is gone, it says nothing about who I am. I just make mistakes, and I get over it, and move on.
 
Joined
Apr 23, 2009
Messages
1,992
MBTI Type
ENTJ
Enneagram
8w9
Inside, yes.

Outside there's often a drive to stabilize one's existence, to allow mental resources to be freed up to explore... but I'm sensing lately in life that the stability is calcifying.

Makes a lot of sense.
 

Ulaes

loopy
Joined
Jan 11, 2009
Messages
850
MBTI Type
crak
Enneagram
sax
An INTP I know once told me he wished he felt more/was more comfortable with himself in different situations. I guess he was talking about social situations.

i think our Ti tells us that we can't be ourselves in most social situations and that things will go more smoothly if we follow convention.

Then I told him to get over himself.
get over it = the solution to all of life's problems. ever the entj motto. 100 points to you. (it works on me)

I've heard INTPs whine about their lives, even the ones that have pretty good lives; job, partner, stable life (financially, apartment), hobbies, friends ect. And they still got into these emo-states where nothing's good enough, like they're still missing something. Those times, I've just asked them: What the hell are you whining about? And they laugh.

the intp doesn't get as much satification or stimulation from external things as other types do. im thinking that due to the intps great capacity for detachment, those kinds of things can mean nothing.

At the end of the day, it seems like they take themselves way too seriously, cause I've noticed that at times when they don't, they can't actually resist to be happy.

thinking is serious business. the more simple the moment/life the better it is. i kind of think complicatedness is depressing and similicity is enjoyable, its part of human nature. uncertain:(/certain:), negative/positive.


i also think that because Fi is their eighth function and hence its not used, intps never know how things are affecting their emotions which means they don't take care of them. the intp might not be aware of steam building up concerning, for example, a manipulative or selfish person yet it works at them from the inside out, it remains an unsolved issue. if they cant see its there, they dont fix it and their subconscious, which is aware of the issue, lets the steam out for them through other "valves", i.e self destruction.
 

GatorGirl

New member
Joined
Sep 27, 2009
Messages
35
MBTI Type
ENTJ
Can a true INTP be psychologically healthy and happy, though, really?

I can't imagine it, they are utterly neurotic, and pessimistic by nature.

The closest thing to a smile they can muster is a smirk.

EDIT: Admittedly, I was thinking about my (unwell, and dead :)) INTP father as I was writing that thought.

Ahhh, but when you can make them smile, it is warmth is worth enduring all of the cold in between
 

MiasmaResonance

New member
Joined
Jul 18, 2009
Messages
155
MBTI Type
INTP
Enneagram
5w?
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
I guess I'm in a constant state of unhealthy. Damn it.
 

Risen

Permabanned
Joined
Mar 19, 2008
Messages
3,185
MBTI Type
ISTP
Enneagram
9w8
Even so, I still often feel like it's not enough. It's never enough. I'm always driven to something better, something more. Meaning, understanding. A stable life is a sucky life. I crave change, evolution.

Oh man, tell me about it! I'm not sure if it's for every INTP, but I definitely feed on gaining new knowledge and "evolving". If I'm not somehow moving forward it's depressing.


I think I understand. I think your worst fear is stagnation. Am I close? I think INTPs just have this innate drive to move forward of constant development and improvement. And sometimes you get impatient and you beat yourself up for it, and that's when you tend to create a catch 22 for yourself of negative thoughts and feelings. "I'm a failure, cause I fail, I fail cause I'm a failure" and then you just feel worse and worse. I get the feeling that it's always something in your external environment that eventually breaks this cycle.

Although I'm much like the INTP in the sense that I look for constant development and improvement, I don't beat myself up for my failures. I try to learn from them asap cause I'm always in a hurry to move forward. My eyes are always on the price, looking for new solutions and I enjoy a fast paced lifestyle.

It's not that we beat ourselves up over it. I think the issue, for me anyway, is that we NEEEED that stimulation of learning, challenging our brains, and evolving in our knowledge and understanding of the world/ourselves. It's a need as great as sex, for me. It can be filled with something as simple as new and novel social experiences that allow me to deeply process it and gain new insights to incorporate into my intricate web map of reality (Ne, Ti, and Si working together in the mind), or something of the academic/scientific sort. Either way, what is needed is something of SIGNIFICANT complexity (and there is truly nothing more complex than people) for our minds to consume. I think some people can be entertained and satisfied with a mere ball and string, but many INTPs require a relatively high level of complexity to really stimulate their minds. It sucks because the same things that most people may be entertained by can come off as completely mundane and simple to an INTP, making it difficult for them to relate. Fortunately, there are always other ways to relate to people other than what gets our neurons firing.

I know lately, in particular, I have been lacking the amount of stimulation I need, and it sucks a giant fucking load. It's worse than being a horny 16 year old and not even being able to jack off. It's like your mind slowly withers and you feel you'll die if you don't get something to challenge your brain.
 

baccheion

New member
Joined
Jan 10, 2013
Messages
777
When I'm unhealthy:

- Withdrawn/isolated to an extreme
- Stuck in a rut
- My mind stalls and I can't think
- Verbally abusive
- Judgmental
- Blunt
- Prone to emotional outbursts (though, usually, after I look back these were well-deserved and well-timed-- but still, I don't like acting out emotionally)
- Stop caring about life and my future thinking, "what's the point."
- Become very (painfully) narrow-minded, while being unable to get myself to think clearly or to see things as they actually are
- Become very angry at the world (but in hindsight this was mostly deserved, as everything was accurate-- but the thing is when I'm healthy I wouldn't dwell on it, I'd be too busy trying to move on or trying to work on whatever it is that caught my interest)

I don't get uncaring and cold, necessarily, that's just some typical accusation that's made of me because I'm not effusive with the bullshit compliments and smiles.
 
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