[MBTI General] "bored" of your friends?

[CzeCze]

I do get bored constantly. Unless I see lot of potential usage for them.

So warm! So fuzzy!

So, what kind of 'usage' are we talking about?

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I think 'easily bored' is an EP trait. Especially if you are Ne dom.

However, my *friends* don't bore me (I define "friend" more strictly than the popular definition of 'friend', so I don't have a lot of friends). I think if someone I considered to be a friend said, "you bore me" my response would be "who the $#@$ ever said I was supposed to entertain you???? am i your @#$#@$ toy??? how @#$#@$#@ old are you???" and some other choice words (I'm not sure exactly how to pronounce '@#$#@$@#$' but you get the idea)

Maybe this is a question of semantics? Don't think so though.

Anywhoo, I think EPs are generally flex. I assume people have balanced lives with varied interests. They have stuff going on. I expect and encourage them to meet new people and make new friends and try new things. And there is a flow to people's lives and therefore to relationships. And EPs are (theoretically) about 'going with the flow'

The fact that I try not to be stagnant and keep things moving in my own life isn't a dis against my friends or my social circle. I would never say that my friends, or even my acquaintances 'bore me'. Also, it's possible to try new hobbies, classes, cuisines, etc. with the same people for a change. In fact, trying new activities with the 'same people' (i.e. my friends) is great fun.

It's good to value what you have and also be able to branch out of the familiar.

Of course, if you realize you are no longer as compatible with a friend, that's another matter. Either you two are no longer clicking and the relationship is no longer as fulfilling or has the same expectations, or you're going through a life shift (entered college, moved to a new town, just broke up with SO, got promoted, or hey whateva reason) where you're a slightly different person and/or have different/new needs.

 

[FlamingMask]

This is a problem for me. I have fun with most of my friends pretty easily, most of the time, but this boredom that everyone in this thread seems to understand stems from two things for me:

1) There isn't much around to do that we haven't already done. This is probably not true, but it seems like all you can really do is wander around or spend money somewhere. A lot of what people spend their time doing is watching movies or drinking and attempting to ignore parts of their lives for a couple hours or so. This wouldn't be much of a problem for me except for...

2) My friends don't share many interests with me. I feel like there's a subtle communication barrier where we don't really talk about stuff that I find interest in. And I have a variety of interests. I really enjoy philosophy and speculation about life and the motivating drives behind peoples' actions and not popular culture so much. When I have a conversation I need to feel like there's a purpose. It doesn't have to be structured or planned out like a debate or something, but it has to have a bit of relevancy or be driving at something or I'm lost. I'm all for short - perhaps humorous - observations that go sort of rapid fire - back and forth, but not all the time. Otherwise I feel myself sort of tightening inside.

thisGuy, is this the sort of thing you're talking about? Anyone else feel the same way? Anyone think I'm wrong for some reason or going about things the wrong way? Anyone have any solutions or methods to deal with this problem?

 

[sunset5678]

nope, i never get bored of the few friends i have b/c they are my sanity
from all the idiots, morons, halfwits and imbeciles that I am forced 2 put
up with. Blonde moments come and go while stupidity is often irreversible
once it sets in...lol.

 

[CzeCze]

Flaming Mask, how old are you and how big is your town? I think it's a sign that you want to branch out. It can seem like you've been everywhere and done everything, and the irony is that it's often other people who help you to see with new eyes. But, if you're trying to find these people in the first place...see, that's the crux!

I think it helps to branch out on your own and I know you INTPs can work the interwebz. If you do a little bit of snooping you might be surprised at the amount of randomness in your backyard.

It helps to start with a hobby or interest or go solo to an event that catches your eye. When you are genuinely interested in something, it's much easier (for any type) to meet road-dogs and activity buddies. You can start from there. Especially since you mentioned a sense of 'purpose' in what you prefer for conversation?

These activity partners may not become "friends" per sae, but you will start exploring and developing areas of your life and interests and genuinely enjoy yourself without feeling misunderstood or like you have to fake anything. And once you start getting into that groove, it gets easier to meet and connect with people in general.

Etc. etc.

Help any?

 

[FlamingMask]

I like your idea of branching out. It's something I've always done well intellectually, but probably not socially. If I get outgoing with my interests, hopefully I'll meet people who I connect with more readily.

I think it helps to branch out on your own and I know you INTPs can work the interwebz. If you do a little bit of snooping you might be surprised at the amount of randomness in your backyard.

I've sort of tried this, but usually I only find things to do when I'm alone. I've seen lists of things to do when you're bored, but they are filled with dumb things and don't really address the problem. If snooping on the internet is what's required, I'm not doing it right.

I know what I need to do but I'm not sure how to do it. And of course it would help to have more free time., or to be less of a procrastinator.

 

[Halla74]

ever feel your bored of your friends and wuold like nothing but to get away from these peeps?

dont get me wrong...i love these dude and dudettes. INTP, ENFP, and me are the best buddies ever...except i can't get rid of this feeling that i need to meet some new people...new perspectives, i know my friends so well i can usually predict what they are gonna say before they say it

everytime we meet, we do the same shit...its a lot of fun and what not but faaaaaaaaaaaaaack...

i think i need a 'mentor'...someone i dont feel superior to...someone i cant own in every convo i have...someone who is better than me and can push me around...someone i have an unusually high amount of respect for, to the point of admiration


who thinks im retarted

NEVER!!!

My friends are dear to me.

Each of them have made me a better person, have contributed to my overall being and understanding of myself and life.

If you feel otherwise you need new friends.

I'd take a bullet for any of them.

In total my best of friends number less than ten, but I have countless acquaintances...ESTP...hello!

 

[runvardh]

I only get bored when it's always the same tricks and new territory remains unexplored.