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Thread: Holiday Apathy

  1. #11

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    I understand why people would get disillusioned with holidays and not want to celebrate them. But I love holidays. I think the key for me is to concentrate on what it means to me - my memories and my traditions. Everyone doesn't have to celebrate in the same fashion, and I don't see commercialism or overhype as an obstacle to my personal enjoyment of the holidays.
    Everybody have fun tonight. Everybody Wang Chung tonight.

    Johari
    /Nohari

  2. #12
    Feline Member kelric's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ceecee View Post
    I hated the holidays when I was growing up. My mother got so stressed out and it made them a nightmare.
    I was in the same boat. Holidays have always been, for me, something to endure, and never something to enjoy. When my parents got divorced it really started to take off, and even now, 20 years later, I'm always relieved when they're over (I still get beaten up with guilt-trips about once every year or two). I don't have kids, so I'm still sort of stuck with the expectation that I'll "come home for the holidays".

    Personally, I don't have any sort of desire to celebrate holidays, birthdays, etc. They're all pretty much arbitrary, and the traditions associated with them are more of a burden than anything. I could see feeling differently about things like anniversaries, perhaps.

    Quote Originally Posted by Alwar View Post
    Holidays would be important if they had anything to do with family and community, but anymore its just marketing and expenditures like KristinSnowdeal said.
    The commercialization of holidays annoys me to no end too, but it's mostly the stress of expectations. The holidays I tend to like the most are the ones that have neither commercialization nor expectations placed on them (Labor day's a favorite) - simply days off to do as I like, either with friends/family or alone. Christmas, with both massive commercialization and (beyond) massive stress, is the worst.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

  3. #13
    Emerging Tallulah's Avatar
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    I can definitely relate to the OP, Misty. I like holidays sometimes, especially if someone else plans the festivities. But I don't decorate and plan and all that myself much. Every once in a while, I'll get excited and have people over for dinner or something, but then it passes. And I do get irritated at having to listen to Christmas music starting in September, but that's another issue--this really isn't about the commercialization of holidays.

    I don't have kids, but I have often worried that I wouldn't be a great parent because my life wouldn't revolve around my kids' lives and making things fun for them. It'd probably be more like fitting kids into my own life and what's convenient for me. Which I know would suck for them. But I'm not the type to read Parenting and buy the stuff to make little giraffes out of papier mache and pipe cleaners or to spend every Saturday afternoon of my life watching 5-year-olds play teeball. Every once in a while, I'd probably feel guilty and do something crafty with them or play a board game, but mostly, that stuff bores the heck out of me, and I have to psych myself up to do it with my niece and nephew. I have a feeling holidays would be the same, unless I had a husband that took over in that area.
    Something Witty

  4. #14
    Senior Member forzen's Avatar
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    Only reason i like holidays is because it gets me off work. Other than that, just another day i guess, maybe a day to reminence on fond memory i had when i was a kid...when i cared about it.

  5. #15
    half mystic, half skeksis jenocyde's Avatar
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    I hate holidays. just one more thing to fucking remember...

  6. #16
    cast shadows metaphours's Avatar
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    the reason i dislike holidays so much is because you know they're gonna come to an end :S

  7. #17
    Senior Member Saslou's Avatar
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    Being an ESFJ, holidays HAVE to be special (esp xmas and birthdays). Every occasion, i am left disappointed. I believe my expectations are just to high and i major suck. Being with an INTJ during these holidays sucked even more as he didn't seem to be enjoying himself (other than cooking the food), looked miserable most of the time and just generally treated it as another day.

  8. #18
    Widdles in your cream.
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    As long as I have an internet café in the vicinity, I'm generally okay with holidays. a 10 day holiday is certainly enough, though. A day longer and I suffer from cabin fever.
    Um, yeah.

  9. #19
    Feline Member kelric's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by saslou View Post
    Being an ESFJ, holidays HAVE to be special (esp xmas and birthdays). Every occasion, i am left disappointed.
    I think that's part of the problem that so many people have with holidays. To some people, they're incredibly important and special, something to be cherished and enjoyed - and to others, they're something uncomfortable to endure. Certainly those are two extremes, but I suspect that there are many families with one or both types present. I know mine is/was one of them. Some people come out of them feeling disappointed and let down, others come out of them feeling inadequate and yet somehow relieved. Add into the mix that the holidays that are the most important to some (you mentioned xmas/birthdays) are exactly the ones that folks like me dread the most. Can be a frustrating mix for all .

    Quote Originally Posted by saslou View Post
    I believe my expectations are just to high
    Probably.

    Quote Originally Posted by saslou View Post
    and i major suck.
    Unlikely .

    Quote Originally Posted by saslou View Post
    Being with an INTJ during these holidays sucked even more as he didn't seem to be enjoying himself (other than cooking the food), looked miserable most of the time and just generally treated it as another day.
    I think that's pretty common - I know that it's the way I feel. To me, holidays are just another day (at best), and I just don't see the big deal. I hate to make light of your unfortunate experience with your INTJ... but I can *totally* see him enjoying preparing the meal (let me guess - he was more or less by himself here, and had a task to try and excel at/focus on, rather than socializing/entertaining)... and then being uncomfortable the rest of the time.

    I don't know if there's an answer to this - it's not even a situation that's particularly amenable to compromise. I know that my Mom (who I believe would agree with you on the importance of holidays) would prefer lots of family holiday get-togethers, whereas I'd prefer a phone call (if that - holiday calls tend to have more potential for ugliness and conflict than any other) and visiting at pretty much any other time of the year. If I had a family of my own, I could probably tolerate small, casual get togethers on perhaps one or two holidays a year... but I'd still be glad when they were over.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

  10. #20
    Emerging Tallulah's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Grungemouse View Post
    As long as I have an internet café in the vicinity, I'm generally okay with holidays. a 10 day holiday is certainly enough, though. A day longer and I suffer from cabin fever.
    Heh--holidays in the American sense of the word, is what the OP's referring to. I freaking LOVE holidays in the British sense. The more days off/vacation, the better.
    Something Witty

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