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[INTJ] How many of you would like to see INTJ in tears ?

Virtual ghost

Complex paradigm
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Jun 6, 2008
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How many of you would like to see INTJ in tears ?
If yes why yes ?


To me it looks like that alot of people in real life would like to see me crying while I am looking for emotional comfort/help in someone.
It is not that they hate me it is just that they would like to see this. Some of them have even said to me that they have a hard time imagining something like this.

I mean, alot of people are placing bets when I will finally explode.



So I am wondering how many of you have this kind of a relationship with your INTJ ?


Are situations like his/her crying strengthening bounds between you ?
 

thisGuy

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i think it would simply cuz its a rare and personal to the INTJ...and a rare thing shared with someone has to amount to something

personally? i couldnt care less. though, if my INTJ friends ever cried withe me around, first thing id do is look'em in the eye and get an idea of their current headspace...then go from there
 

BerberElla

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No, I certainly have no desire to see an INTJ in tears lol on the other hand I'd like to see some of my enemies in tears. :devil:
 

Siúil a Rúin

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Condolences. I would find that a bit exasperating myself. I seriously don't think that people who understand a little about introverted thinkers are inclined to fixate on their assumed need to cry. There is conventional wisdom that says people shouldn't bottle up their emotions and should just "let it all out". There is something to that, and maybe it is possible you are bottling things up. Although it might be they are creating a self-fulfilling prophecy where they drive you crazy to the point you will explode. It also creates a scenario where if you did need to cry, all this fuss would make it worse. Crying is not the only outlet for "getting it all out". Some people exercise, work on projects, solve problems, and some people don't have that much emotion that needs channeling in the first place. Online you seem to fit the last statement. The strengthening/bonding that comes from seeing someone cry is probably because it is an expression the other person understands.

I feel especially awful when an INT cries because it is rare and doesn't typically happen unless things are pretty horrendous.
 

Antimony

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People tend to want to see me explode too, but they don't normally see it happening (out of sadness). People think that I am really scary as far as anger goes (but I never give them any reason).

I would not like to see an INTJ in tears, because it seems like that is an admirable trait in INTJs-their self control. I don't mind seeing other people in tears, but it would be especially painful to see an INTJ because it seems so...unINTJish.
 
G

garbage

Guest
Only the ones who are complete pricks. And there are a lot of those.

But that's not strictly a type issue.
 

Athenian200

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No, I don't want to see one in tears. I would prefer everyone to be happy (or at least neutral) all the time. But I hope that if I befriend one, and they do end up in tears (which may only happen once in their lifetime), they won't be too ashamed to let me console them.

To be honest, it would be hard for me to see an INTJ cry. I usually look up to them as stronger versions of myself. Watching them fall apart is especially frightening for that reason. Because it makes me realize that as fragile as I feel myself to be, I'm actually stronger than them when it comes to coping with and healing from a "direct hit" on my emotions. I don't want that responsibility...
 

Virtual ghost

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Condolences. I would find that a bit exasperating myself. I seriously don't think that people who understand a little about introverted thinkers are inclined to fixate on their assumed need to cry. There is conventional wisdom that says people shouldn't bottle up their emotions and should just "let it all out". There is something to that, and maybe it is possible you are bottling things up. Although it might be they are creating a self-fulfilling prophecy where they drive you crazy to the point you will explode. It also creates a scenario where if you did need to cry, all this fuss would make it worse. Crying is not the only outlet for "getting it all out". Some people exercise, work on projects, solve problems, and some people don't have that much emotion that needs channeling in the first place. Online you seem to fit the last statement. The strengthening/bonding that comes from seeing someone cry is probably because it is an expression the other person understands.

I feel especially awful when an INT cries because it is rare and doesn't typically happen unless things are pretty horrendous.

Well this is going for over 20 years in my case so I think I would have exploded by now. Also I am making progress in my life constantly so I am constantly "on the move". So I trully doubt that I am bottling emotions.




No, I don't want to see one in tears. I would prefer everyone to be happy (or at least neutral) all the time. But I hope that if I befriend one, and they do end up in tears (which may only happen once in their lifetime), they won't be too ashamed to let me console them.

To be honest, it would be hard for me to see an INTJ cry. I usually look up to them as stronger versions of myself. Watching them fall apart is especially frightening for that reason. Because it makes me realize that as fragile as I feel myself to be, I'm actually stronger than them when it comes to coping with and healing from a "direct hit" on my emotions. I don't want that responsibility...

Well I have experianced this as well. People regulary presume that I will be the last man standing. At least they give this vibe to me.
 

runvardh

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No thanks, I don't see a need to demand the amount of emotion required for this. If one were to do that around me I wouldn't have a problem, I just find out what I need to do. Past that it's up to the individual and the situation...
 

simulatedworld

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My mother told me she's seen my INTJ father cry three times since she's known him.

1) When he found out his first child, my sister, was born with a circulatory disorder and would have to have risky open heart surgery in the first week of her life. (She was fine.)
2) When my younger brother had a seizure and the doctors said he had a 30% chance of serious brain damage (he was fine.)
3) When Mr. Spock died in Star Trek II.

:)
 

runvardh

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Things would have to be REALLY bad before an INTJ cried.

Exactly why I don't look for it, just try to act appropreately when it happens...
 

BlackCat

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I like it when my friends let out their emotions when they are dealing with their problems. I find that when I have experienced their raw emotion toward the situation that I can help them much better. I don't expect people to cry unless that's part of their raw emotion.

It's not tears, just the emotion that I would like to see.
 

runvardh

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When it comes to an INTJ, if you're waiting for the tears to show up to know something is wrong you don't know the person well enough for them to let the tears come to begin with. Or at least that has been my experience.
 

Laurie

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Truthfully an INTJ crying doesn't seem far fetched to me. But I've been close to INTJs so ive seen deeply internal feelings from them.
 

Amargith

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FC3S

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Seeing an INTJ in tears is easy.
 

Siúil a Rúin

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Well this is going for over 20 years in my case so I think I would have exploded by now. Also I am making progress in my life constantly so I am constantly "on the move". So I trully doubt that I am bottling emotions.
The most pragmatic approach might be to take an acting class and practice at home. You might be on the fast track to an Oscar. :newwink:

Seriously, as the years go by you will likely have opportunity to reorganize your life to minimize these types of pressures. It isn't reasonable for people to pressure someone to express emotions and cry.
 

Shimmy

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I don't have a strong preference to see anybody cry. If you really really want to, I know that the death of a parent or close friend will do the trick.
 
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