[MBTI General] Wanting to be both T and F, what made u decide which?

[wildcat]

I think it's a shame of having to choose between T and F. Does the T side handle the emotions adequately, and is it fun and ethical? Does the F side handle thinking adequately, and is it consistent and logical?

I have sometimes been unsure of my preference, thinking that I'm in the middle. Then seeing NT vs NF forums has been the deciding factor, as NF topics have seemed ok and lovely, they are not such topics that I think constantly about.

Also when going too deep in the NF terrain I feel sometimes coming across as ridiculous and hurt. NT feelinglessness is kind of dull emotionally and leaves much to be desired, but NT type intellectual goals are damned great to do, and they work better for me than NF things.

Have you been uncertain of your preference on the T/F scale and what made you decide which one you are?

Middle is not middle.

 

[Ghost of the dead horse]

Middle is not middle.

You really like to be cryptic!

 

[niki]

um..."T" is basically more concerned with products (even when they do think 'abstractly' , they tend towards "product"-oriented, rather than people-oriented or any 'touchy-feely' personal aspects of person)
while "F" is basically more concerned with people , rather than products (generally speaking) ,..am I right? just based on my own observation & experience.

this is not saying that "T" folks just can't 'feel' or 'warm' and be emotional & personal towards human beings & others, or that "F" folks can't think logically or rationally. No! It's just generally-speaking, those are the basic things that differentiate between "T" and "F" folks.

 

[Totenkindly]

um..."T" is basically more concerned with products (even when they do think 'abstractly' , they tend towards "product"-oriented, rather than people-oriented or any 'touchy-feely' personal aspects of person)
while "F" is basically more concerned with people , rather than products (generally speaking) ,..am I right? just based on my own observation & experience.

Or to put it another way, T's naturally "objectify" things to some degree. People are easily viewed as "things" not in a bad sense but simply in terms of seeing how they move about, react/respond, like pieces of a machine/system. How the object behaves by itself and in relation to others is what is being noticed first. F's have a much harder time not "personifying" things.

Note: I know my phrasing shows T bias... no negativity is meant, okay?

 

[INTJMom]

um..."T" is basically more concerned with products (even when they do think 'abstractly' , they tend towards "product"-oriented, rather than people-oriented or any 'touchy-feely' personal aspects of person)
while "F" is basically more concerned with people , rather than products (generally speaking) ,..am I right? just based on my own observation & experience.

this is not saying that "T" folks just can't 'feel' or 'warm' and be emotional & personal towards human beings & others, or that "F" folks can't think logically or rationally. No! It's just generally-speaking, those are the basic things that differentiate between "T" and "F" folks.

That sounds generally correct to me.
There are others here who know more than I do and might have something to add.

Why do you ask?

 

[Totenkindly]

This does also point to a pretty clear NF preference, but when I read descriptions for INFP and INFJ both have a lot of elements I relate to and I find I often get along withe NTs better than NFs so I feel I can't completely rule out the idea of being an NT with an overdevloped Fi when neither INFJ or INFP are a flawless fit.

Well, you will not find a "flawless" fit anywhere, you're a unique individual who will deviate in SOME way from the stereotypical type. It's more a matter of seeing if those variations can be logically attributed to something unique in your life.

It's also not uncommon for some NTs to feel better around NFs or NFs to feel better around NTs, depending on the specific person.

(I know at least one NF who won't go to a popular INFP board because there's too much emo there.)

 

[ladypinkington]

I find the question very interesting- but how does one choose?
I cannot choose- I am so strongly F- I don't know how not to be. Can anyone choose if they are not more of a 50/50 F/T?

Every test I take I find out that my Ti and Te are the lowest of the low. I never got it developed well. Perhaps not going to high school or college and moving around 28 times and being raised by a single mother who is also highly F is the reason. I find that after being married to an ENTP - he helps me to develop my T and I love learning and watching the history channel and Nova. I find that my N makes up for my lack of T though if that makes sense- and I wonder if it gets in the way- it substitues it so much that it is blocked from being developed the way it should I don't know.

How does one develop their Te and Ti especially when they are such a dominant F- when I say dominant I am talking 96 percent here no joke,lol? Is developing the same as choosing?

 

[INTJMom]

I think Santtu meant that he is trying to "decide" which one he is.

Because you're right, it's not a conscious choice.

 

[nightning]

San: You don't really need to know if you're a F or a T. It's okay to be in the middle as well. The main thing with MBTI is to help understand yourself and based on that, how to make interactions with other people smoother. In fact you can think of having no strong preference as a plus for you. It makes interactions with either type (T/F) easier because you don't have natural bias. But if you really really want to be one over the other... think to yourself which do you like more? If you believe strongly in it and practice, your function usage will start shifting and you'll be what you want.

How does one develop their Te and Ti especially when they are such a dominant F- when I say dominant I am talking 96 percent here no joke,lol? Is developing the same as choosing?

Well the thing that really kicked start Ti for me are discussions here on MBTIc and INTPc from before. The atmosphere in INTPc is much more Tish... perhaps you can try inserting yourself there. Also try logics puzzles and just explain random things logically to people. Let Ni make connections between two things and then explain how it arrived from point A to B.

 

[Ghost of the dead horse]

San: You don't really need to know if you're a F or a T. It's okay to be in the middle as well. The main thing with MBTI is to help understand yourself and based on that, how to make interactions with other people smoother. In fact you can think of having no strong preference as a plus for you. It makes interactions with either type (T/F) easier because you don't have natural bias. But if you really really want to be one over the other... think to yourself which do you like more? If you believe strongly in it and practice, your function usage will start shifting and you'll be what you want.


Well the thing that really kicked start Ti for me are discussions here on MBTIc and INTPc from before. The atmosphere in INTPc is much more Tish... perhaps you can try inserting yourself there. Also try logics puzzles and just explain random things logically to people. Let Ni make connections between two things and then explain how it arrived from point A to B.

Yeah, that's what I do. I decide now and then that now I want to be involved in this kind of project or this kind of lifestyle and it is more the kind of project/lifestyle that takes into account my T/F. Having done this for years and being in the middle, my score usually reflects the kind of lifestyle I've enjoyed during the last few months. With some deep projects / ventures, I lose some of the flexibility to switch sides for some time.

 

[Ghost of the dead horse]

I think Santtu meant that he is trying to "decide" which one he is.

Because you're right, it's not a conscious choice.

I left it ambivalent, meaning essentially the both possibilities.

The idea of "deciding what I should be" is motivated by my perception that the ideas brought to you by T and F can be partially conflicting, and that they have you take opposite course of action. In some life situations, one would like to be able to decide, which "advisor" they should listen more, especially if they feel being unable to solve a stagnant situation otherwise.

The idea of "deciding what preference would describe me better" is motivated by interest to MBTI and understanding oneself with jungian psychology.

 

[INTJMom]

I left it ambivalent, meaning essentially the both possibilities.

The idea of "deciding what I should be" is motivated by my perception that the ideas brought to you by T and F can be partially conflicting, and that they have you take opposite course of action. In some life situations, one would like to be able to decide, which "advisor" they should listen more, especially if they feel being unable to solve a stagnant situation otherwise.

The idea of "deciding what preference would describe me better" is motivated by interest to MBTI and understanding oneself with jungian psychology.

Okay. I understand.

 

[CzeCze]

Hey Sanntu, who knows, maybe you CAN make a conscious decision to embrace or 'pass' as one over the other, but just barely.

It also depends on how old you are.

I think it'll be much easier to actually change the way you train yourself into seeing the world and reacting at 15 or even 25 than say 35 or 45.

I made the decision in college to switch to T from F -- or rather, I decided I just wanted to be more warm and embrace touchy feely and so started testing more F. Why the conscious switch? Because I felt really disconnected from people and I think people found me really cold and unapproachable and I hated that. I realized I really NEEDED to feel a connection. So maybe I was actually an F masking as a T, but anyhow yes I'm also on the border. The way I personally interpret it, my 'F' helps me feel connected to people which is what I want.

I think it's better to just let it be and instead of thinking 'F' or 'T' just think in a situation how you wish you felt as opposed to how you actually felt. If both are the same, you are in sync so need to change.

I think having reserves of both is having the best of both worlds. Being able to dispassionately see a situation and then feel what others are feeling, it's a pretty nice way to see the world.

 

[HeavyMetal]

0_o I'm too cold to be a feeler. Sha bang.

 

[CzeCze]

0_o I'm too cold to be a feeler. Sha bang.

Whoops, wasn't trying to say that 'T' automatically and always and only means cold and unapproachable. That was my own problem. I was probably an immature T or poorly expressed/stressed ENFP. I also don't think 'T' means robotic or any of those other 'thinking' stereotypes.

I'm not trying to propogate type stereotypes here.

I wait for an invitation on the 'rants' threads before I do that.