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  1. #71
    @.~*virinaĉo*~.@ Totenkindly's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by juggernaut View Post
    What I'm wondering is whether rudeness is the true defining feature of the NT personality?
    No, I would never use a negative quality as the "defining feature" of any personality type.

    It's because NT has a rational basis for their behavior, which might or might not accommodate social norms, and it is extremely resistant to pressure from said social forces unless the logic being used somehow accommodates it.

    (e.g., an NT politician can conform to social norms as part of a rational process of wooing people to get what she wants... but the behavior is pragmatic in approach, not instinctive).

    Then I realized that were just as many, if not more, rude NTPs.
    Thank you. That's so very kind, will you be my special friend now?

    Disclaimer: If you think you're a polite NT, please feel free to politely share with us why you think that's the case. I don't want to start another flamewar between the NTs, I just would like to know how other NTs see themselves.
    I'm pretty polite, by choice, because I don't see the point in burning bridges; I'm cognizant of the social norms and I see it as rational to follow them when I can... but when I was younger I got myself into trouble a bit with the SJ police. And I got chewed out earlier this season by my ISFP roommate who apparently thought NTs were the rudest people around because we operate different in terms of the social norms. But no, when I am rude, it's by choice and not by accident.

    Usually where I get into the most trouble with with my sense of humor. I find social gaffs amusing, and with friends I will sometimes offer the most "inappropriate" response possible, as a joke. However, if someone else witnesses it, they sometimes take it for real and get offended. The other week I even confused my best friend (another INTP, and we do this all the time with each other); he actually couldn't figure out "why I was mad" and apologized to me, but I thought he would have picked up on what I was doing. (Once I told him, he adjusted beautifully and stepped up the sarcasm pace.)

    Quote Originally Posted by Tallulah View Post
    What I can't stand are people who say stuff like, "Wow, you've gained a lot of weight since the last time I saw you!" or something equally rude and offputting. What is to gain by not filtering a comment like that? I can only imagine that things like that are said to even the playing field and take the receiver down a few pegs. Because, seriously? You've reached adulthood and not realized that things like that are offensive? No way.
    Yeah, that's just banal.

    At least invest some wit in the jest, don't just be stupid-rude.
    "Hey Capa -- We're only stardust." ~ "Sunshine"

    “Pleasure to me is wonder—the unexplored, the unexpected, the thing that is hidden and the changeless thing that lurks behind superficial mutability. To trace the remote in the immediate; the eternal in the ephemeral; the past in the present; the infinite in the finite; these are to me the springs of delight and beauty.” ~ H.P. Lovecraft

  2. #72
    nevermore lane777's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by mystify529 View Post
    In my opinion, the delivery is as important as the truth. People can be defensive when the delivery is wrong so what I just said (even if it's the truth) becomes useless. People are more likely to accept the truth if the delivery is acceptable and non-judgmental.
    It's unfortunate that few NT's are aware of this.
    To die would be an awfully big adventure - Peter Pan

    INFJ ~ 4w5 sp/sx ~ RLOAI ~ Inclusion e/w=1/0 (Melancholy Compulsive) Control: e/w=0/6 (Supine) Affection: e/w=4/0 (Phlegmatic Melancholy)

  3. #73
    Senior Member forzen's Avatar
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    I been told i been rude on more than one occasions, but i don't take opinion as facts so their out of luck.
    This post grammatical errors had been intentionally left uncorrected.

  4. #74
    rawr Costrin's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by forzen View Post
    I have been told I have been rude on more than one occasions, but I don't take opinions as facts so they're out of luck.
    l2english, you noob.
    "All humour has a foundation of truth."
    - Costrin

  5. #75
    Senior Member Lurker's Avatar
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    If I'm walking on eggshells with someone, worried about seeming rude, it means I'm not comfortable with that person. So, if I appear rude, it could mean that I like you. (Or not, depends you know)

  6. #76
    Senior Member Anonymous's Avatar
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    I'm polite on my own terms. I express gratitude, practice reciprocity, and all that jazz, but I don't follow the truly stupid/pointless norms such as saying "bless you" when someone sneezes.

  7. #77
    Te > Fi > Ni Shaula's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by juggernaut View Post
    For years my ESFJ mother has been on my case about my lack of consideration for other people's feeling, or put more plainly, my rudeness. I've always known her opinion of me was fairly accurate.

    What I'm wondering is whether rudeness is the true defining feature of the NT personality? For a while I thought it was, perhaps, just an NTJ thing. Then I realized that were just as many, if not more, rude NTPs. After that I considered that the rude/not rude split might be along E/I lines....now I feel fairly confident that the INTs are just as rude as the ENTs. Are NTs, as a group, just rude people?

    Disclaimer: If you think you're a polite NT, please feel free to politely share with us why you think that's the case. I don't want to start another flamewar between the NTs, I just would like to know how other NTs see themselves.
    First off, all types have the potential to be rude. For example, I know an ESTJ who I would consider to be just as rude as another ENTJ I know. But there are probably some types that have a higher likelihood of rudeness versus others. From observational evidence it's not unreasonable to assume that NTs have a higher percentage of lack of consideration due to their rationality as Jennifer pointed out. I think the politeness of an NT depends on whether or not they make the personal decision to moniter/filter their behaviour (for whatever reason).

    Quote Originally Posted by mystify529 View Post
    In my opinion, the delivery is as important as the truth. People can be defensive when the delivery is wrong so what I just said (even if it's the truth) becomes useless. People are more likely to accept the truth if the delivery is acceptable and non-judgmental.
    +1

    By recognising your audience's needs, you are able to deliver them a better product.

    Quote Originally Posted by Jennifer View Post
    I'm pretty polite, by choice, because I don't see the point in burning bridges; I'm cognizant of the social norms and I see it as rational to follow them when I can... but when I was younger I got myself into trouble a bit with the SJ police. And I got chewed out earlier this season by my ISFP roommate who apparently thought NTs were the rudest people around because we operate different in terms of the social norms. But no, when I am rude, it's by choice and not by accident.

    Usually where I get into the most trouble with with my sense of humor. I find social gaffs amusing, and with friends I will sometimes offer the most "inappropriate" response possible, as a joke. However, if someone else witnesses it, they sometimes take it for real and get offended. The other week I even confused my best friend (another INTP, and we do this all the time with each other); he actually couldn't figure out "why I was mad" and apologized to me, but I thought he would have picked up on what I was doing. (Once I told him, he adjusted beautifully and stepped up the sarcasm pace.)
    For these same reasons I choose to be polite.
    Is not to be held accuntable for peeling errors.

  8. #78
    Self sustaining supernova Zoom's Avatar
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    I am not rude, and am in fact one of the more automatically polite people I know, since I will not raise my voice or go down to someone's level when they are angry because I feel like less of myself afterward.

    That's not to say that I am better than those who let it all out, but I cannot hurt someone without feeling pain myself, so I'm very, very 'polite'. Logically, it simply makes things run more smoothly when the social wheels are greased, and people listen much better when their hackles aren't up. Being polite for me is also simply a more efficient way of communicating.

  9. #79
    Member Vildechaya's Avatar
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    Default In Groups, can be the rudest!

    We are not always tactful. But usually do not mean harm. But in groups can be awful. :steam: (personal problem)
    INtP...RCUEI primary I...5w4...INTp... ILI...The Artist Formerly Known As Car!ssa

  10. #80
    Nips away your dignity Fluffywolf's Avatar
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    Many a people in my life has seen and viewed me as rude. I have no doubt about that.

    But it was a lesson they needed to learn.
    ~Self-depricating Megalomaniacal Superwolf

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