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[NT] NTs, just plain rude?

jenocyde

half mystic, half skeksis
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Isn't that a contradiction?

No, not a contradiction because you can be clear headed and angry, just like you can be clear headed and happy or any other emotion. My emotions and thoughts are generally separate. Aren't yours? How does it work for you?

Maybe this is why they say that ENTPs are good in a crisis? It's like the world stops and I just see a, b and c with amazing clarity and have entered some sort of logic zone. At moments of anger or crisis, it's weird, but emotions seem gone - I feel like I've completely stepped out of myself and feel nothing. I don't know how else to explain it, even though that definitely sounds like a contradiction now, lol. Maybe I shouldn't call it anger, but apathy toward my opponent? It's very hard to describe an emotion. It's the feeling that happens when I no longer care about you and no longer want to play nice. It's when I no longer see you as a person. I don't recognize your feelings and I don't recognize my own - I have one goal in mind and will not stop until I complete it. Hmmmm, I'm making myself sound pretty damn scary, hahaha... I'm actually a nice person.

I agree about the Te, very well said.
 

entropie

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No, not a contradiction because you can be clear headed and angry, just like you can be clear headed and happy or any other emotion. My emotions and thoughts are generally separate. Aren't yours? How does it work for you?

But I think, if it doesnt concern yourself, everyone is good at keeping his head and emotions separate.
 

jenocyde

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But I think, if it doesnt concern yourself, everyone is good at keeping his head and emotions separate.

You can't do that when it concerns yourself? Maybe it's just me, who knows...
 

Fiver

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Yes. I think I can be perceived as rude for riding roughshod over someone although I was probably not meaning to. However, I can say, that at the time I am usually much more interested in conveying a concept or idea and have forgotten to be considerate.

I generally don't notice that someone else is being rude. Unless they are self-righteously pointing out that *I* have been being rude. The ill-logic of that will snap me out of my thoughts. I usually become very offended at that point, just as a poster above mentioned.
 

therationaledge

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I am an INTP and I have been called rude, many times, and inconsiderate of feelings, but only from people that I actually care about, I say things BECAUSE i care about them, because I want them to understand the Truth, as opposed to the people I dont give a crap about, who I don't talk to at all, let alone give criticism to, but of course because of their personality they dont understand, but i still love em.
 

Aleph-One

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It isn't the INTP regard for truth that I consider rude; it's their regard for snark.
 

Saslou

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I am an INTP and I have been called rude, many times, and inconsiderate of feelings, but only from people that I actually care about, I say things BECAUSE i care about them, because I want them to understand the Truth.

You want them to understand the Truth. That truth is only based on your perception of things. You may be right in your logic. You may also be wrong. You can give an opinion based on your understanding but to say its the Truth. Hmmmm.

I think this is just a SJ and NT thing possibly.
 
L

Lasting_Pain

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I am an INTP and I have been called rude, many times, and inconsiderate of feelings, but only from people that I actually care about, I say things BECAUSE i care about them, because I want them to understand the Truth, as opposed to the people I dont give a crap about, who I don't talk to at all, let alone give criticism to, but of course because of their personality they dont understand, but i still love em.

I like how he capitalized the T in truth.
 

Erudur

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That's the thing tho, isn't it? What's funny to an NT is perhaps offensive to someone else. We are quite hard to offend. Sometimes, even if I do find something hurtful/offensive, I'll reason myself out of it. I'll conclude that I've no right to feel that way. But most people won't. They always believe their feelings are entirely valid.

It seems to me that "rudeness" is a pretty subjective thing. The things I find rude (e.g. asking too many personal questions, invading my personal space, expecting me to participate in meaningless social rituals, judging my lifestyle, asking stupid questions rather than doing a bit of research) might be considered normal or inoffensive by the prevailing majority so I just have to put up with it.

The things I do that others might consider rude (stuff like being late, forgetting appointments and anniversaries, zoning out, forgetting to return a phone call, sarcastic humour, honest criticism, not smiling or engaging in mundane pleasantries) either don't bother me, or actually appeal when I encounter them in others. Why should I embrace someone else's values about what is acceptable and what isn't?
I don't think we're oblivious to the tone so much as oblivious as to the effect. In order to be aware of that effect you have to be able to empathise. But if what you are saying wouldn't cause you offense if someone said it to you, then empathy doesn't really work. Instead you have to learn a whole set of rules about how other people's minds work. It's like being mildly autistic.

Sometimes frustration and impatience emerge as rudeness/intolerance. We are known for not suffering fools gladly.

(c) is interesting. I hadn't thought of it as being a strategy for dominance. I like to shock (and be shocked, within reason) because I like novelty and hate cliche. Shock tactics can make you think about something in a new way, and I always welcome that. A lot of people don't though.

amen to that.
 
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