For me, I would have to be in love with the person's character - this is a prerequisite. I would never marry someone I didn't love. But in addition, I need to feel that we are on the same path. Love doesn't guarantee understanding or compatibility. If I was in deeply in love with a man, and let's say he was adamant about having 10 children, I would have to pass. I love him enough to let him go and follow that path with someone else, but I love myself enough to not deny my own path. Does that make sense?