I must confess, i have met many an interesting NT. I do find them fascinating and admire their discipline with mind and calm, cool collected thought. I absolutely strive for a mixture of the two elements of both emotional intelligence as well cognitive discipline. There was something that did astound me, and that was not all NT's happen being rational. Rather they can be overrun by emotion and do not possess the mental discipline i usually attribute to them. I have a thought that what intrigues me with the NT is we are, or happen being both intuitives. That is the bonding solution.
Once an INTP has validated their actions, in the best way possible, and found that the person they have affections for is worth it... they begin showing their craziness, which is VERY genuine. If you don't get past the validation stage though you will continue to see the aloof-ness that you speak of, or this is how I perceive it.
For me, it's not about if the person is "worth it" (well, kind of). It's more about if I think they will enjoy/like/appreciate my crazy side. If I'm pretty sure that they won't understand/appreciate my Ne and/or my pondering/thinking side, then I just won't even show it.
But, you're right. If I do decide to show it, then it is very genuine (it's who I am).
NTJ's are the only types that have ever made me feel emo.
ENP's are the only types that have ever made me feel like a sensor.
There are two great days in a person's life - the day we are born and the day we discover why. --William Barclay
I wonder. How often INTx's are right (intuitively speaking) about if the opposite, or rather preferred sex they like, likes them? When you do choose to pursue your interest is it usually a fruitful adventure, or did you misinterpret signs and act on something that the other person didn't see existed?