[INTP] Why do INTPs ignore other people's feelings?

[Grungemouse]

Disregarding feelings as a pertinent source of input is probably both a conscious and unconscious behavior.

Maybe. This is generalizing a tad, but I would assume it would be more of an INTJ trait to ignore other peoples' feelings, because they have already come to a decision and don't want to waste any more time faffing around. As an INTP (or maybe just speaking for myself) when somebody says something on the lines of "Think of the children!" I take the puzzle apart again and try to reassemble it with the new piece. If it doesn't fit, then I disregard it. But I don't automatically dismiss feelings.

 

[Blank]

For me, as an INTP, when I need to cope with my emotions, I do it in an isolated, logical way. When someone else comes to me with their emotions on their sleeve and if they don't want to cope with their emotions logically, I cannot connect, so I'll either stand there or begin smiling, trying not to laugh at the absurdity of the matter because I'm a little crazy and a little too detached from the world.

 

[Riva]

It's the worst when I'm expected to reciprocate emotions in some way. I'm unable to let myself fake them.

The last thing of course I could ever do is reciprocate if I'm not feeling it. it's not just that I don't want to say something that isn't true, it's also that I don't even know HOW to say something that isn't emotionally true, it comes out as a clumsy lie.

this is one significant difference between an INTP and an ENTP.
we could fake and reciprocate just about anything. even feeling(especially feelings)
an ENTP could carry FIRE under water.
feel the MIGHT of ENTPs. it's a kind of magic.

He probably understands feelings because of Ne but then Ti says they make no sense so he is at complete loss with what to about them so will just ignore them.

ENTPs use Ne, Ti too. it must be some other reason. maybe because an INTPs last function (the least used) is Fe. it is the function they are least comfortable with.

 

[groovejet02]

this is one significant difference between an INTP and an ENTP.
we could fake and reciprocate just about anything. even feeling(especially feelings)
an ENTP could carry FIRE under water.
feel the MIGHT of ENTPs. it's a kind of magic.

I would rather be genuine.

 

[Qre:us]

this is one significant difference between an INTP and an ENTP.
we could fake and reciprocate just about anything. even feeling(especially feelings)
an ENTP could carry FIRE under water.
feel the MIGHT of ENTPs. it's a kind of magic.

There is no farting in the pool! Stop blowing so much hot air!

 

[BlackCat]

I don't think INTPs ignore other people's feelings at all, I just think they are not sure about what to do. The IXTPs I know will often help me (in a logical, common sensible way) with my feelings, which is actually nice since it gives me a new perspective on things. The thing I've noticed is that they don't notice your feelings right off the bat.

 

[Riva]

I would rather be genuine.

i am genuine. i can't possibly fake anything like that. hah ha

 

[Riva]

I would rather be genuine.

ohhhhhhhhhhhhHHHHHHHHHHh...............

wait. i completely misunderstood you. what you mean is I'd rather be genuine than fake it?

well true true. it's always good to be genuine. but sometimes you have to lie. especially where feelings are concerned. it doesn't hurt to lie a bit to cheer someone up and make someone feel better, especially if He/she is a friend.

when i fail to fake it i turn back and think why and i always come up with the same answer - i doubted whether it would have worked.

so maybe if you could not fake it, it could be a confidence problem. not a lack of confidence in yourself. more of a lack of confidence to fake something that YOU THINK is unnecessary.

 

[professor goodstain]

Are all of you kiddin? Other peoples feeling are a fraud, a sham, they're fake. People use em as a tool. Always have. Nobodys called the bluff as a collective whole yet because everyone wants to keep that option open. Kinda like earmarks.

 

[lastrailway]

Hi everyone . I have an intp friend , but he is so hard to understand . I found out that he realy understands other people felings , but he he ignores them .
And now i can't figure out why . as i look at him i see big one unsolvable ridle . PS i am esfp. help . thanks in advance

Well, this depends on the person, not on the type.
I don't get other people's feelings, usually, unless if they explain them to me, in which case I do my best to avoid hurting them.

It can be hard for an INTP (or for any person not too much in tune with other people's feelings) because:
-It's hard to tell what exactly are others' feelings at any given time and what influences these feelings: it's so subjective and different for every person that you can be observing people for the rest of your life and never fully get it.
-Most TPs, in my experience, are quite hard to get offended, insulted and/or hurt. So they can't very easily relate to other people who are more sensitive with stuff. It's all too easy to hurt someone and not even realise it, just because you are projecting your feelings to other people and believe noone would ever get hurt with such a thing.
-The general awkwardness of the introvert can also lead to situations where more extroverted people might feel that the introvert ignores their feelings.

 

[Riva]

Are all of you kiddin? Other peoples feeling are a fraud, a sham, they're fake. People use em as a tool. Always have. Nobodys called the bluff as a collective whole yet because everyone wants to keep that option open. Kinda like earmarks.

According to your post I assume (Correction it SAYS) you never 'feel down'.

 

[professor goodstain]

According to your post I assume (Correction it SAYS) you never 'feel down'.

oops. Folks have feelings true but when they show them or express them is when they are used as a tool that can only be deduced for manipulations sake. better?

 

[Riva]

oops. Folks have feelings true but when they show them or express them is when they are used as a tool that can only be deduced for manipulations sake. better?

only for manipulation?
yes feelings could and most of the time are expressed to manipulate. i agree. but is it the only reason?
you read too many novels.

 

[professor goodstain]

only for manipulation?
yes feelings could and most of the time are expressed to manipulate. i agree. but is it the only reason?
you read too many novels.

beats bein around a bunch of babies all over the age of about 15

 

[ajblaise]

this is one significant difference between an INTP and an ENTP.
we could fake and reciprocate just about anything. even feeling(especially feelings)
an ENTP could carry FIRE under water.
feel the MIGHT of ENTPs. it's a kind of magic.

Well, this doesn't bode well for ENTPs at all.

 

[Riva]

this is one significant difference between an INTP and an ENTP.
we could fake and reciprocate just about anything. even feeling(especially feelings)
an ENTP could carry FIRE under water.
feel the MIGHT of ENTPs. it's a kind of magic.

Well, this doesn't bode well for ENTPs at all.

dammit i always get ahead of myself. what i was trying to say was sometimes you have to fake it if you really OR slightly care about a person.
and of course i was being narcissistic a bit.

Read the 4th sentence in introverted intuition. Yes i know that you have read this before. lol
/wiki/Intuitive_Logical_Introvert

it explains a lot doesn't it?

 

[Samvega]

The last thing of course I could ever do is reciprocate if I'm not feeling it. it's not just that I don't want to say something that isn't true, it's also that I don't even know HOW to say something that isn't emotionally true, it comes out as a clumsy lie.

This is central to much of what I'm going to say and I totally agree!

Being an ENTP whose Ti is equal to or higher than his Ne I figure I'll comment and hope to give some insight. I base much of what I say on three very simple things, karma, intentions and is this really how I feel.

Provided the intentions behind my words aren't malicious or intended to be hurtful often times I will go ahead and say them. I will also seemingly not do something nice for somebody if I think there's a Karma issue at play. Additionally I can not say things I don't feel 100% and as a result will sometimes seem kinda odd in an effort to balance these rules.

To touch on that first rule, I think my responsibility for my words ends at my mouth not the other persons ears. Now I use judgement here, I mean, I don't go into McDonalds telling over weight people they're gonna die. If I can spare feelings I will but people that know me know not to ask if they don't wanna hear what I really think.

The Karma thing comes down to something simple. Often times in an effort to help people we're not helping them at all! Classic example would be enabling an alcoholic however if you break that down a little further, it applies to many things that seem like your helping others. So if somebody asks me something I think they need to learn on their own sometimes I won't help and it comes off as cold and mean.

Lastly, since I won't lie about what I think and seemingly cant pretend to feel or think something I don't. If a woman gets a new haircut and asks me what I think, if I don't like it I'm going to be honest. I don't do the whole half compliment hope you didn't notice the other side of that. I will just say "I liked it better before but hell, it's hair, you try something new and if you don't like it it'll grow back". That may seem rude but if you look at and apply my other rules it may give you some understanding.

 

[ajblaise]

dammit i always get ahead of myself. what i was trying to say was sometimes you have to fake it if you really OR slightly care about a person.
and of course i was being narcissistic a bit.

Read the 4th sentence in introverted intuition. Yes i know that you have read this before. lol
/wiki/Intuitive_Logical_Introvert

it explains a lot doesn't it?

What's a good example of a time you had to fake something because you really or slightly cared about a person?

 

[Samvega]

What's a good example of a time you had to fake something because you really or slightly cared about a person?

LOL This made me laugh.

After the first time in bed I'm picturing a guy asking "so, am I the biggest you've ever been with?"

The woman responds "by far" as she's thinking to herself "idiot that is".

 

[Riva]

What's a good example of a time you had to fake something because you really or slightly cared about a person?

After the first time in bed I'm picturing a guy asking "so, am I the biggest you've ever been with?"

The woman responds "by far" as she's thinking to herself "idiot that is".

great!