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[INTP] How to seduce an INTP...

Salomé

meh
Joined
Sep 25, 2008
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10,527
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5w4
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sx/sp
a conceited person with an overinflated sense of their intellect (as an immature INTP is very prone to being) will TELL himself that he's looking for an equal, a mind mate, whilst in reality he doesn't actually really think anyone's worthy of his mind, even passing up people ten times smarter than him without realizing it. And then actually going for someone who really just boosts his ego by making him feel smart, telling himself that they're a mind mate, when it's really clear to onlookers that it's an unequal partnership and one partner, typically the girl, is constantly deferring to the guy's knowledge and "letting" him be right all the time. This is my main point though, how what we think we're going for and what we think are our reasons and what we're doing, and what we actually are, aren't always the same thing.

I think sometimes extraverts are seen as being more prone to this, with introverts being more introspective and therefore more aware of what their subconscious is up to and less prey to it. However, I could equally propose that this might cause a sense of arrogance and complacency about it in the introvert that actually makes them MORE prone to it, cos they're not on guard for it, assuming themselves in control of it, whilst the extravert who knows it's a tendency cos other people tell him all the time, might be more likely to admit it and to be aware when it's happening.
I think you're right - it is much more common for extroverts to behave this way than introverts. INTPs seldom are perceived or perceive themselves at their true level of competence. They are constantly second-guessing themselves. They lack the arrogance and grandiosity of say, ENTPs, in this respect.;)

Yes, but in the process of pillorying INTPs for the alleged failures of that one or those few, you implied (in the sort of haughty manner would-be counselors are prone to do), that seeking a mindmate is necessarily something one-sided and something for the immature, while something else would be better for them, if only they weren't so convinced of their superiority on this. It is my experience (and others', including norepinephrine) that people often attribute higher arrogance for this to INTs than they in fact have, and then go on to hate them for this concluded cockiness. Further, that people should interpret that preference as really seeking someone to fawn over them seems, well, an oddly colored view.
QFT. Many of them are full of self-doubt, even self-hate.
Noone understands us! :cry:

WTF any of this has to do with seduction, IDK....


happy puppy: if he's male and INTP and as socially inept as you say, just be obvious and available, and do ALL the work. And don't expect to have a very good time.
Like I said, ENFPs are weird.
 

substitute

New member
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4,601
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ENTP
I think you're right - it is much more common for extroverts to behave this way than introverts. INTPs seldom are perceived or perceive themselves at their true level of competence. They are constantly second-guessing themselves. They lack the arrogance and grandiosity of say, ENTPs, in this respect.;)

Ahhh, but see, that could act in reverse - the introvert gets complacent about their self-awareness because of all this introspection, and doesn't spend much time around other people to get a variety of feedback, so they've only themselves as judges of how their behaviour looks to others. Whilst the ENTP would be around people a lot more, and getting feedback more often, and so be more aware of how his behaviour affects others and also, less complacent about how well he knows himself, knowing as he might, that introspection's a weakness for him.

I have come across it quite a few times actually, with introverts - you can get a few people making the same complaints about them time and again, but they brush them aside saying "ah you don't KNOW me, I KNOW myself, you just misunderstand", then they carry on with the same insufferable character flaw for years and years, alienating people around them, but always putting it down to flaws in others cos obviously, with all that introspection they did, if they had that flaw they'd know it, right? lol whilst an extravert's perhaps more likely to say "really? is that what I'm like? you know it's not what I was going for but, thanks for the heads up, I can tweak that a bit for next time".

WTF any of this has to do with seduction, IDK....

Well, obviously, it's talking about how you REALLY seduce someone, as opposed to how they THINK they want to be seduced :alttongue:

But really, honestly, I'm just fuckin witchyall, don't be gettin all bent outta shape now :)
 

MacGuffin

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YOU DON'T KNOW ME! YOU DON'T KNOW ME! /Jerry Springer Show
 

Salomé

meh
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I have come across it quite a few times actually, with introverts - you can get a few people making the same complaints about them time and again, but they brush them aside saying "ah you don't KNOW me, I KNOW myself, you just misunderstand", then they carry on with the same insufferable character flaw for years and years, alienating people around them, but always putting it down to flaws in others cos obviously, with all that introspection they did, if they had that flaw they'd know it, right? lol whilst an extravert's perhaps more likely to say "really? is that what I'm like? you know it's not what I was going for but, thanks for the heads up, I can tweak that a bit for next time".
Yeah, not big on the tweaking. Take me or leave me, I ain't changing for noone. Doesn't mean I'm not aware of my faults. I'm profoundly aware of them and nurture them daily.

Thing is extroverts 'tweak' 'cos they need an audience. It's self-interest. They are wired to adapt to their environment. But it's not as if they never manage to alienate people and piss them off.
They also write waaaaay too much.;)
 

INA

now! in shell form
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intp
Uh, pillorying? LOL!! I started out by just kidding around dude, then I just mused, and I didn't imply that anything was necessarily anything, point of fact I was quite careful to NOT imply that, and to state that I was theorizing about what MIGHT happen in SOME cases*. Cos I was asked to explain. Not cos I just turned up with an axe to grind ffs.

I didn't interpret that preference as anything, but merely hypothesized that on some occasions, it might not be what it seems or purports to be in the mind of the preferer, which I thought was a pretty fair enough idea, geez!

:chillpill:

(by the way, I'm not a "would be counsellor"; I'm a qualified one :D

*edit - in fact, I was thinking about what I know for a fact DOES happen in some cases, and musing over how this might correlate to some of the tendencies of less healthy INTP's, as per the theory in the books, like.

Yes it is a pillorying. Counselor, heal thyself.

I

QFT. Many of them are full of self-doubt, even self-hate.
Noone understands us! :cry:
Indeed! There's always self-questioning. Perhaps keeping any opinion unexpressed/unelaborated allows for others' creative attribution of arrogance, especially if we're not fawning over a blowhard more extroverted type like everybody else. It is my experience that remaining uncharmed by jesterish displays earns the scorn of the jester.

you can get a few people making the same complaints about them time and again, but they brush them aside saying "ah you don't KNOW me, I KNOW myself, you just misunderstand", then they carry on with the same insufferable character flaw for years and years, alienating people around them, but always putting it down to flaws in others cos obviously, with all that introspection they did, if they had that flaw they'd know it, right? lol whilst an extravert's perhaps more likely to say "really? is that what I'm like? you know it's not what I was going for but, thanks for the heads up, I can tweak that a bit for next time"..
Extroverts may find other reasons to perpetuate their bad traits (e.g. 1: I'll show 'em, they just don't know what's good for them yet). I must say I haven't seen any greater tendency on the part of extroverts to remedy their flaws.


WTF any of this has to do with seduction, IDK...
A very good question. See my first comment in the thread:

:rofl1: Soooo many h8ers in this place. A whiff of a chance to put INTPs in their place and they go wild. :dont:
 

Kasper

Diabolical
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Just tell him that you're now going out with him. It's simple really.
 

sculpting

New member
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I did consider dropping him an email with instrument specifications, an enduser quick guide and locations for our first date.
 

the state i am in

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table top role playing games
wow (whatever that is)
providing food, sex, shelter, pot and/or a limited travel budget
staying abreast of discussions in contemporary cognitive science
listening to more experimental music than said person
following the scientific method
occasionally (sparingly!) acknowledging said intps ability to successfully perform his/her gender role
 

93JC

Active member
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Dec 17, 2008
Messages
3,989
table top role playing games
Wrong.
wow (whatever that is)
??
providing food, sex, shelter, pot and/or a limited travel budget
I can do without pot.
staying abreast of discussions in contemporary cognitive science
Breasts are good, yes.
listening to more experimental music than said person
Wrong.
following the scientific method
If you're a scientist.
occasionally (sparingly!) acknowledging said intps ability to successfully perform his/her gender role
:confused:
 

BlackCat

Shaman
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State... That isn't real advice. You think ALL INTPs play world of warcraft? REALLY? :rolli: Go try and hit on one with your own advice, see what happens. That's how you verify as to whether you are giving good advice or not.

Cracking the INTP-

Make friends with them. Establish some trust with them. Have interesting conversations with them, make them think. Be open minded, prove that you aren't a narrow minded idiot human being. Relate to their humor and participate. EDIT: Relate to their perspective, relate and take interest in their interests.

As for hitting on an INTP (from my experience, female) start with perhaps some flirty activity or chat and build from there.

If you establish this trust with them then they will like you as a friend, they are open minded and accepting people. Believe me, you will know if they don't like you. With my experience INXX people like to make friends first.

Other than that it's reliant on the person. Do they like you? Do you like them? Do they appear interested? Ask these basic relationship questions to yourself along with all of those other things I mentioned and you should be ok. I'm open to being told I'm wrong, so feel free if I am. Most of my experience is from females, so if it's inaccurate to males then that may explain it.
 

93JC

Active member
Joined
Dec 17, 2008
Messages
3,989
Make friends with them. Establish some trust with them. Have interesting conversations with them, make them think. Be open minded, prove that you aren't a narrow minded idiot human being. Relate to their humor and participate.

:yes:

As for hitting on an INTP (from my experience, female) start with perhaps some flirty activity or chat and build from there.

Works on males too.

If you establish this trust with them then they will like you as a friend, they are open minded and accepting people. Believe me, you will know if they don't like you. With my experience INXX people like to make friends first.

:yes:

Other than that it's reliant on the person. Do they like you? Do you like them? Do they appear interested? Ask these basic relationship questions to yourself along with all of those other things I mentioned and you should be ok.

:yes:

I'm open to being told I'm wrong, so feel free if I am. Most of my experience is from females, so if it's inaccurate to males then that may explain it.

Nope, it's quite accurate.
 

Lady_X

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hey...that's all cool. me too...i don't get these people that hit on you when you're not even friendly with them. it never works.
 

BlackCat

Shaman
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I'm always open to bewbs.

Here you go, I have just the thing for you.

Blue-footed_Booby_Comparison.jpg


A perfect pair of boobs for you.
 

Costrin

rawr
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[YOUTUBE="JFiApf_m4H0"]Highly Relevant Video[/YOUTUBE]
 
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Is this even possible? Do I just tackle them?

All I ever had to do to get INTPs to ask me out was just be myself. I would talk about stuff that I thought was serious, but they always thought I was amusing and fascinating for some reason. I am married to an INTP who also has a lot of ISTP traits - so an IxTP.
 

simulatedworld

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Nov 7, 2008
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If it's a male INTP, and you're a reasonably attractive female, just take off your clothes. It's not like they'll object; they never get laid anyway.
 
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