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  1. #81
    meh Salomé's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by substitute View Post
    a conceited person with an overinflated sense of their intellect (as an immature INTP is very prone to being) will TELL himself that he's looking for an equal, a mind mate, whilst in reality he doesn't actually really think anyone's worthy of his mind, even passing up people ten times smarter than him without realizing it. And then actually going for someone who really just boosts his ego by making him feel smart, telling himself that they're a mind mate, when it's really clear to onlookers that it's an unequal partnership and one partner, typically the girl, is constantly deferring to the guy's knowledge and "letting" him be right all the time. This is my main point though, how what we think we're going for and what we think are our reasons and what we're doing, and what we actually are, aren't always the same thing.

    I think sometimes extraverts are seen as being more prone to this, with introverts being more introspective and therefore more aware of what their subconscious is up to and less prey to it. However, I could equally propose that this might cause a sense of arrogance and complacency about it in the introvert that actually makes them MORE prone to it, cos they're not on guard for it, assuming themselves in control of it, whilst the extravert who knows it's a tendency cos other people tell him all the time, might be more likely to admit it and to be aware when it's happening.
    I think you're right - it is much more common for extroverts to behave this way than introverts. INTPs seldom are perceived or perceive themselves at their true level of competence. They are constantly second-guessing themselves. They lack the arrogance and grandiosity of say, ENTPs, in this respect.

    Quote Originally Posted by InaF3157 View Post
    Yes, but in the process of pillorying INTPs for the alleged failures of that one or those few, you implied (in the sort of haughty manner would-be counselors are prone to do), that seeking a mindmate is necessarily something one-sided and something for the immature, while something else would be better for them, if only they weren't so convinced of their superiority on this. It is my experience (and others', including norepinephrine) that people often attribute higher arrogance for this to INTs than they in fact have, and then go on to hate them for this concluded cockiness. Further, that people should interpret that preference as really seeking someone to fawn over them seems, well, an oddly colored view.
    QFT. Many of them are full of self-doubt, even self-hate.
    Noone understands us!

    WTF any of this has to do with seduction, IDK....


    happy puppy: if he's male and INTP and as socially inept as you say, just be obvious and available, and do ALL the work. And don't expect to have a very good time.
    Like I said, ENFPs are weird.
    Quote Originally Posted by Ivy View Post
    Gosh, the world looks so small from up here on my high horse of menstruation.

  2. #82
    Senior Member substitute's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by bluemonday View Post
    I think you're right - it is much more common for extroverts to behave this way than introverts. INTPs seldom are perceived or perceive themselves at their true level of competence. They are constantly second-guessing themselves. They lack the arrogance and grandiosity of say, ENTPs, in this respect.
    Ahhh, but see, that could act in reverse - the introvert gets complacent about their self-awareness because of all this introspection, and doesn't spend much time around other people to get a variety of feedback, so they've only themselves as judges of how their behaviour looks to others. Whilst the ENTP would be around people a lot more, and getting feedback more often, and so be more aware of how his behaviour affects others and also, less complacent about how well he knows himself, knowing as he might, that introspection's a weakness for him.

    I have come across it quite a few times actually, with introverts - you can get a few people making the same complaints about them time and again, but they brush them aside saying "ah you don't KNOW me, I KNOW myself, you just misunderstand", then they carry on with the same insufferable character flaw for years and years, alienating people around them, but always putting it down to flaws in others cos obviously, with all that introspection they did, if they had that flaw they'd know it, right? lol whilst an extravert's perhaps more likely to say "really? is that what I'm like? you know it's not what I was going for but, thanks for the heads up, I can tweak that a bit for next time".

    WTF any of this has to do with seduction, IDK....
    Well, obviously, it's talking about how you REALLY seduce someone, as opposed to how they THINK they want to be seduced

    But really, honestly, I'm just fuckin witchyall, don't be gettin all bent outta shape now
    Ils se d�merdent, les mecs: trop bon, trop con..................................MY BLOG!

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  3. #83
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    YOU DON'T KNOW ME! YOU DON'T KNOW ME! /Jerry Springer Show

  4. #84
    meh Salomé's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by substitute View Post
    I have come across it quite a few times actually, with introverts - you can get a few people making the same complaints about them time and again, but they brush them aside saying "ah you don't KNOW me, I KNOW myself, you just misunderstand", then they carry on with the same insufferable character flaw for years and years, alienating people around them, but always putting it down to flaws in others cos obviously, with all that introspection they did, if they had that flaw they'd know it, right? lol whilst an extravert's perhaps more likely to say "really? is that what I'm like? you know it's not what I was going for but, thanks for the heads up, I can tweak that a bit for next time".
    Yeah, not big on the tweaking. Take me or leave me, I ain't changing for noone. Doesn't mean I'm not aware of my faults. I'm profoundly aware of them and nurture them daily.

    Thing is extroverts 'tweak' 'cos they need an audience. It's self-interest. They are wired to adapt to their environment. But it's not as if they never manage to alienate people and piss them off.
    They also write waaaaay too much.
    Quote Originally Posted by Ivy View Post
    Gosh, the world looks so small from up here on my high horse of menstruation.

  5. #85
    now! in shell form INA's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by substitute View Post
    Uh, pillorying? LOL!! I started out by just kidding around dude, then I just mused, and I didn't imply that anything was necessarily anything, point of fact I was quite careful to NOT imply that, and to state that I was theorizing about what MIGHT happen in SOME cases*. Cos I was asked to explain. Not cos I just turned up with an axe to grind ffs.

    I didn't interpret that preference as anything, but merely hypothesized that on some occasions, it might not be what it seems or purports to be in the mind of the preferer, which I thought was a pretty fair enough idea, geez!



    (by the way, I'm not a "would be counsellor"; I'm a qualified one

    *edit - in fact, I was thinking about what I know for a fact DOES happen in some cases, and musing over how this might correlate to some of the tendencies of less healthy INTP's, as per the theory in the books, like.
    Yes it is a pillorying. Counselor, heal thyself.

    Quote Originally Posted by bluemonday View Post
    I

    QFT. Many of them are full of self-doubt, even self-hate.
    Noone understands us!
    Indeed! There's always self-questioning. Perhaps keeping any opinion unexpressed/unelaborated allows for others' creative attribution of arrogance, especially if we're not fawning over a blowhard more extroverted type like everybody else. It is my experience that remaining uncharmed by jesterish displays earns the scorn of the jester.

    Quote Originally Posted by substitute View Post
    you can get a few people making the same complaints about them time and again, but they brush them aside saying "ah you don't KNOW me, I KNOW myself, you just misunderstand", then they carry on with the same insufferable character flaw for years and years, alienating people around them, but always putting it down to flaws in others cos obviously, with all that introspection they did, if they had that flaw they'd know it, right? lol whilst an extravert's perhaps more likely to say "really? is that what I'm like? you know it's not what I was going for but, thanks for the heads up, I can tweak that a bit for next time"..
    Extroverts may find other reasons to perpetuate their bad traits (e.g. 1: I'll show 'em, they just don't know what's good for them yet). I must say I haven't seen any greater tendency on the part of extroverts to remedy their flaws.


    Quote Originally Posted by bluemonday View Post
    WTF any of this has to do with seduction, IDK...
    A very good question. See my first comment in the thread:

    Quote Originally Posted by InaF3157 View Post
    Soooo many h8ers in this place. A whiff of a chance to put INTPs in their place and they go wild.
    hoarding time and space
    A single event can awaken within us a stranger totally unknown to us. To live is to be slowly born.
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  6. #86
    Diabolical Kasper's Avatar
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    Just tell him that you're now going out with him. It's simple really.

  7. #87
    Senior Member sculpting's Avatar
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    I did consider dropping him an email with instrument specifications, an enduser quick guide and locations for our first date.

  8. #88
    rawr Costrin's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by happy puppy View Post
    I did consider dropping him an email with instrument specifications, an enduser quick guide and locations for our first date.
    Go for it.
    "All humour has a foundation of truth."
    - Costrin

  9. #89
    Senior Member the state i am in's Avatar
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    table top role playing games
    wow (whatever that is)
    providing food, sex, shelter, pot and/or a limited travel budget
    staying abreast of discussions in contemporary cognitive science
    listening to more experimental music than said person
    following the scientific method
    occasionally (sparingly!) acknowledging said intps ability to successfully perform his/her gender role

  10. #90
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    Quote Originally Posted by the state i am in View Post
    table top role playing games
    Wrong.
    wow (whatever that is)
    ??
    providing food, sex, shelter, pot and/or a limited travel budget
    I can do without pot.
    staying abreast of discussions in contemporary cognitive science
    Breasts are good, yes.
    listening to more experimental music than said person
    Wrong.
    following the scientific method
    If you're a scientist.
    occasionally (sparingly!) acknowledging said intps ability to successfully perform his/her gender role
    :confused:

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