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Thread: NTs and love

  1. #1
    Queen hunter Virtual ghost's Avatar
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    Default NTs and love

    I am wondering if this is a common NT trait.

    When you are in relationship you can never be fully commited.
    You like the person and everything works fine. But you stay somewhat reserved no matter how good it gets. It has nothing to do with fear of commitment it is just that you can't achive emotional intensity.
    So it can happen that you feel stupid since you can't return affection in that moment.
    What can hurt the other person .


    I am sure that this can happen to other groups as well. Since this is probably related with T.



    EDIT: In post 19 there is the explanation about what this is all about
    Last edited by Virtual ghost; 02-22-2009 at 01:18 PM.

  2. #2
    half mystic, half skeksis jenocyde's Avatar
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    It sounds like me. It's hard to fill that black hole of emotion that others seem to need, so I mentally give up and stop trying. Not to say that I am not capable of love, I just can't feel it on cue.

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    I'm a star. Kangirl's Avatar
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    When you are in relationship you can never be fully commited.
    You like the person and everything works fine. But you stay somewhat reserved no matter how good it gets. It has nothing to do with fear of commitment it is just that you can't achive emotional intensity.
    So it can happen that you feel stupid since you can't return affection in that moment.What can hurt the other person
    This isn't me at all. It might have something to do with the fact that I don't date people I'm not *very* interested in (I am talking about casual dating) so it's possible I've just avoided ever being with someone who doesn't do it for me in a big enough way.

    That said, once I am sure about someone, I throw myself 100% body and soul into a relationship. Emotional intensity is not something I have difficulty reaching highs of. Just ask my poor beleaguered INFP.
    "Only an irrational dumbass, would burn Jews." - Jaguar

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    Courage is immortality Valiant's Avatar
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    Nah, I can let someone in completely. Just done it once, and when it ended I was crushed for a couple of years. It helped me develop, though. Would do it again.

    Mightier than the tread of marching armies is the power of an idea whose time has come

  5. #5
    Queen hunter Virtual ghost's Avatar
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    It looks like that this doesn't work for ENTJ.
    But it would be interesting to hear opinions of introverts on this..

  6. #6
    half mystic, half skeksis jenocyde's Avatar
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    I let people in and am devoted, but I just don't feel close to them all the time.

  7. #7
    o edward cullen! Ardea's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kangirl View Post
    This isn't me at all. It might have something to do with the fact that I don't date people I'm not *very* interested in (I am talking about casual dating) so it's possible I've just avoided ever being with someone who doesn't do it for me in a big enough way.

    That said, once I am sure about someone, I throw myself 100% body and soul into a relationship. Emotional intensity is not something I have difficulty reaching highs of. Just ask my poor beleaguered INFP.

  8. #8
    Senior Member ceecee's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Antisocial one View Post
    I am wondering if this is a common NT trait.

    When you are in relationship you can never be fully commited.
    You like the person and everything works fine. But you stay somewhat reserved no matter how good it gets. It has nothing to do with fear of commitment it is just that you can't achive emotional intensity.
    So it can happen that you feel stupid since you can't return affection in that moment.
    What can hurt the other person .


    I am sure that this can happen to other groups as well. Since this is probably related with T.
    I use to be this way. It's much more rare now. I still have my moments where emotional intensity is too intense for me. But not often.
    I like to rock n' roll all night and *part* of every day. I usually have errands... I can only rock from like 1-3.

  9. #9
    Te > Fi > Ni Shaula's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Antisocial one View Post
    I am wondering if this is a common NT trait.

    When you are in relationship you can never be fully commited.
    You like the person and everything works fine. But you stay somewhat reserved no matter how good it gets. It has nothing to do with fear of commitment it is just that you can't achive emotional intensity.
    So it can happen that you feel stupid since you can't return affection in that moment.
    What can hurt the other person .


    I am sure that this can happen to other groups as well. Since this is probably related with T.
    I'm pretty much like this.
    Is not to be held accuntable for peeling errors.

  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by Antisocial one View Post
    When you are in relationship you can never be fully commited.
    You like the person and everything works fine. But you stay somewhat reserved no matter how good it gets. It has nothing to do with fear of commitment it is just that you can't achive emotional intensity.
    So it can happen that you feel stupid since you can't return affection in that moment.
    What can hurt the other person .
    I happen to be quite literally the opposite of all these things.

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