User Tag List

123 Last

Results 1 to 10 of 55

  1. #1
    Shaman BlackCat's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    MBTI
    ESFP
    Enneagram
    9w8 sx/sp
    Socionics
    SEE Fi
    Posts
    7,004

    Default How do you pursue an ENTJ?

    I need some suggestions. I've been talking to someone for a little while that I met over the net that lives nearby. It was on a website for match-making, I've pretty much typed her as ENTJ or possibly ESTJ, but she said she loves deep conversations and theory. So I'm going with ENTJ. She said she went on there for "friends" but also mentioned "meeting someone."

    Any suggestions? Anything would be appreciated.
    () 9w8-3w4-7w6 tritype.

    sCueI (primary Inquisition)

  2. #2
    Senior Member Rangler's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    MBTI
    ENTJ
    Enneagram
    3w8
    Posts
    319

    Default

    Meet her for coffee or drinks. Talk about your ideals, mix in a few personal stories, and tease her a bit. Ask for opinions. Don't be hurt by disagreement, she will disagree just to test you. Keep cool. Appreciate the input even if you don't agree. In fact if you don't agree, say so and why. Find a way to tell her your attracted to her because of her sharp insight.

    If she likes you she will smile and start to tease you back.

    I like INFPs myself so don't be nervous.

    Best of Luck!
    R[a]ngl[e]r

  3. #3
    Seriously Delirious Udog's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2008
    MBTI
    INfp
    Enneagram
    9w1 sp/sx
    Socionics
    INFp None
    Posts
    5,295

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by BlackCat View Post
    Any suggestions? Anything would be appreciated.
    Run away while you still can?

  4. #4
    garbage
    Guest

    Default

    Welp, I'm after an INFP myself. So let's help each other out

    The thing about the dynamic between me and this girl is that there's an obvious attraction to each other's personalities, but there's a bit of a gap. I think I'm used to girls spilling their guts, but with more introverted types, it's difficult to determine what questions to ask or what subjects to bring up to get the best picture of them. Your web profiles can be a huge head-start on that.. you'll have a general picture of each other going in, which might help avoid some of the initial awkwardness.

    (.. at least, it seemed awkward to me that there are actually lulls in our conversations sometimes, but maybe it doesn't bother the INFP as much. I just didn't want to monopolize the conversation, which is a tendency of mine..)

    You can find a way to get her to show some sort of competency in some area. After she brought up the topic of her schoolwork and being worried about an upcoming test, I ended up tutoring her in a subject that I know very well, which made me feel good that I was able to do something for her.

    I, for one, also love what I do, and I've made a significant investment in my career. I can rattle on for hours about my work.. perhaps she's the same way.

    I usually take things very quickly in relationships. With her, I'm taking things much, much more slowly than I usually do, but I feel as though it's going to pay off.

  5. #5
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    MBTI
    INxJ
    Posts
    3,917

    Default

    INFP and ENTJ sounds like the worst possible match.

    First dates should always have the option of being brief and inexpensive. Someone mentioned coffee, if the establishment serves juice and other beverages (in case she's not a caffeine consumer), you should be good. Hopefully, you survive. Good luck.

  6. #6
    Shaman BlackCat's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    MBTI
    ESFP
    Enneagram
    9w8 sx/sp
    Socionics
    SEE Fi
    Posts
    7,004

    Default

    INFP + ENTJ is pretty much amazing, it just requires two people who aren't emotionally retarded. I'd say my worst possible matchup would be an unhealthy ESFJ, followed by an unhealthy ESTJ.

    greed: So you guys want to know about us eh? I usually "spill my guts" when I meet someone I plan on keeping in touch with.
    () 9w8-3w4-7w6 tritype.

    sCueI (primary Inquisition)

  7. #7
    Senior Member Rangler's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    MBTI
    ENTJ
    Enneagram
    3w8
    Posts
    319

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by 01011010 View Post
    INFP and ENTJ sounds like the worst possible match.
    Hahaha. I really do like your directness.
    R[a]ngl[e]r

  8. #8
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    MBTI
    INxJ
    Posts
    3,917

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Rangler View Post
    Hahaha. I really do like your directness.
    Most NTs do. My best friend is an ENTJ, female. We get along like two peas in a pod. Oddly enough, my other closest friend is an INFP.

  9. #9
    garbage
    Guest

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by BlackCat View Post
    INFP + ENTJ is pretty much amazing, it just requires two people who aren't emotionally retarded.
    Yeah. ENTJs have a tendency to be insensitive pricks until they've learned that that doesn't work. If they haven't learned that lesson, there's gonna be problems. But they also tend to learn pretty quickly, but sometimes even that comes too late..


    I hope you don't mind me making my comments in the thread rather than in our little conversation.. I can't help but organize my thoughts in the thread here

    My INFP's cute social awkwardness and shyness are qualities that help form the whole picture of what I'm attracted to in her, somewhat of a detached but anchoring quality. I don't mind making all the moves in this relationship, but I also wouldn't mind if she initiated something. I just don't expect her to, and I'm completely fine with that. As I said, it just means that I have to tone down my usual very direct nature I know the male/female roles are somewhat "reversed" in your case, but personalities are personalities.. the same approach would probably apply.

    I met her at a dance and then asked her out for coffee.. the implication was clear, that I wanted to try to get to know her better because I saw potential. In your case, she might appreciate you just asking her; she very well could initiate from there if you end up setting up the first meeting.

    If she's anything like me.. if she's interested in you or becomes interested in you, she'll take at least a shallow approach at researching you. That might mean looking over your web profile as another tool to get to know you as a person. It doesn't mean that you have to impress her online or put up a lot of detailed information.. but such research just gives us more to work with. We love using resources to their full capacities

    Once I found a profile of hers online, it just allowed me to make more sense of her as a person, and now I know better of what we can talk about which will allow me to make even more sense of her. You all can be pretty mysterious sometimes

    Something else I've noticed is that she tends to apologize a lot. For example, when I tutored her, I ended up finishing up minutes before my class started and she apologized.. from my perspective, I was the one who made the choice to help her and I accepted the paltry consequence of potentially being late for my class. I got a lot of satisfaction out of helping her. I don't find it annoying or anything.. I just felt bad that I made her feel guilty.


    I'm sure I'll come up with some actual questions for you later.. thanks for your offer to help!

    (wow.. lots of smileys..)

  10. #10
    I'm a star. Kangirl's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2008
    MBTI
    ENTJ
    Posts
    1,470

    Default

    INFP + ENTJ is pretty much amazing, it just requires two people who aren't emotionally retarded. I'd say my worst possible matchup would be an unhealthy ESFJ, followed by an unhealthy ESTJ.
    It works for me and my INFP, and I wouldn't describe either of us as 100% emotionally sane.

    Advice for an ENTJ woman would be to be direct and ballsy, but open-minded. I like cockiness in men if they can back it up.
    "Only an irrational dumbass, would burn Jews." - Jaguar

    "please give concise answers in plain English" - request from Provoker

Similar Threads

  1. [ISTP] How do you get an ISTP to fall for you?
    By lecky in forum The SP Arthouse (ESFP, ISFP, ESTP, ISTP)
    Replies: 79
    Last Post: 10-03-2016, 02:09 PM
  2. [MBTItm] How do you spot an ESTJ female?
    By INTJMom in forum The NT Rationale (ENTP, INTP, ENTJ, INTJ)
    Replies: 38
    Last Post: 12-23-2008, 01:27 PM
  3. [NT] How Do you Tell an INTP from an ENTP prof?
    By Usehername in forum The NT Rationale (ENTP, INTP, ENTJ, INTJ)
    Replies: 14
    Last Post: 11-08-2007, 01:51 PM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
Single Sign On provided by vBSSO