User Tag List

123 Last

Results 1 to 10 of 23

  1. #1
    Senior Member Cypocalypse's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    MBTI
    eNtP
    Enneagram
    4w5/
    Posts
    252

    Default Analyzing the social skills of all the introvert types

    I decided to post this on the NT board since this perspective is coming from an INTP.

    Anyway, did any INTP here (without prior knowledge to MBTI) feel that even among the realm of the introverts, you're still a maverick? Like a subset within a subset?

    I think, that I'm among the few INTPs who acknowledge a not-so-good ineterpersonal skills, and is actually trying to do a compromising self-help about that. MBTI helped me a lot in understanding various differences among people, and I specially took note and got a better understanding of how I compare with the other introverts.

    Anyway, some thoughts on how I (an INTP) compare with the other introverts in terms of people-skills.

    ISTJ - Easy to find. There's quite a number of them. Possibly the only introvert archetype I'm having trouble interacting with. My DAD is an ISTJ, though on the more healthy side. Though two ISTJs I've met really irks me.
    These two ISTJ guys are boyfriends to my two female ENFP friends.

    Basically, they have little grasp of the outgoing ENFP life. Gets jealous quite easily. Compared to an INTP, they probably even have more trouble expressing their sentiments. At least the INTP has the vocabulary flair generated by their Ne although it may not necessarily be emotional in nature.

    They will hardly acknowledge their lack of communication skills, and even if they do, they will not act in a compromising manner and would still want to do things in the context of what they see fit. Must be an Alpha Male SJ mentality thing.

    I swear, if they ever piss me off again, I'll flirt with their girlfriend, Ne style. Not that I'm necessarily implying that I'm attracted to my two ENFP friends, but if you're an insecure ISTJ, and you'll ever land yourself with a very attractive, charming ENFP girl, and you'll realize that they're hounded with guy friends, if you're not emotionally secured on that situation, then save yourself the misery and don't get one.

    Though I would like to say that these guys have better work ethics. That's basically it.

    ISFJ - Basically the profile of my girlfriend. Good work ethics, like an ISTJ. Much like an ISTJ, I observed that an ISFJ's circle of friends and acquatances involves people having the same disposition (e.g., corporate status). They will not exert any effort in getting to know people of a different stature (e.g., a different line of career). They get easily intimidated by people they perceive belongs to a higher elite class (ISTJ's also believe in this chain-of-command thing, only that they believe they're somewhere on top), but generally, they have good social skills, not because of actual skills per se, but because xSFJs are easy to find. They're quite a majority.

    ISTP - One of the archetypes I like the most. Sociable, anti-J (just like an INTP). Lives in a very unstructured, improvised life. Not really articulate verbally, but is very very STREET SMART. Seriously, I should hang out with more of them. They're able to make a living in the context of P-structure, able to multitask various unconventional lines of work. If you're an INTP who hates J, for life, you can maybe work on your S to some extent and learn from how ISTP folks do things. They're very good in offering help for mapping out a P oriented career.

    INFP - The one I know is really unhealthy. Basically, he's kinda like an INTP that collapsed under the weight of his sentimental baggage and his Fi fails to provide a cushioning effect. INTP can have that baggage too, but Ti is a great neutralizer. He's smart in the sense that his Ne seems to be always on full throttle, though Fi often leans him towards a more pessimistic outlook. If only developing Ti can eb taught easily, I would sincerely wanna help him.

    ISFP - I don't think I've met one yet.

    INFJ - I know a very handful of them. None of them appears to be attractively charming (physically. Because probably they're not too concerned over their looks), but they have this empathic lure that will probably make you instantly go past beyond your aesthetic desires and easily admire them for what they are. Being an INTP, I think I immediately connect with an INFJ without so much doing a careful thought. They just do connect deeply, without them realizing it.

    INTJ - I know only a single one. Not as strong as me in terms of character. But maybe because he's still young. Strikes me to be a boring and flat as an ISTJ, but because of his Ni, we communicate well. He easily picks up the ideas I'm presenting, though between me and him, he's the more passive talker.

    INTP (my archetype) -- I doubt if I've ever met one in real life. The closest one is probably a charismatic ENTP. After getting myself knowledgeable about MBTI for a few years, I've realized one major thing about INTP and sociability-

    --Ti is probably the most antisocial cognitive process. It makes everybody looks stupid. I still don't know any person in real life who appreciates this. Ti is something I've learned to not assert too much in communication. One has to accept that not everyone can think sensibly, and they shouldn't be corrected all the time, otherwise your Ti will just put you in a bad disposition.

    Ironically, Ne is probably the most charming cognitive process and can even attract the sensors. Ne is the humor generating process, the catalyst for flirtation, and for a perceiver, this function quite possibly assures a more promising career outlook more than Ti can ever do.

    I think for an INTP charisma, depends on how Ne and Ti fare up with each other, and seriously, over the past few months, I've decided to not introvertedly think (Ti) things too much. By doing that, Ne gets to have a better breathing room. Ironically, I realized that one can't strategize in developing Ne. You don't overthink Ne.

    _________________

    Basically, I just wanna know how introverted NTs here deal with their people issues. Or do even try to work at it, at all. Personally, I hardly post lengthy things like this anymore, in concerns of intellectualizing things too much.

  2. #2
    Junior Member
    Join Date
    Feb 2009
    MBTI
    INTP
    Posts
    9

    Default

    I'm an INTP myself so that's what I'll best be able to comment on. I agree with your assertions regarding Ti and Ne, and after years of being socially retarded I've realized that I need to use Ne almost exclusively to deal with other people. I agree that Ti is very antisocial, and if I sit around thinking out the social situations I'm presently participating in I tend to get misunderstood completely because people generally don't react as much to what I'm saying as to how I'm saying it, body language, facial expressions and other clues. For example, several people, women in particular, have actually told me that they find me intimidating - probably because of that focused, unchanging Ti stare. I also failed to realize that people can take all sorts of things personally despite my neutral intentions, so I've learned to send out "acknowledgment signals" and gestures to indicate that no, I don't hate you!

  3. #3
    mod love baby... Lady_X's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    MBTI
    ENFP
    Enneagram
    9w1 sx/so
    Posts
    18,086

    Default

    just read the bit about the istj's and enfp's so far...but i just had to respond with...
    There can’t be any large-scale revolution until there’s a personal revolution, on an individual level. It’s got to happen inside first.
    -Jim Morrison

  4. #4
    mod love baby... Lady_X's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    MBTI
    ENFP
    Enneagram
    9w1 sx/so
    Posts
    18,086

    Default

    interesting...so i thought you might state who you percieved to have the most developed social skills out of the introverts...but you didn't. do you have an opinion on that? i'm guessing infp/isfp...but i don't have enough real life examples to go on.
    There can’t be any large-scale revolution until there’s a personal revolution, on an individual level. It’s got to happen inside first.
    -Jim Morrison

  5. #5
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    MBTI
    INxJ
    Posts
    3,917

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Cypocalypse View Post
    INTJ - Strikes me to be a boring and flat as an ISTJ, but because of his Ni, we communicate well. He easily picks up the ideas I'm presenting, though between me and him, he's the more passive talker.

    Basically, I just wanna know how introverted NTs here deal with their people issues. Or do even try to work at it, at all.
    Eh, we seem to get that wrap. His enneagram might be self preservation. I've noticed instinctual variants seem to play a big role in the 'type' of INTJ.

    It depends. If it's business or meeting with a lover's family, I suck it up. It's strategically to my advantage for those people to like me. So, I can charm. Otherwise, I'm very stoic. I go out of my way to avoid speaking with others on a day to day basis. I've been known to just walk away from strangers without a single word exchanged on my half. I dislike expending unnecessary energy for small talk.

  6. #6
    Senior Member groovejet02's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    MBTI
    INTP
    Enneagram
    5
    Posts
    199

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Cypocalypse View Post

    ... I've realized one major thing about INTP and sociability-

    --Ti is probably the most antisocial cognitive process. It makes everybody looks stupid. I still don't know any person in real life who appreciates this. Ti is something I've learned to not assert too much in communication. One has to accept that not everyone can think sensibly, and they shouldn't be corrected all the time, otherwise your Ti will just put you in a bad disposition.

    Ironically, Ne is probably the most charming cognitive process and can even attract the sensors. Ne is the humor generating process, the catalyst for flirtation, and for a perceiver, this function quite possibly assures a more promising career outlook more than Ti can ever do.

    I think for an INTP charisma, depends on how Ne and Ti fare up with each other, and seriously, over the past few months, I've decided to not introvertedly think (Ti) things too much. By doing that, Ne gets to have a better breathing room. Ironically, I realized that one can't strategize in developing Ne. You don't overthink Ne.
    I agree. My friendships usually involve me being quirky, funny, spontaneous, joking, etc. There are very few people who know of my over-analytical side and my obsession with learning. The moments when I have indeed shown this other side are usually met with discouraging reactions. My mom, for example, thinks I'm being arrogant when I express my views on a subject. My classmates come to me when they have questions with their assignments, but rarely invite me to a party of whatever. The person that I can really be tough-minded with is my INTJ best friend ... we would stay up all night arguing a topic (and even then we would switch gears and be all shallow and easygoing the next day).

    That said, is Ti so repulsing? I agree that Ne is a great function and even I myself enjoy it a lot (when my Ne is in full gear, I don't feel the weight of the world on my shoulders. I am fun and silly). BUT my intellectual life means A LOT to me. If given the opportunity, I would like to one day share it with some people (best friends or partner, etc). Is that impossible? :sad:. Are INTPs Ti function alienating because the world as we know right now is devoid of any rational inquiry, of curiosity?

  7. #7
    Senior Member groovejet02's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    MBTI
    INTP
    Enneagram
    5
    Posts
    199

    Default

    Follow-up: the few people who don't feel hostile to my over-intellectual side tend to admire it but I don't find this comforting. I don't want praises damnit. I want them to critique my arguments, and most of them just don't

    The times when I feel absolutely high is when I learn something by someone or when I'm engaged in a debate with them but these moments are rare.

  8. #8
    garbage
    Guest

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by groovejet02 View Post
    Are INTPs Ti function alienating because the world as we know right now is devoid of any rational inquiry, of curiosity?
    Yes

  9. #9
    Senior Member MrRandom's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2008
    MBTI
    INFJ
    Posts
    151

    Default

    ISFP - I have one as a friend. He's a very lonely dude. He's not able to connect with most people. His old friends seem to abandon him little by little. He desires a lot more social contact, but he seems unable to get it. I've never met any other person so emotional; in fact, that was not a compliment. His world crushes apart every other day and I'm there to pick up the pieces. He takes zero advice from me, but always later admits that I was right (as I was seeing the situation objectively). That pattern is starting to become annoying.

    ISTJ - I know great many of them: acquintances, friends, my best friend, my father, relatives... Their social skills range from very poor to very good. Quite a bunch of different people. They all act very proper in social situations and I personally think they should relax a little bit... one ISTJ friend asks for permission for anything he wants to do in my house. Come on, you don't need to ask your friend for permission to sit down!

    INFJ - I've read quite the opposite to what the thread starter said. The article said that INFJs actually care very much about their looks due to their biggest fear (fear of rejection). Also, I've taken note (possible false one) that many INFJs seem to have slightly special facial features (unrelated to looking good or bad, just slightly different). I believe INFJs are social chameleons, so they can be social and charming if they want to.

    INTJ - I know only one. His social skills are a combination of boredom and negative provocation. At his best behavior, he is just boring. At his worst, he is hurtful and drives people insane (I'm not the only one, and I take pleasure in knowing that...). I do like him, but there's a limit to it... which essentially means I'll never like him more than I currently do.

    --Ti is probably the most antisocial cognitive process. It makes everybody looks stupid. I still don't know any person in real life who appreciates this. Ti is something I've learned to not assert too much in communication. One has to accept that not everyone can think sensibly, and they shouldn't be corrected all the time, otherwise your Ti will just put you in a bad disposition.
    This is very familiar to me. Happens to me all the time. I'm not completely sure how it works, but according to a typology book I'm reading our tertiary function is often used defensively (in an immature way). Ti is my tertiary function... I suppose it could mean I downgrade other people's intelligence when I'm on the defense (or annoyed, etc). For example, I really care about my mom, and I'd like to like her a lot, but it's very difficult, because I'm constantly annoyed by her poor concentration, poor memory and poor reasoning. Interaction with her is so much repetition, repetition, repetition. I can't stand that. It makes it really difficult for me to like her even though I'd like to. Sometimes I lash out at her uncontrollably, and she doesn't have a clue that it's because I'm so frustrated with her poor cognitive abilities. With you dominant Tis this feature is probably constantly on, just in a controlled manner?

  10. #10
    mod love baby... Lady_X's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    MBTI
    ENFP
    Enneagram
    9w1 sx/so
    Posts
    18,086

    Default

    that was interesting to read mr. random.

    the istj i know is very sociably conscious...very proper...always with impeccable manners and appropriate behavior and knows exactly how to behave, exert himself in social situations. he's very introverted but can put on his extravert face because he knows it's what is appropriate.

    the two infj's i know just seem like this deep sea of knowingness...it's a weird exposed feeling but i love it.
    There can’t be any large-scale revolution until there’s a personal revolution, on an individual level. It’s got to happen inside first.
    -Jim Morrison

Similar Threads

  1. Most social of the introverts.
    By Illmatic in forum Myers-Briggs and Jungian Cognitive Functions
    Replies: 42
    Last Post: 08-22-2015, 07:27 AM
  2. What's the most evil of all types????
    By am_i_evil666 in forum Myers-Briggs and Jungian Cognitive Functions
    Replies: 235
    Last Post: 05-16-2015, 04:35 PM
  3. Replies: 36
    Last Post: 10-18-2013, 02:24 AM
  4. The 5 Most Bad Ass Presidents of All-Time
    By swordpath in forum Politics, History, and Current Events
    Replies: 26
    Last Post: 06-05-2008, 03:51 PM
  5. for the benefit of all mankind
    By entropie in forum The Bonfire
    Replies: 5
    Last Post: 05-22-2008, 10:45 AM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
Single Sign On provided by vBSSO