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Thread: NTs and Affection

  1. #21
    Senior Member Array Rangler's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2009


    I like physical affection to a point. I understand how to use it to my advantage, especially if the girl has been on my mind. But, after a while I like to get on with the rest of my day. And, if a girl is unimportant to me, I dislike unnecessary physical affection. I can separate sex from the need for an emotional connection.

    I show affection in a number of ways, mainly through listening to and learning about someone. I like having deeper conversations with people I care about, and I'm a shallow cocky though charming flirt to those that I don't care about. Sometimes I'll buy them a coffee or dinner so we can chat. I give good massages, but don't give a lot of them out. That's how a lover can really tell if I'm falling for them.

  2. #22
    Junior Member Array desiree's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2008


    1. Pattern to showing affection & example:
    Listening to people is my way of showing affection.
    Most people I know usually talk about things that I consider less than penetrating. "Man, you know the whole 9-11 thing? Like, with the towers? You know, sometimes man, I just think there's something they're not telling, a conspiracy or something." Or, "Alan didn't call me back. I dunno why. I wonder if he doesn't like me. Do you think he doesn't like me because he didn't call me back?"
    I usually fake active listening (nod & smile) when I think people are talking to indulge a desire to be heard.
    But when I hear a thought that contains some activity, I show that I am listening by doing the opposite: I just watch and listen, and to keep that person talking, I keep my nods & smiles to the absolute minimum necessary.
    I find this keeps them talking for quite some time (which is kind of disturbing to new acquaintances). I believe they continue to talk instead of trailing off because they have the impression that I actually care.

    2. Length of relationship before showing affection:
    However long it takes them to say something meaningful. I believe some people have meaningful thoughts but say meaningless things because they think it is expected of them, and only share their thoughts when they feel safe from persecution.
    If thou hast T already, first get UT.
    Then get O.
    And so at last get OUT.

  3. #23
    loopy Array Ulaes's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2009


    i tried and failed at answering this question

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