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  1. #31
    No Cigar Litvyak's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by soakupthegame View Post
    I'd much rather be respected than accepted.
    Exactly.

  2. #32
    Member *Strictly_The_Facts*'s Avatar
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    Who gives a **** about social approval when your INTJ? We know people better then most anyway
    If one does not understand a person, one tends to regard him as a fool. -Carl Gustav Jung *I-74* *N-53* *T-95* *J-89*

  3. #33
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    I am social approval...

  4. #34
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    this whole thread really embodies the INTJ style to me..

    few words usually, right to the point...thinking, rational....

    I have an ex SIL and she is the biggest social hermit. I think she would have you believe that she nevers needs others. Sorry, but she is incredibly lousy with people and can't sustain any relationship. Its always on her terms and I gave up a long time ago. She doesn't care, so why should I. Its kind of sad but since its her style, so be it. She does have one "friend", but its more like she is a lapdog that must do her master's bidding. The friend ALWAYS comes to her house, ALWAYS does the work in the "relationship", etc, etc. Now that makes me sick...that woman is barking up the wrong tree to me(i see her as being pooped on constantly), but its her life and she will do what she wants with it.

    As much as I enjoy talking with an INTJ, I generally get the feeling that they think they always know more, and know better than I. I noticed this a long time ago...almost like its what they AREN't saying that is yelling at me, rather than what they are. Even though I take notice of it, it generally doesn't cause me any concern anymore. I figure they are on a journey like the rest of us and they will have what is meant for them, just as myself...

  5. #35
    Wannabe genius Splittet's Avatar
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    In our individualistic culture people underestimate the degree to which they conform, and indeed it seems like INTJs are not an exception, perhaps even among the types who underestimate it the most? Evolution has made humans at their core social beings. Social rejection leads to heightened brain activity in the same areas as physical pain does, and the #1 characteristic of happy people are meaningful and honest relationships with others, and self-esteem correlates highly with how people feel others perceive them. Social approval or disapproval affects INTJs like all types. Maybe INTJs are not as easily depressed by social disapproval as some other types, but it will influence them, if not consciously, then subconsciously, and it will make happiness difficult to achieve.
    "Neither a lofty degree of intelligence nor imagination nor both together go to the making of genius. Love, love, love, that is the soul of genius." - Wolfgang Amad Mozart

  6. #36
    Senior Member INTJMom's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Splittet View Post
    In our individualistic culture people underestimate the degree to which they conform, and indeed it seems like INTJs are not an exception, perhaps even among the types who underestimate it the most? Evolution has made humans at their core social beings. Social rejection leads to heightened brain activity in the same areas as physical pain does, and the #1 characteristic of happy people are meaningful and honest relationships with others, and self-esteem correlates highly with how people feel others perceive them. Social approval or disapproval affects INTJs like all types. Maybe INTJs are not as easily depressed by social disapproval as some other types, but it will influence them, if not consciously, then subconsciously, and it will make happiness difficult to achieve.
    Very well said.
    And I agree.

  7. #37
    Filthy Apes! Kalach's Avatar
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    I called a co-worker a bitch yesterday. She can't be anything other than a royally unbalanced ESFJ and she constantly fucks up meetings with noise, noise, whiny noise--and gets away with it because usually no one can stand up to this noise--so when I heard it starting up at yesterday's meeting, and knew it was going to derail yet another timetabling session, I said, "My God, you're such a bitch! Don't do this!" She's about twenty years older than me.

    Social approval.





    Not that it did any good. The juggernaut looked askance for all of half a second and then kept on rolling, baby.

  8. #38
    Member Sinister Scribe's Avatar
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    I tend to seek approval from a select few people (mostly fellow INTJs and ENTPs, oddly enough). INFs tend to offer their approval whether I want it or not and I don't care about what anyone else thinks.

    I think it's mostly because I've been told so often in the past that I'm a failure at whatever I do because I'm not very social and whatnot that I seek approval. But it's only from certain people... and it's only from the people about whom I care and who generally fall under the NT category.

    I was also raised in an SJ household.
    "Science is the attempt to make the chaotic diversity of our sense-experience correspond to a logically uniform style of thought." -Einstein

    "Fools who wear their hearts proudly on their sleeves, who cannot control their emotions, who wallow in sad memories and allow themselves to be provoked this easily weak people, in other words they stand no chance!" -Snape


    Em. Female INTx and Proud of it. Left-handed Calligrapher. Writer. Scientist. Type Five Enneagram.

  9. #39
    Senior Member something boring's Avatar
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    I think I envy you guys just a little... I certainly admire you.
    "Don�t ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive, and go do it. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive." - Howard Thurman


    [SIGPIC]http://i94.photobucket.com/albums/l110/evillinclinations/fortune45.gif[/SIGPIC]

    ...and yes, I'm still on about that...






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