Things have calmed down lately, but i when my parents and i fight, it seems we both ignore where we're originally coming from and fight because "thats what families do". We love eachother very much, but dont know how to bring out the best in each other.
The parents are both driven by structure, order, cleanliness, rigid schedules and such.
As you can imagine, i'm quite the opposite. First they thought it was because i'm still young and a teenager. Now that i'm 20 and still living with them (working/schooling though), they're confused as to why my disorganization and spontaniety won't go away.
How do i communicate with my parents? Especially my rigid INTJ father who's a TOTAL biological robot. I don't feel as though i know him as a person at all! if he ever needs to talk, it's about grades or work or scheduling. The moment the conversation is turned to things like our lives, our preferences, opinions on random topics.. he exclaims his opinion doesn't matter and 'why are you talking about opinions? its all about FACTS!"
It might have something to do with that we're an immigrant family of russians and my father grew up in a stiff soviet era, buuut i've met plenty of russian men of my dad's age who're plenty open and social.
Again, how do i reach out?!