i think i know what thread you're referring to . I personally don't feel that i was shamelessly selling "free will" by any means necessary. I was merely demonstrating that free will, in a practical sense, exists and anything beyond our perceptions of free will really doesn't affect how we live our lives or our happiness...
You're preaching to the converted, my friend.
Dost thou love Life? Then do not squander Time; for that's the Stuff Life is made of.
-- Benjamin Franklin, Poor Richard's Almanack, June 1746 --
I find that she is very good at telling me when I am thinking too much or getting worked up over nothing as I tend to do in social situations. She keeps me grounded.
This is me (ENTJ) and my boyfriend (INFP). In fact I just finished over an hour of talking him down from a spazz out he was having due to just being stressed out about work/buying a new car/everything. He is extremely prone to getting worked up about things and then simply just losing it, freaking out etc., rather than just trying to take concrete steps to deal with whatever the situation is.
I think there is hope for your match, but both parties need patience and understanding, and this is a lesson I've learned the hard way, and repeatedly. When I'm discussing my relationship with friends I often refer to the line from the childhood rhyme/Longfellow poem 'There Was A Little Girl' - the last 3 lines are: When she was good/ She was very good indeed/ But when she was bad she was horrid. That's my relationship. I spend a lot of time floating around with a stupid grin on my face, and a lot of time fantasizing about different ways in which to torture him to death slowly and get away with it.
So...does this sound fun to you or not? It actually isn't for me - I would prefer a steadier and less rollercoaster-y thing, but I love him and so I deal with the rough bits.
"Only an irrational dumbass, would burn Jews." - Jaguar
"please give concise answers in plain English" - request from Provoker
We are not too rollercoastery. But any of that is undoubtedly caused by my insecurities and social problems. And I feel bad for this. So yeah I suppose we had a more steady sort of interaction. On the other hand I guess that would be less interesting. And whenever we have some sort of problem in our relationship (it was like this when we were just friends as well) it almost always leeds to a very philosophical or intellectual discussion, which both us value greatly. So I guess there is a good side to the ups and downs of the relationship.
I never test as INFP (my T is always pretty high up there) but I could see myself being an F. I think it mainly comes from having a fairly well developed sense of F. I also have some anxiety issues so that leads me to be a lot more sketchy then the average person.
"How dreadful!" cried Lord Henry. "I can stand brute force, but brute reason is quite unbearable. There is something unfair about its use. It is hitting below the intellect." ~ Oscar Wilde - The picture of Dorian Gray
I'm with ISTP, somewhat close to N/S border, and wouldn't recommend a similar pairing. Or, I'll wait and see.
The problems are similar to what you've said of INTP-ENTJ; Here, my ISTP is criticizing me (the ENTJ) on the perfectness of thought and accuracy, even on trivial items. ISTP like to point out mistakes and focus on errors, rather than focusing on performance, and how the errors actually matter on anything done or experienced.
She's easily discouraged, quite unaccommodating, to the point of not working well with many people. She does an attempt at compatibility by shutting down her criticism and speaking in a fake voice, but turns really caustic when she has decided on her opinion.
She's almost unable to do collaborative thinking; rather, she switches between being submissive servant and attempting to dominate, which fails. She's mad for me thinking about many things differently than her; my way is just "wrong", and I'm inconsiderate for having my "offensive" opinion. Not that matter what I *do*, or what *she* does, or does not.
FYI, my opinions are not that offensive really. She'd just wish them to be the same as her's, on many subjects.
She doesn't notice her anger, or other emotions.
I'm hurting her, as I'm rather straightforward, and although I try to be considerate, some times I just aren't. I'm prone to not giving her enough time to think through and finish everything she starts. I press her hard for her not valuing the time sufficiently. I'm often paradoxically unable to relax with her slow speed with most of the stuff, as I'm afraid of missing to everything I want to do.
As opposed, she doesn't have many plans. She's excited about getting some more education now, and she's done a lot to it, so It's not that she were totally lazy or anything.
Still, the different pace, and the wildly, completely different priorities for "working my own pace" and "getting things done", "doing" vs "thinking", etc.. make the life quite difficult.
I'm not sure if her financial difficulties stress her so as to make her act that way.
In any case, I want much improvement on our relationship.
I'm also disappointed in her often straightforward way of thinking, when she has thought to covered "everything important": she's not very inventive, but I can blame S for this. She complains a lot to me for not having some S details in my life in a most practical or aesthetic manner. But, these are both S issues. There are already enough reasons for trouble on our I/E and J/P differences.
I'm most disappointed at her for not really being actually practical with her thinking, i.e. making something work and getting some good things for herself. She's almost like idealistically inclined to impractical philosophies and ways of thinking, although she doesn't admit it. Yes, she's still ST and not NF. It's different in manner to NF ideology; her ideology follows from some desired truth, i.e. this would be good, if true, so this kind of thing must be forced, and things has to be done in accordance with this imagined, desirable view. Lack of N makes her unable to consider all the aspects tho, and lack of J makes her extremely undisciplined in double-checking all her ideas to see if they can actually be made into effect. Uhh.
I think it would run smoothly, and the ENTJ would kind of whip me into shape. But I don't think I would really be into them and like them enough to want to be around them so much. That's just judging from the ENTJs I've known.
Funny how frequently this pairing shows up, despite it's "doomedness". I really like INTPs, but they're a lot of work in a romantic relationship. More work than I, personally, am capable of doing. I love having them around, but I don't know how seriously I could take one. I've had a few interesting starts with INTPs, but I just don't have the energy/interest to take the lead. This probably isn't as big an issue for male ENTJs. Of course, for me, it could also be the lack of real E. I just don't want to have to commandeer the entire relationship on my own. It feels too much like you're dragging along someone who doesn't really want to be there.
What are your guys thoughts on an INTP-ENTJ relationship. Specifically between a male INTP and female ENTJ.
i think this would work pretty well. especially if it is ENTJ male and INTP female.
even ENTJ female with a INTP male would work but i think the girl would get a little frustrated when the INTP male starts to ignore him a bit. i think females as females would like a bit more emotional attention from their loved ones a bit more than the males.(no i am not saying that guys don't need emotional attention).
on the otherhand the ENTJ male would be quite content with a INTP female who doesn't always seek emotional opennes(whatever you call it). they would be quite content to know that there is a woman who loves him waiting for him when he comes back home.(hot woman)