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  1. #1
    Senior Member mwv6r's Avatar
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    Default curious about ENTJ females

    Hello, I hope this is the correct place for this thread.

    I'm starting to become friends with a girl whose personality I find very intriguing -- very intelligent, very confident, very funny in a dry way. I knew she was an NT of some sort but couldn't figure out which type, but after talking with her last night I learned that she's an ENTJ. I'd never met a female of her type before and can't find much info online about female ENTJs. What strikes me most is she seems more playful than a lot of the online descriptions of ENTJs seem to suggest, or maybe that is just because I'm seeing her outside a work setting. Could anyone fill me in on common characteristics of female ENTJs? What makes them tick, how they like to have fun, sense of humor, behavior in friendships and relationships, etc. Thanks!

  2. #2
    Nerd King Usurper Edgar's Avatar
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    Well I hope you enjoy being the bitch in the relationship, that's I all I have to say when it comes to ENTJ women.

  3. #3
    Senior Member mwv6r's Avatar
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    Haha, I'm not trying to date her, we're both girls, met through our boyfriends. I just think she's really cool and was curious to learn more about ENTJ women. Her boyfriend actually is an INFJ too and I would say that she's in charge of things between them, but from the outside at least it seems to work for them...

  4. #4
    HUZZAH! Bougal's Avatar
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    I really don't know why people think we are bitches. We do tend to be take charge and all of that fun stuff, but all of the ones I have met are very fun and bubbly. If we perceive that you are worthy of our friendship then we work really hard at the relationship, and we are very fun and random. Even if we don't like someone we tend to be civil. From all of the others I have met, we all agree that meanness is simply a lack of self control. We are driven over the edge by incompetence and inefficiency. We also hate when people underestimate us, or when we are put into a position where we are being condescended too. In these situations, we seem to try too hard to prove our competence. As long as you do what you say you are going to do, and you offer something we think is interesting, youíre good with us. We really like people that are good conversationalist. I know that I have one group of friends where they are all Ns and we just talk, and I have another of mostly SFs where we do a lot of activities. We also really enjoy learning, and when we find someone with an interesting pool of knowledge, we like to pick their brain and learn from them. I know that I am always looking to learn, and I bet most other ENTJs are the same.

    I actually have a very good friend that is an INFJ. Ask anymore questions you might have, and Iíll try to answer them. I hope this has been helpful.


    Ne > Ni > Ti > Fi > Te> Fe > Se > Si

  5. #5
    Per Ardua Metamorphosis's Avatar
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    I was actually very surprised by how friendly/outgoing/bubbly some female ENTJs are. As opposed to male ENTJs, their controlling tendencies tend to be much more subtle...like a foundation, rather than a frequent occurrence.
    "You will always be fond of me. I represent to you all the sins you never had the courage to commit."

    Reason is, and ought only to be the slave of the passions, and can never pretend to any other office
    than to serve and obey them. - David Hume

  6. #6
    ThatGirl
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    Quote Originally Posted by Metamorphosis View Post
    I was actually very surprised by how friendly/outgoing/bubbly some female ENTJs are. As opposed to male ENTJs, their controlling tendencies tend to be much more subtle...like a foundation, rather than a frequent occurrence.
    LOL

  7. #7
    HUZZAH! Bougal's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Metamorphosis View Post
    I was actually very surprised by how friendly/outgoing/bubbly some female ENTJs are. As opposed to male ENTJs, their controlling tendencies tend to be much more subtle...like a foundation, rather than a frequent occurrence.
    Well said, and very true.


    Ne > Ni > Ti > Fi > Te> Fe > Se > Si

  8. #8
    Nerd King Usurper Edgar's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Metamorphosis View Post
    I was actually very surprised by how friendly/outgoing/bubbly some female ENTJs are. As opposed to male ENTJs, their controlling tendencies tend to be much more subtle...like a foundation, rather than a frequent occurrence.
    I believe the word is "facade"

  9. #9
    Senior Member mwv6r's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bougal View Post
    Ask anymore questions you might have, and Iíll try to answer them. I hope this has been helpful.
    Thank you, this is helpful :o)

    I'm interested in the difference between male and female ENTJs. The ENTJ girl I'm referring to surprised me because all the male ENTJs I'd met before (and admittedly that wasn't all that many) were intelligent and very interesting to talk with, yet they came across a tad nerdy/socially awkward (sorry if I'm offending any male ENTJs here!), whereas she was very smooth socially. So I was curious about ya'll's experiences of how gender differences affect the ENTJ personality type. (It may very well be that I just didn't have an adequate sample of male ENTJs before.)

    I found Metamorphosis' comment about female ENTJ's subtle control very interesting. I actually wasn't sure this girl was a judger at first because she seems so laidback, but now looking back over situations I observed between her and her boyfriend I think maybe she was asserting power with him but in a very low-key way. Definitely very differently from the way ESTJs (male or female) assert power -- I often find they'll just about hit you over the head in their attempts to control.

    Also curious about what types ENTJs gravitate towards both in friendships and romantically. Some websites I read suggested that an ENTJ's ideal match is an INFP/ISFP, while others said it's an INTP/ISTP because ENTJ's may become irritated with a feeling-type mate. I know to take those websites with a grain of salt (they all say that I shouldn't be with my partner when I'm very happy), but I was curious what ya'll think.

    Female ENTJs seem like a really cool type. I had a close INTJ girlfriend in college and it's interesting to see extraverted NTJs in action. I want to get to know her better but I'm a little intimidated by her to be honest so that's part of what's motivating all my questions about her type, lol.

  10. #10
    Per Ardua Metamorphosis's Avatar
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    The thing about ENTJs is that they seem very intimidating because their method of communication is very different from every other type, when in truth, it should be one of the least intimidating types, because you simply have very little to worry about. They'll tell you exactly what you want to know, as long as it has nothing to do with feelings. In fact, they'll frequently give the impression that they're giving you intimate details about themselves like it's nothing...which is actually a subtle way of acquiring power, whether intentional or not.

    Directness comes across as intimidation simply because we aren't accustomed to it. I'm not saying that they don't try to control, because in my experience they do, frequently...but saying "This is what I think" or "This is what I want" isn't necessarily to say that they won't entertain options. It just means that they are expressing themselves openly to you without any of the BS and you can take it or leave it.
    "You will always be fond of me. I represent to you all the sins you never had the courage to commit."

    Reason is, and ought only to be the slave of the passions, and can never pretend to any other office
    than to serve and obey them. - David Hume

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