^^ oh just to clarify...i'm not mad. i was throwin a bit of attitude because disregard kinda said the people who said they didn't were full of it...and i gotta defend peoples rights to feel however they feel...it's just an incredibly annoying habit i have...i don't personally care one way or another.
yeah it's alright we understand, one can see something he wants neutraly without puting any emotion into it.
I kind of do that, things are just elements I connect with concepts and so on, but why obsess about it. It serves no purpose what so ever.
But I do get not everybody thinks like me, so I'm not saying it's wrong.
For example I am utterly unable to keep an ordered room\desk, to study for that exam, that's now in 5hours (maths).
But it's all part of who I am, and i'm sure a more orderly mind couldn't come up with new ideas and so on all the time , "in the purest entp fashion."
I don't think it's wrong either. But it's one of the "qualities" I'm most proud in myself, I must say
Wow.. I'm glad for the Feelers' perspective on this thread!
Me? I do get envious on occasion, just like I sometimes get angry or sad. Like any negative emotion, I accept it, let it pass, try to figure out what it signaled, and move to correct it.
In the case of envy, it might mean that I desire to acquire a skill that someone else has. I then let the emotion go, then I try to accept or resolve the situation. I'll ask the person for pointers, do research, practice, and so on. The emotion itself doesn't last for very long (less than a minute, tops), but it signaled yet another drive in me.
To me, emotions are just that.. signals. Just like physical pain is a signal. Some people might feel certain emotions strongly, some people not at all. Although, my ENFJ friend keeps telling me to stop suppressing emotions.. ones that I don't actually feel..
Seems like a waste of energy. Maybe it motivates some people, but I can see it holding others back as well.
You're right, I think. Envy and jealousy can be largely debilatating when a person focuses on what he or she lacks so much that s/he falls into self-pity.
I often compare myself to others, which often leads to long bouts of feelings of worthlessness and shame. So, in a sense, I feel jealousy because that other person's success is a direct assailant on my own self-worth. At that point, I begin to envy specific attributes of a person (looks, certain personality traits, etc.)
I guess these feelings largely stem from a desire to be as important desirable, accepted by other (extraverted feeling, perhaps.) In my opinion, as long someone makes the decision to take practical steps to achieving what s/he thinks is missing, envy and jealousy can be dealt with without letting them take too much toll on a person's self-esteem.
"Why had he never appreciated what a miracle he was, brain and nerve and bounding heart?"
<strikethrough>Jealousy/envy was probably one of the earliest strong emotions I had as a child.
My parents used manipulative preferential treatment of a sibling (and none too subtly either. I remember my Dad saying things like 'Now I don't love you. I'll love (insert name of random kid friend)', and I would be mutely outraged because I didn't know how to put anything in words) as punishment.
Plus I always had difficulty tattling on my brother (I would sometimes take the fall for him because I could imagine hating being in his shoes), while he hardly resisted a chance.
Now I still get jealous as a reflex when I feel overlooked or ignored, but I normally get over it by exerting some Te, and feeling some Fi inner happiness.
More insidiously, I have a very intense feeling of guilt whenever I've been joking around with a male friend or something, and move away, and then realise this INTJ I have a thing with was near. I don't know if it's because I'm hyper-vigilant about inciting jealousy, or that I sub-consciously try to induce jealousy, and then feel guilty about my motives. I don't know if joking around with someone else normally causes jealousy but I don't seem to have that relaxed mutual entertaining thing going on with the INTJ (with us it's more like mutual snarky comments), so yeah.</strikethrough>
*oops, now i realise this is in the NT rationale.
and i'm not an NT.shall take it out and post it on the other page i was looking at.
I would think it's healthier to admit to jealousy and be comfortable with experiencing that emotion on occasion than to suppress the acknowledgment of our jealousy and to force a self-assured smile like everyone else and say "I'm not ever a jealous person in my romantic relationships, because I'm above that."