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  1. #1
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    Question INTJs & Affection

    Okay, a question for the INTJ's ... how do you show affection to someone you are really interested in romantically? Gestures? Do you do the opposite of what you feel?
    Om–ba–ara–minaya–sabaha
    4w5 sx/so/sp

  2. #2
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    2 INTJs in leuve:


  3. #3
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    This thread = Apocalypse

    If I'm lucky enough to have feelings at all, I certainly don't ignore them. Much less do the opposite. Seems inefficient as a strategy.

    I don't care for physical touching or verbalizing affection. I will be helpful though. Fix their computer, clean it etc. Make sure the date activities include a personal element for the recipient. I mentally note anything that is important or loved by them, and give appropriate but non-conventional gifts.

  4. #4
    Per Ardua Metamorphosis's Avatar
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    It's entirely different between if I want them or if I already have them.
    "You will always be fond of me. I represent to you all the sins you never had the courage to commit."

    Reason is, and ought only to be the slave of the passions, and can never pretend to any other office
    than to serve and obey them. - David Hume

  5. #5
    Senior Member creativeRhino's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by 01011010 View Post
    This thread = Apocalypse

    If I'm lucky enough to have feelings at all, I certainly don't ignore them. Much less do the opposite. Seems inefficient as a strategy.

    I don't care for physical touching or verbalizing affection. I will be helpful though. Fix their computer, clean it etc. Make sure the date activities include a personal element for the recipient. I mentally note anything that is important or loved by them, and give appropriate but non-conventional gifts.
    that kind of sounds like me.

    Being helpful in an intelligent/practical way, not random or mushy.

  6. #6
    ish red no longer *sad* nightning's Avatar
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    +1 for the being helpful part. I'm rarely verbal but physical touch also works for me.

  7. #7
    Per Ardua Metamorphosis's Avatar
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    Yeah, physical is much easier to do than verbal for me, but that's only once I already have them.
    "You will always be fond of me. I represent to you all the sins you never had the courage to commit."

    Reason is, and ought only to be the slave of the passions, and can never pretend to any other office
    than to serve and obey them. - David Hume

  8. #8
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    Default INTJ's and Affection

    Quote Originally Posted by Metamorphosis View Post
    It's entirely different between if I want them or if I already have them.
    How so?
    It's a blessing...and a curse.

    Originally Posted by Anja
    I don't have room for shame in my life.

    INFJ, 4w5 sx

  9. #9
    Per Ardua Metamorphosis's Avatar
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    Besides being more physical, I'll be much more likely to show affection in general once I have them. Before that, helpfulness like binary pointed out or random conversation that is basically about mundane things (my attempt at small talk).
    "You will always be fond of me. I represent to you all the sins you never had the courage to commit."

    Reason is, and ought only to be the slave of the passions, and can never pretend to any other office
    than to serve and obey them. - David Hume

  10. #10
    Member The Pascuzzi's Avatar
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    for me, it's all in the actions. words and gestures are nice, but i feel most fulfilled when i can make something work for them that wasn't working before, or at least be able to offer some really valuable adivce.

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