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  1. #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by The Pascuzzi View Post
    for me, it's all in the actions. words and gestures are nice, but i feel most fulfilled when i can make something work for them that wasn't working before, or at least be able to offer some really valuable adivce.
    Problem solver, eh. Same here, but I do that for anyone that's close to me, not just intimate partners.

    Being helpful seems to be the majority. I think the fact that we take an interest and go out of our way to do something for another is the best indication.

  2. #12
    Senior Thread Terminator Aerithria's Avatar
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    Being helpful and attentive, as everyone else mentionned, sarcastically making fun of them less -- or more, depending on the person, actually calling them on the phone every once in a while (I never call people myself)... Of course, when I'm actually with them, I'm slightly more affectionnate.
    [insert funny quote/saying/etc.]

  3. #13
    Senior Member ed111's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by soleil View Post
    Okay, a question for the INTJ's ... how do you show affection to someone you are really interested in romantically? Gestures? Do you do the opposite of what you feel?
    If I'm really into someone I tend to become obsessed by that person in the sense that I will think about them all the time.

    I will tend to look at them a lot, but will get shy if they look at me. My method of flirting is to joke around with that person. I'd be hoping to get them into a one to one conversation and will suddenly change from my normal demeanour (e.g. critical, flippant, distant). I would not be at all critical (except jokingly). In that one to one situation nothing else in the world would matter to me other than that person.

  4. #14
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    There is this guy I was seeing/talking to (long distance) for about 3 years. We still talk here & there. He lives in Canada & I live in the states. He comes around my parts maybe twice a year, but he keeps in touch by phone (he does most of the calling btw). He has a fear of commitment & likes his own space, but makes little comments like "Maybe we'll be married 10 years from now" & "Just because I don't call often doesn't mean I don't think of you", etc.. I just ignore it & not take it seriously. When we are around each other, he stares into my eyes a lot & gets a little territorial when we are outside saying I'm his girlfriend & bringing me around people he knows. I usually just laugh & keep it moving. He has told me he has cut people out of his life particularly females very quickly. His approach comes off very cold, but I can see past it & see that he's a decent person. He has called just to ask how I'm doing, what I'm reading, etc. etc. It's just a weird thing because I never met an INTJ guy before & it's so different from other interactions I've had or have now. I must admit because of him I learned to keep my distance from people more than I already was. We have this strong, powerful kinetic energy/chemistry, but we never talk about it. In the past, he said we were kindred spirits. According to him, I'm too introverted & need to put myself out there more, HA! coming from an INTJ to an ENFP. I really don't know exactly what I'm trying to get out of this topic...so, I guess my question would be, what the heck is this? I have never been in this predicament before. What does he want? I would love to just be apart of his life no matter what. He's a unique person who I respect & feel a certain level of connection with.
    Ombaaraminayasabaha
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  5. #15
    IRL is not real Cimarron's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Aerithria View Post
    ...sarcastically making fun of them less -- or more, depending on the person...
    Now about this comment, which was probably meant to be minor: How does this dynamic work? Why might you decide to use a little more playful sarcasm? Is it something like "it's cute to see that other person get flustered," or is it more like "it's fun to engage in some light intellectual games," or is it a mix of both?
    You can't spell "justice" without ISTJ.

  6. #16
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    Quote Originally Posted by ed111 View Post
    If I'm really into someone I tend to become obsessed by that person in the sense that I will think about them all the time.

    I will tend to look at them a lot, but will get shy if they look at me. My method of flirting is to joke around with that person. I'd be hoping to get them into a one to one conversation and will suddenly change from my normal demeanour (e.g. critical, flippant, distant). I would not be at all critical (except jokingly). In that one to one situation nothing else in the world would matter to me other than that person.

    He jokes around being very sarcastic so, I just play right back. It's all mental games! I read somewhere from an INTJ that they will flirt with everyone (including their friends or other women), but not the person they are "interested" in. Is this a common thing INTJ's do? Just wondering.
    Ombaaraminayasabaha
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  7. #17
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    Quote Originally Posted by soleil View Post

    He jokes around being very sarcastic so, I just play right back. It's all mental games! I read somewhere from an INTJ that they will flirt with everyone (including their friends or other women), but not the person they are "interested" in. Is this a common thing INTJ's do? Just wondering.
    INTJs flirt?

  8. #18
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    Quote Originally Posted by 01011010 View Post
    INTJs flirt?
    Get playful with?
    Ombaaraminayasabaha
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  9. #19
    にゃん runvardh's Avatar
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    Sorry 01011010, but this is actually a good example.
    Dreams are best served manifest and tangible.

    INFP, 6w7, IEI

    I accept no responsibility, what so ever, for the fact that I exist; I do, however, accept full responsibility for what I do while I exist.

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  10. #20
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    Quote Originally Posted by runvardh View Post
    Sorry 01011010, but this is actually a good example.
    Quick, hide it. Actually, I was joking with her.

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