User Tag List

First 1234 Last

Results 11 to 20 of 91

  1. #11
    ish red no longer *sad* nightning's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    MBTI
    INfj
    Posts
    3,741

    Default

    Assume everything is banter unless it's repeated with increasing intensity per exchange.

  2. #12
    Banned
    Join Date
    Jul 2008
    MBTI
    type
    Posts
    9,100

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by erinavery View Post
    and they're adept in the art of being feisty w/o being hurtful...some people try but they just come off like an ass...you know?
    Yeah whatever.

  3. #13
    Queen hunter Virtual ghost's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    Posts
    8,694

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by nightning View Post
    Assume everything is banter unless it's repeated with increasing intensity per exchange.
    It can be, but in many cases this can only mean that the person enjoys exchange of an arguments in some cases it can even be invitation for a small dabate on the subject. What isn't exactly in "I don't like to spend time with you" category.

  4. #14
    meh Salomé's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    MBTI
    INTP
    Enneagram
    5w4 sx/sp
    Posts
    10,540

    Default

    "many a true word is spoken in jest"

    Can you explain why someone you don't know has the power to hurt you?
    Irritate, maybe, but hurt? Why?
    Quote Originally Posted by Ivy View Post
    Gosh, the world looks so small from up here on my high horse of menstruation.

  5. #15
    mod love baby... Lady_X's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    MBTI
    ENFP
    Enneagram
    9w1 sx/so
    Posts
    18,086

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Jack Flak View Post
    Yeah whatever.
    or....maybe not...


    haha
    There can’t be any large-scale revolution until there’s a personal revolution, on an individual level. It’s got to happen inside first.
    -Jim Morrison

  6. #16
    The High Priestess Amargith's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    MBTI
    Enfp
    Enneagram
    497 sx/so
    Socionics
    IEE Fi
    Posts
    14,658

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by bluemonday View Post
    "many a true word is spoken in jest"

    Can you explain why someone you don't know has the power to hurt you?
    Irritate, maybe, but hurt? Why?
    I guess coz I give everyone the benefit of the doubt and easily trust people. I let people in easily. And I mean well. It hurts when those intentions are rejected, I guess. Makes me automatically go: 'What did I do wrong?'
    ★ڿڰۣ✿ℒoѵℯ✿ڿڰۣ★





    "Harm none, do as ye will”

  7. #17
    Senior Member Anja's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2008
    MBTI
    INFP
    Posts
    2,967

    Default

    It's difficult and sometimes costly to make assumptions of others' intentions. I usually act upon the words, not what I think is under them. This gives people the respect they are due of not misrepresenting themselves. In other words, unless something is blatantly an awkward attempt at humor, I will take it at face value the first time. The old "say what you mean; mean what you say" stuff.

    If their judgement is poor and they are saying things which they don't mean or which don't truly reflect their character, then they are the ones with the problem. If their timing at humor, potentially hurtful though it may be, is off time will tell whether they mean harm or not.

    To address Blue, I think people who deliberately mean harm or make a habit to attempt to poke at someone's tender spots, are acting out of unhealed past hurts. And as you intimate, it indirectly has nothing to do with you.

    Why does it hurt coming from a stranger? For the same reason they are doing it - something in our past is unhealed and it has just been engaged.

    In a sense it is two children acting out something from their pasts. If we keep it in the present it can sometimes be untangled without even addressing the issues.

    For instance: "Your sense of humor, or your comment, stings." will let the other person know we've gotten entangled. Keeping the observation in the present, free of judgement and clean of junk helps.

    What the person responds will help you to understand whether it was intentional or not.
    "No ray of sunshine is ever lost, but the green which it awakes into existence needs time to sprout, and it is not always granted to the sower to see the harvest. All work that is worth anything is done in faith." - Albert Schweitzer

  8. #18
    Queen hunter Virtual ghost's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    Posts
    8,694

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Amargith View Post
    I guess coz I give everyone the benefit of the doubt and easily trust people. I let people in easily. And I mean well. It hurts when those intentions are rejected, I guess. Makes me automatically go: 'What did I do wrong?'
    Being too open and friendly can a serious turn off for an NT.

  9. #19
    Senior Member Simplexity's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2008
    MBTI
    INTP
    Posts
    1,741

    Default

    Harmless banter?

    I don't engage in that sort. I'm much too caustic and serious, every word spoken is meant to penetrate defenses. No matter how well guarded. My intentions often belie my childish nature, especially in "intimate, or personal" matters. Be forewarned I am obviously very perverted.
    My cold, snide, intellectual life is just a veneer, behind which lies the plywood of loneliness.

  10. #20
    meh Salomé's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    MBTI
    INTP
    Enneagram
    5w4 sx/sp
    Posts
    10,540

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Amargith View Post
    I guess coz I give everyone the benefit of the doubt and easily trust people. I let people in easily. And I mean well. It hurts when those intentions are rejected, I guess. Makes me automatically go: 'What did I do wrong?'
    Yeah. I can see how that would suck.
    There are advantages to being a heartless nincompoop.

    NTs tend to be sticks and stones kinda people. We're irreverent and perverse. We'll insult you in jest or in earnest - but we mean no harm, as a rule. We're only ever really nice to people we can't stand. Like SJs.
    Quote Originally Posted by Ivy View Post
    Gosh, the world looks so small from up here on my high horse of menstruation.

Similar Threads

  1. What problems occupy your mind?
    By ptgatsby in forum The Bonfire
    Replies: 42
    Last Post: 02-23-2011, 04:18 PM
  2. What blows your mind?
    By disregard in forum The Bonfire
    Replies: 53
    Last Post: 12-17-2008, 09:42 PM
  3. [ENTP] ENTPs, what's on your mind?
    By Terian in forum The NT Rationale (ENTP, INTP, ENTJ, INTJ)
    Replies: 64
    Last Post: 09-19-2008, 01:48 AM
  4. What boggles your mind?
    By prplchknz in forum Philosophy and Spirituality
    Replies: 37
    Last Post: 08-13-2008, 05:55 PM
  5. What stimulates your mind...
    By The_Liquid_Laser in forum Myers-Briggs and Jungian Cognitive Functions
    Replies: 3
    Last Post: 06-24-2008, 02:30 PM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
Single Sign On provided by vBSSO