Provoker - you said:
On the other hand, if I leave it on I end up giving lectures about things and then, if interrupted or if I see their eyes start to wander, I may get really irritable. In recent years, I've really developed an encyclopedic mind and a textbook-like approach to phenomena. It seems to me that I am more intellectual than witty which seems to work to my disadvantage in light-hearted social environments.
First of all, are you sure you're not overstating the degree to which you approach everything in a logical manner? Your description sounds very robotic to me, and I don't think that real people are actually like that. Not that I know you better than you know yourself - but the above just seems overstated to me (or maybe lacking in other descriptions of yourself that would counterbalance it).
As for lecturing, I know a person who does that - it's really annoying. Sorry. :sad: It's not your intelligence that would turn people off in that case - it would be the lecturing. If a stupid person lectures you, it's just as annoying as when a smart person lectures you. In both cases, the lecturer takes on a parental role and doesn't leave much room for opposing opinions.
In my experience, people really enjoy being around smart individuals as long as the smart person comes across as pleasant, open minded and non-judgmental. Unfortunately, many people who are very academically successful are uncomfortable and stilted in social situations, which makes them seem arrogant, intolerant of differences or twitchy/nervous. Lecturing people (one manifestation of this discomfort) can come off as condescending - you can say your piece, but do it in a faster, gentler, maybe even more humorous manner.