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  1. #11
    Filthy Apes! Kalach's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Misty_Mountain_Rose View Post
    Do you ever feel the overpowering urge to just tell everyone all the things you know in one big free-for-all because EVERYONE confides in you? I think clearing the air would be much better for everyone involved.
    Sort of. I like occasionally delivering everything I know about someone to that person, so long as I can do it at the start of the conversation and do it in one short sentence. Chips fall where they may. I do however usually reserve that for stuff that *I* think, but I guess sometimes I'll use it for getting rid of gossip too. But I usually don't know too much of teh Goss.


    Quote Originally Posted by runvardh View Post
    So what would you recommend for someone who thinks an idea is stupid, but is unsure why. Is it good to speak up anyway, even though they're still trying to think it through first?
    Go for it.

    But you're on the clock as soon as you start speaking.

    And chips falling where they may is sometimes a very good thing.

  2. #12
    Senior Member htb's Avatar
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    I thought this was a discussion of INTJs becoming flustered, then sullen, when they bowl a few gutterballs in a row (which is a documented phenomenon).

    Ingratiation and unction seem to be forms of manipulation supported by Fe.

  3. #13
    loopy Ulaes's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Misty_Mountain_Rose View Post
    As an INTJ, do you find that you cannot stand to be around people who won't say what is on their mind? People who manipulate to get what they want or who get mad at you but won't tell you they are mad?

    I tend to be pretty blunt and will tell people when I'm irritated and will voice my opinion on a topic when they ask... but it seems that everyone I talk to has some 'plan' to one-up someone else or get their own way at something, or they just won't speak up even though I know they have something to say. :steam:

    I think most of my frustration in a day comes from these kinds of things. Why does everyone have to be so darned ... complicated!

    I wish I could sit everyone in my office down and go:

    "She doesn't like you because you X"
    "He thinks you're an idiot, but he won't tell you because he needs you"
    "You know that staff meeting we had? There's more to that than you think."
    "You don't need to 'get back at her' for what she said... No. You really don't. Let it go"

    Etc etc etc.

    Do you ever feel the overpowering urge to just tell everyone all the things you know in one big free-for-all because EVERYONE confides in you? I think clearing the air would be much better for everyone involved.

    /rant off
    my _ntj dad is pretty damn honest, often he makes enemies because he is (usually)correct and irrerevernt in what he says . we'll think the same things but it wont occur to me to speak them. in this way its good to have him around because he'll verbalise a thought that went through my head and suddenly the world around me becomes clearer and less muddied by other peoples confused opinions.
    looking at his example develope a little more E to get it this stuff off your chest. it may prevent the stroke that was going to hit you in 20 yrs time but it may put you in the cross hairs of people you've shamed.

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