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  1. #81
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    Quote Originally Posted by IF3157 View Post
    You really tell people "I don't want to talk to you" in those words?
    I would imagine so, but I don't have photographic memory. Someone I'm actually friends with now (ENFP) was doing her probing thing, and I wasn't having it, and said something like "I don't care if you like me, it's none of my concern."

  2. #82
    now! in shell form INA's Avatar
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    That's not as bad.
    *Puts garland back into the box*
    hoarding time and space
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    — Antoine de Saint-Exupery

  3. #83
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    Quote Originally Posted by ajblaise View Post
    And it's the worst when the person you are trying to move past is a major extrovert. "Why do you hate me?!"...I've been asked this a few times. Unfortunately with extroverted girls it seems to only make them more interested.
    I don't know about extroverted girls, but I've definitely had people tell me later on that they thought I hated them because I didn't engage with them at some social function or other. In reality I probably hadn't thought twice about that person, either positively or negatively. It's funny because if I thought the way that they do, then I'd probably have to assume that the majority of people I run across actively dislike me.
    Artes, Scientia, Veritasiness

  4. #84
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    Quote Originally Posted by Orangey View Post
    I don't know about extroverted girls, but I've definitely had people tell me later on that they thought I hated them because I didn't engage with them at some social function or other. In reality I probably hadn't thought twice about that person, either positively or negatively.
    Ditto.
    hoarding time and space
    A single event can awaken within us a stranger totally unknown to us. To live is to be slowly born.
    — Antoine de Saint-Exupery

  5. #85
    Emerging Tallulah's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jack Flak View Post
    I would imagine so, but I don't have photographic memory. Someone I'm actually friends with now (ENFP) was doing her probing thing, and I wasn't having it, and said something like "I don't care if you like me, it's none of my concern."
    Oh, to be a guy in a case like that. If you're a girl and say that, a social WWIII starts.

  6. #86
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tallulah View Post
    Oh, to be a guy in a case like that. If you're a girl and say that, a social WWIII starts.
    So that's what happened.
    hoarding time and space
    A single event can awaken within us a stranger totally unknown to us. To live is to be slowly born.
    — Antoine de Saint-Exupery

  7. #87
    Senior Member Rachelinpa's Avatar
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    I would imagine so, but I don't have photographic memory. Someone I'm actually friends with now (ENFP) was doing her probing thing, and I wasn't having it, and said something like "I don't care if you like me, it's none of my concern."
    I've definitely heard that one before!

  8. #88
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tallulah View Post
    Oh, to be a guy in a case like that. If you're a girl and say that, a social WWIII starts.
    Yeah, I find F.O.A.D works better.

  9. #89
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    Quote Originally Posted by bluemonday View Post
    Yeah, I find F.O.A.D works better.
    Explain (with translation first, pls).
    F$%# off and die?
    hoarding time and space
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    — Antoine de Saint-Exupery

  10. #90
    Senior Member Rachelinpa's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tallulah View Post
    Hahaha, well, there is something to that. I think we're a little mistrustful of those who seem like they've always been able to waltz through life on the merits of their charms. I tend to like ENFPs, though.

    My problem isn't so much that an ENFP would talk to me for an hour and then walk away and that be the end of it. I have no problems chitchatting with someone on a superficial, fun level to pass the time, if it's someone that's easy to talk to. Not a fan of smalltalk in general, but there are definitely times where I'll strike up a conversation with someone, and I have no expectations of them for going forward.

    What I cannot, and WILL not do, no matter who gets mad at me, is open up and share intimate, personal things, or things that I consider private, just because someone wants to be entertained for an hour or two. I will just not bite, because if I did, I would feel violated. Keep it at fluff-level, and we'll be fine. Otherwise, you'll have to be a real friend in order to know more.
    I think it's good that the INTP tends to be cautious about this. ENFP can be insensitive with information received at times. However, I definitely like it better when information is disclosed a little bit at a time. I think it makes you a far more interesting person. And, I do feel "special" (for lack of a better word--"chosen" - haha), when the INTP is willing to open up or share with me. I treasure what they say far more than what other types tell me because it seems they cherish it as well. Every word is so carefully articulated and there are just so many more levels than what meets the eye. Intriguing!

    You know, maybe I just have a hard time respecting someone who is so willing to share so much of themselves in a brief interaction or at a party-like scene (I know it looks like I do that--but I don't). It's not that my behavior does not seek to know--on the contrary, I definitely do! But, I think actually, I am fine with not knowing. I wouldn't force a person to share with me if they were not at a place where they wanted to. But, I'm also definitely not going to say, "Please do not share with me!" I feel like I am sensitive to knowing if someone is feeling pressured and I back off if I know they do not want to talk about something.

    My INTP roommate does this thing where I will ask a question and he will just sort of stare off into space. It's not in the same hazy way my INFP friends do, but it is a way of skirting my questions. I actually pointed this out to him, which amused him because he didn't think he did it--but then, he caught himself and was like "Oh yeah, actually, you are right." Funny, funny.

    Yeah, so, I mean, if you do not want to share, that is ok with me. I am realizing the amount of expectations that come along with information shared... and to the tell the truth, I'm not sure I am up for that much personal responsibility right away. It's better if the onion is peeled slowly.

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