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[MBTI General] Wanting people to get their comeuppance

miss fortune

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my sister is an ENFJ... she has stated before that there's no greater feeling than vengance served on the evil :shock:
 

Moiety

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:confused:

When did it become about Fe or Fi? I didn't mention those concepts, really didn't think they had much bearing and another ENFP didn't seem mention it as a Fe/Fi thing.

I stated it's context dependent and you believe it's context independent. Sometimes the best strategy is not immediately saying anything because people make themselves look foolish and dig a deep hole for themselves without you having to say a word. I'm not advocating being a pushover, I'm advocating knowing when to move. If moving immediately works in that context then do it, but I don't think that's always the route to go. It's not about being afraid of confrontation, conflict, or indirect. Confrontation will occur and an explanation of what went wrong is expected.

Also, I've seen people keep trying to one-up each other and both of them look like idiotic children. You saying your piece doesn't make the other person cease from saying theirs. Matters escalate and spill into other areas because no one knew how to put the brakes on and take matters privately or their pride and sense of being disrespected keeps them from moving away from the situation towards other means of resolution.

Outside of the professional environment, do what you do and if it works continue on.

Yeah, call me selfish, but I don't care if it's in a work environment or not. And by Fi/Fe I meant being dependent on context or not. Te and Fe will act different depending on the context. Ti and Fi don't care as much.


And well, my strategy has always worked for me, so that is why I shared it.
 

scortia

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I am really annoyed by bad people who manage to get off scott-free without some bad karma biting them in the ass. I don't like seeing someone just get away with their "crime" and feeling no remorse or repercussions. I don't necessarily want them to be tortured, but I do get very fixated on the need for them to feel true "justice" for their actions. If they're too deluded and selfish to feel guilt or fault, at least they can get some sort of punishment ... it's still something, though maturity, growth, and humility would be my first choice always.
 

Unkindloving

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Karma doesn't work swiftly or effectively enough for me.
It takes a lot for me to feel that i want some form of justice or suffering to be served, but i don't feel at ease when it gets to that point. Something has to be done or a point made for me to be at peace with the situation.

I've planted many ticking time-bombs in the minds of people who have hurt me. I've called them out on lies, or informed the right people of the truth. I actually have a situation that i've been meaning to throw some "justice" into for some time, but want to displace emotions from it first.
 

Tiltyred

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I can see both sides, the hurt and the vengeful, so I don't put more weight on one than the other. They're two sides of one coin. Best just not to deal in that currency if you can help it.

I've only done direct get back a couple of times in my life. I would prefer to leave it to Universe. I do believe things even out. More than that, I guess I think I can't be sure I'm doing the right thing because I'm not omniscient, so that makes it more likely I would be wrong to do wrong even if it looks like the other person deserves it.
 

PuddleRiver

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If it wasn't against my religion and I didn't have a strong sense of self-preservation I could see myself becoming a regular angel of vengeance.

Get outta my head, cafe! I would love to do the same. However, I would have to answer to that *Higher Power*. Nah, I figure I'll have enough to answer for.

This is where I find a need to have super powers. I could do whatever I wanted with my mind. :happy2: (and still have to be accountable, of course ::()
 

highlander

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Reminds me of this really great old movie, The Magnificent Ambersons.
 

cafe

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Get outta my head, cafe! I would love to do the same. However, I would have to answer to that *Higher Power*. Nah, I figure I'll have enough to answer for.

This is where I find a need to have super powers. I could do whatever I wanted with my mind. :happy2: (and still have to be accountable, of course ::()
If you find a some way to get the super powers and a loophole from accountability, look me up. We could have a lot of fun until we started feeling guilty! :yes:
 

Lacey

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There have been people who've done terrible things to me, but still at the same time...I don't really want anything terrible to happen to them. I don't know why that is.

It does bother me A LOT though, when good people aren't rewarded and life basically craps all over them.
 

cafe

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I don't want anything terrible to happen to hardly anyone. Mild to moderately unpleasant, though . . .
 

Lacey

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I don't want anything terrible to happen to hardly anyone. Mild to moderately unpleasant, though . . .
Hmm...well, I guess if I think more about it, I guess there are a few people that I wouldn't mind mild to moderately unpleasant things happening to them... :devil:

When I think of revenge/justice/comeuppance, I tend to think about it in extremes...since that's how most people in my life tend to treat it. :/
 

cafe

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Hmm...well, I guess if I think more about it, I guess there are a few people that I wouldn't mind mild to moderately unpleasant things happening to them... :devil:

When I think of revenge/justice/comeuppance, I tend to think about it in extremes...since that's how most people in my life tend to treat it. :/
I think of that bitch principal at my kids' old elementary and how I'd like to spray her VW Bug convertible down with some kind of corrosive substance! Just to cause a paint/body damage, not to eat away her break lines or anything. I can dream.

I did get on World of Warcraft and name an orc after her once (the resemblance was pretty strong) and run her out into the desert naked to be stung to death by scorpions. :whistling:
 

The Outsider

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I can not relate at all. Seeing the person who offended me get hurt or anything like that would offer me no pleasure.

If there is a problem, I'll deal with it while the problem is still there. I don't concern myself with what comes after.
 

SilkRoad

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There have been people who've done terrible things to me, but still at the same time...I don't really want anything terrible to happen to them. I don't know why that is.

It does bother me A LOT though, when good people aren't rewarded and life basically craps all over them.

Thanks people, interesting responses and different viewpoints :) And yeah, I agree with the above, especially the last bit!

In a way…I don’t think it’s so much that I secretly crave revenge or that I really want something bad to happen to them as a result of their bad behaviour. Maybe it’s a combination of jealousy and offended sense of justice on my part. Because it just seems sometimes almost as though people get rewarded for their bad behaviour. A slightly crude example would be, someone cheating on their spouse without remorse, hurting the spouse terribly, and then going off with the person they cheated with, and having a wonderfully happy life with them.

In my case, someone recently hurt my feelings badly, showed that they placed little or no value on my friendship, and that they had little trust or respect for me (in a situation where I had really tried to show trust and respect to them.) They’re now off travelling the world and from the bits I have heard from mutual friends, having a superb time and loads of fun. I, on the other hand, have had a rotten winter where it’s been dark and cold, I’ve had a hard time finding work and am very stressed about life, a few friends have died…etc.

Obviously, the rotten winter has absolutely nothing to do with this person who messed me around, except for dealing with some very hurt feelings (which has added to the stress etc.) And I know from the above I sound like a total moaner. It just…seems unfair. Especially because I know this person has behaved badly in other ways and they have no sense of acceptance of responsibility.

I know that this person already has a hard time maintaining good and meaningful relationships and someday maybe they will actually notice (if they haven’t already.) It would be a form of karma/justice served if they realised this some day and felt remorse/regret over it. But some people seem to be able to remain in a state of happy oblivious selfish immaturity where they’re not aware of this sort of thing at all – especially charmers, like this person, who may not be able to maintain sustained meaningful friendships, but they have no problem at all finding new people to have fun with wherever they go.

I guess it just bugs me that people can cause damage and then obliviously go their way to have fun. Either the moment of reckoning (even if it’s just internal realisation of their bad behaviour) has not yet come – or it may never come – or it has come but they’re hiding it damn well.
 
G

Glycerine

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Fe seems hardcore on the comeuppance thing. I, myself, get revenge fantasies. It has to be a major thing though. Once I label a person a "jerk", it's not good.
 

SilkRoad

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In any such cases, I would probably totally forgive someone who came back to me months or years later and said "Man, I was an asshole then. I am so sorry that I screwed you around and would like to make amends if at all possible. I've also been doing my best to make amends to any other people I've knowingly hurt through my stupid actions. Here are some concrete examples of how I've changed and grown as a person. Please forgive me for being such a jerk."

Depends a bit on circumstances but that would almost certainly result in me forgiving someone totally and utterly and maybe even saying something like "don't be so hard on yourself" :D But I can dream on that this kind of thing is ever going to happen with most people... :D
 

ConstantlyImagining

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I personally have no desire for the ones that hurt me to suffer. I would however, like them to try an make amends
 

cafe

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Fe seems hardcore on the comeuppance thing. I, myself, get revenge fantasies. It has to be a major thing though. Once I label a person a "jerk", it's not good.
LOL. Yeah, I have an INFP daughter and if she's going to get, you it's going to right when you tick her off.

She is in middle school and as she was getting off the bus one day, she saw a kid picking on an autistic acquaintance of hers. She flew off the bus and ran up to the kid and kicked him in the shin and that was pretty much the end of that.
 

CzeCze

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Vengeance is a dish best served cold. And with a side of A-1 sauce.

Actually, scratch that, I loooooove the equivalent of jumping up, pointing, and yelling, 'IN YO FACE!!!??!!" Does this mean I am a spiritually lower evolved being? Maybe. But, that also means that ^^ is so damn satisfying!!! LOL.

I think I differ from my friends because when someone is really on my "ish list" and they get called out for it or something bad happens to them related to the offense - I feel pretty satisfied. I don't even front by saying "I almost feel bad". Because I don't. It's only right in the world. When bad things happen to "bad people" I feel glee. It makes me happy.

BTW, there is a difference between 'justice' because an act is righted or addressed and the concept of 'vindictive' which is just unleashing hurt because someone hurt you.

"Vindictive" --> there is no equanimity, you will never be satisfied and the hurt you unleash does not necessarily match the original offense. It matches your ego. Also, it's personal.

"Justice" --> on the other hand truly is blind and is action oriented, not subject specific. "Punishment fits the crime [not the criminal, not the prosecutor, not necessarily the victim]"

Of course everyone feels justified in their anger or dislike of someone else - we need to feel justified for those feelings to continue.

For me though, to answer the OP, if I don't like you - to a scaleable point - your misfortunates elicits no sympathy from me. And in fact, it can make my day.

It has to be proportional though and not involve innocent 3rd parties. For instance, I'm a little annoyed with you because you are a bossy loudmouthed coworker --> you spill [not burning hot] coffee all over yourself it makes me go :hee hee: on the inside. Same coworker --> mother gets hospitalized. Of course I feel just as bad for the coworker and their mom as I would for any other acquaintance.

Having said all that ^^ I do think from speaking with others that I can be more classically "vengeful" or "unsympathetic" than the norm. Again, certain 'bad things' happening to certain people can really make my day. I don't necessarily characterize the people as "bad people" --> I just don't like them or they have done/are doing something specific that irks me. See, at least at can make that distinction. And I don't necessarily harbor revenge schemes or want to do anything to the people myself, just when something does happen :shrug: and :hee hee:.

On the flip, I also realize people can wish the same of me and accept it as a way of the world.

I think I'm in the minority view point partly because it is not socially condoned to admit publicy to this ^^. I gladly answer honestly on personality tests, "Do you ever wish misfortune on others?" :yes: "Do you ever find pleasure in other's misfortune's?" :yes:
 
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