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  1. #11
    Sniffles
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    Quote Originally Posted by edcoaching View Post
    Yeah...INFJs are more likely to go to a stack of books or the Web to figure out a solution than to God forbid ask for help, and we don't quite always have the resources to solve it ourselves.
    ROTFL! Yes that's my usual course of action when I'm depressed.

  2. #12
    Emperor/Dictator kyuuei's Avatar
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    Sorry to hear about that, first of all.

    I definitely had 2 points of time in my life where I was depressed. I can look back on them now and be able to tell.. I couldn't then. I probably would have saved myself a LOT of frustration and pain by reaching out for help, but as depression monsters tend to go, you're unaware you need help for a long time.. and aren't sure you're worth the effort to do so even if you discover it. So congrats on taking that step, it's an important one and there ARE people capable of building you up back up.

    My depression was situational both times.. as in, something dramatic happened that forced me into it, it didn't grow on me overtime.. but sometimes I think the latter way might be worse.. there's nothing obvious and sudden to trigger it, so you're lost to any explanations or rationality as to why this or that is going on.

    The good news is depression is definitely treatable, so I encourage you to reach out and seek support and continue to accept help.. there's no shame in being helped, and it took me a long time coming for my stubborn ass to learn that lesson. Just to know other people have gone through similar things and overcame them gives you a sense of hope.

    Keep striving for it!
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    Halla74: Think your way through the world. Feel your way through life.

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  3. #13
    Junior Member takeheart's Avatar
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    Default Details, details!

    Wow, thanks for all of the responses! I wasn't expecting so many so soon!

    I ask what can "trigger" it because there was a point I hit a couple of years ago where all of my walls and facades crumbled and the depression began to seep in and slowly grow. I was completely unaware of it up to that point - I thought I was strong, confident, well-adjusted ... but I was just lying to myself.

    The "trigger" was the realization that I'm a complete doormat, that I can't overcome it, and that I couldn't stop anyone from being bad. That I was powerless in the face of selfishness and cruelty. That I couldn't be Superwoman. That screwed me up SO BADLY that I'm sure a non-Idealist would think I was pathetic, but it's true!

    Then it was compounded by a lack of achievement and real knowledge of what I'm capable of. I've done nothing, so I guess I'm capable of nothing right now. I want to be special. I want to stand out. I want attention and I want to feel valuable and important! And that's really the crux of it - I want to be liked, I want to be popular, I want to have best friends and I want to feel like people care about me. I'm not getting that right now, and it makes me feel like maybe ... I don't really exist. I'm an outsider looking in and that will never be enough. Loneliness is what finally drove me to a place where I knew I needed help.

    So I feel like I'm wasting my life and have yet to actually do anything, least of all plunge in and actually live a meaningful life. I may be 19, but most 13 year olds have lived more than I have!

    These are the thoughts that I batter myself with when I can't get out of of my own head.

    Thanks for your concern, everyone. And I hope all of you who are also stuck in the abyss find your way out soon - or find someone to lift you out.

  4. #14
    Senior Member SuperFob's Avatar
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    I've been depressed for a while. That's bad because I'm a guy who uses inspiration as a fuel, and it's hard to feel inspired when you're depressed.

    Why am I depressed? It's pretty complicated and I don't feel like listing all the details. Let's just say that my life has been a constant whirlwind of failure, disappointment, and me doing what other people tell me to. The constant stress of school and loneliness over the past few years finally pushed me off the cliff.

  5. #15
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    Gadammit, I hate it when ENFs are sad. *destroys the room*

  6. #16
    Senior Member SuperFob's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by edcoaching View Post
    Yeah...INFJs are more likely to go to a stack of books or the Web to figure out a solution than to God forbid ask for help, and we don't quite always have the resources to solve it ourselves.
    That's been pretty much the only solution for me. With the exception of certain NF's (of whom I've only really met a couple, both psychologists, who are trying to help me out right now), people in general can't understand my feelings when I reveal them. Any NT I talk to either acts like I'm making a big deal out of nothing, refusing to believe that I can react the way I do emotionally to certain things, or they act like my emotions are something that can be controlled and switched on and off like the lights in my house. When it comes to the S's I've met and tried to talk to, they simply don't have the capacity to understand my situation.

    So, I've mostly tried to just deal with things on my own

  7. #17
    Emperor/Dictator kyuuei's Avatar
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    Well Takeheart. I would have told you that I spent a great deal of my life not living it, something I take pride in ammending everyday, and that now you see the problem the only plausible step is a solution.. but *Somebody* destroyed the room.
    Kantgirl: Just say "I'm feminine and I'll punch anyone who says otherwise!"
    Halla74: Think your way through the world. Feel your way through life.

    Cimarron: maybe Prpl will be your girl-bud
    prplchknz: i don't like it

    In Search Of... ... Kiwi Sketch Art ... Dream Journal ... Kyuuei's Cook book ... Kyu's Tiny House Blog ... Minimalist Challenge ... Kyu's Savings Challenge

  8. #18
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    Quote Originally Posted by kyuuei View Post
    but *Somebody* destroyed the room.
    It was well-intentioned.

  9. #19
    Senior Member Nighthawk's Avatar
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    I'm an INTP who has suffered from depression on and off. Sometimes quite badly. Most of mine hinges around the mundane repetition in life and job ... hence my desire to mix things up and job-hop a lot. I'm usually energized and happy the first year or so in a job. Then it all becomes a repetitive chore and I sink into depression ... especially when management tries to enforce schedules and arbitrary rules.

    I just came off of 3 years on cymbalta, and have been struggling to stay on an even keel. I tend to self-medicate with alcohol, so I have to be careful there. So far, it is working out better than I expected. I'd like to remain off of anti-depressants for good, since I'm already taking meds for various other ailments.

    I wish I had the magic answer, but I don't. Sometimes you can overcome it through sheer force of will alone. Sometimes a change of environment helps. Sometimes, however, I feel that pharmaceutical intervention is necessary for the more serious cases. I know that is probably controversial, but it is just my personal view.

  10. #20
    Junior Member takeheart's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jack Flak View Post
    It was well-intentioned.
    I hope you left at least one dark corner for us all to cry in!

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