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[INFJ] You know you're an INFJ when...

S

Sniffles

Guest
- You can wonder on a problem for days and suddenly, MONTHs later, after you've forgotten the problem, you suddenly figure it out.

Yes I just had one of those moments last night. Only it wasn't months but YEARS later.


- You randomly speak in weird accents in certain situations ( Cock-er-ney for banter, Babycakes' for musing thoughts, et c )

Oh not only that, but make certain gestures in those same situations.
 

Apollanaut

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Aug 27, 2008
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550
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sx/sp
I do the weird accents thing as well. I never connected it to being an INFJ until now!
 

Skyward

Badoom~
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Jul 3, 2008
Messages
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infj
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9w1
Ive been thinking about differences in the types. I mean the different types of each type.

INFJs seem, to me, to come in the 'Intellectual' and 'Empath' flavors. They both have Fe, but one seems to use it a lot more (Empath), I know INFJs who are more comfortable in a book than 'reading' people's mannerisms ( Me ) or people who have it vice versa, prefer people over books ( My dad )

The first seems more like an INTP, but has a lot more F in them (When I first looked up MBTI that's what I thought I was. An INTP with a lot of Fe)

The second seems more 'INFJ-y' (In the sense that Fe is a higher function on their list) - Theyre the type that is less loosey-goosey about people and worries about them more, and seems to know what is going on more in the way of people: "I never know if they're being rough or not, it makes me anxious"

Maybe its just a maturity thing? Or just holding in Fe?
 

Lotr246

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Aug 2, 2008
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350
Ive been thinking about differences in the types. I mean the different types of each type.

INFJs seem, to me, to come in the 'Intellectual' and 'Empath' flavors. They both have Fe, but one seems to use it a lot more (Empath), I know INFJs who are more comfortable in a book than 'reading' people's mannerisms ( Me ) or people who have it vice versa, prefer people over books ( My dad )

The first seems more like an INTP, but has a lot more F in them (When I first looked up MBTI that's what I thought I was. An INTP with a lot of Fe)

Yes, we should also add the all-encompassing 'Humanist' flavor. Oh, and I thought I was an INTP too for some time. Developing the Fe much more these days.
 

sade

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Aug 23, 2008
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761
I have been wondering about that too, but think it's more of a sub-type issue. Please develope further, I'm interested in seeing what you find. :popc1:

I've personally started wondering if I'm a strange love child of an INTJ & ENFJ at times.. Or an INFP.
 
S

Sniffles

Guest
Ive been thinking about differences in the types. I mean the different types of each type.

INFJs seem, to me, to come in the 'Intellectual' and 'Empath' flavors. They both have Fe, but one seems to use it a lot more (Empath), I know INFJs who are more comfortable in a book than 'reading' people's mannerisms ( Me ) or people who have it vice versa, prefer people over books ( My dad )

The first seems more like an INTP, but has a lot more F in them (When I first looked up MBTI that's what I thought I was. An INTP with a lot of Fe)

The second seems more 'INFJ-y' (In the sense that Fe is a higher function on their list) - Theyre the type that is less loosey-goosey about people and worries about them more, and seems to know what is going on more in the way of people: "I never know if they're being rough or not, it makes me anxious"

Maybe its just a maturity thing? Or just holding in Fe?



You know Skyward, I was actually pondering on the issue of sub-types yesterday - so I thank you for bringing this up.

You have a good point here concerning INFJ subtypes. I certainly fit into the "INTP + F" category.

It could be a gender issue: since it was discussed here that female INFJs tend to rely more on Fe while male INFJs rely more on Ti.
 

Kestrel

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Nov 14, 2008
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2w1
Interesting. I wonder if there are more "subtypes" to INFJ. For me, personally, I definitely rely on Fe over Ti. If I were to list my function order preference they would be slightly altered over the "natural" INFJ preferences. I'd probably list them as Ni, Fe, Se, Ti. Though it's debatable whether each type's function orders are set in stone. I don't think they are, just the first and second preference.
 

Skyward

Badoom~
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infj
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9w1
I'm pretty sure function -strength- is set in stone, but preference to each person varies things. The 'Humanist Scholar' subtype probably goes Ni/Ti > Fe > Se (Well for me, Inferior Se is just a troublemaker 90% of the time. But it's nice when I need/want to connect with the SPs and SJs out there)

The 'Humanist Friend' subtype probably uses Ni/Fe > Ti > Se (Though from the above, there are exceptions)

Those are the main 2 subtypes of the INFJ. I haven't found any others yet (Though there could be the 'Humanist in Se Clothing' that uses Se primarily)

I've personally started wondering if I'm a strange love child of an INTJ & ENFJ at times.. Or an INFP.

I always felt 'Somewhere between ENFP and INTP' - My room is a total mess, so is my workstation in school. I guess that fits under the 'consistently messy' category in one of the profiles.

It could be a gender issue: since it was discussed here that female INFJs tend to rely more on Fe while male INFJs rely more on Ti.

Society drills it into us that Men shouldn't have Fe, so we hide it and express Ti more. We're also stuck waiting until the mid 20s to really start relationships cause all the young girls want the ExTPs ;)

( There's an about the Dark Tower series by a band called Demons & Wizards, the album is called Crimson King - I was like 'OMG awesome' when I figured it out since I had the album for at least a year now. If you like Eurometal and the Dark Tower series, you'll love that album. It goes through the whole series: '1: Crimson King, 3: Terror Train, 5: The Gunslinger. Guys go to iTunes and download it. Its awesome!)
 
S

Sniffles

Guest
"Humanist Scholar", that's classic. I'll make that my member title. :D

The 'Humanist Scholar' subtype probably goes Ni/Ti > Fe > Se (Well for me, Inferior Se is just a troublemaker 90% of the time. But it's nice when I need/want to connect with the SPs and SJs out there)

Yes this is how it seems how my functions operate as well. Ni/Ti over Fe and Se

Society drills it into us that Men shouldn't have Fe, so we hide it and express Ti more. We're also stuck waiting until the mid 20s to really start relationships cause all the young girls want the ExTPs ;)

Ahhh well fuck that explains my basic indifference towards love up to this point. See Amargith, there's hope after all. :D
 

Kestrel

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Nov 14, 2008
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2w1
The 'Humanist Friend' subtype probably uses Ni/Fe > Ti > Se (Though from the above, there are exceptions)

This one probably fits me better. Also I seem to test around 1-2 on the Enneagram test. And my 8 is pretty strong.

Society drills it into us that Men shouldn't have Fe, so we hide it and express Ti more. We're also stuck waiting until the mid 20s to really start relationships cause all the young girls want the ExTPs ;)

Lately, I've been letting my Fe out more, but only in small, controlled doses. And as for the second part, I find that it's mostly mature people that find the warmth and stability of an INFJ attractive.

I also think female INFJs have the edge in dating. Mainly because they don't have to put up a facade to exist peacefully in society. Or maybe they do. :huh:

However, I think INFJ guys are very much the antithesis of the negative stereotypical male traits. So we have the edge there. At least, on paper.
 
S

Sniffles

Guest
However, I think INFJ guys are very much the antithesis of the negative stereotypical male traits. So we have the edge there. At least, on paper.

Yeah on paper. Reality is a much different story.

It's rather odd in my particular case since I don't fit into either the big tough male image or the soft sensitive one either. I seem to operate on my own basis of masculinity; which includes elements of both.
 

Lotr246

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"Humanist Scholar", that's classic. I'll make that my member title. :D



Yes this is how it seems how my functions operate as well. Ni/Ti over Fe and Se

How does this look to outsiders, the Ni/Ti combination, if it even sees the outside?
 

Skyward

Badoom~
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infj
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9w1
It's rather odd in my particular case since I don't fit into either the big tough male image or the soft sensitive one either. I seem to operate on my own basis of masculinity; which includes elements of both.

I run the same way, and that's the tricky part, if we're not a stereotype we only attract people who aren't stereotypes themselves (Mature people, basically).

Heck Ive been called gay, AND Ive been called heartless. Neither of them true. Though Ive never been called a heartless queer :newwink:

Relationships are more about what you're willing to deal with, not what you like about a person. Many people don't value what INFJs offer in relationships and just see us as weirdos, and go toward the people that have more obvious, attractive traits which end up with more obvious, unattractive traits. "He's the life of a party for a reason, see him hopping around conversations? He does that with relationships, too." or "He deals with his problems with force and gets them out of the way, he'll bring that to YOU if you decide to be with him."

All in all, patience is a virtue and I don't mind being single :D

How does this look to outsiders, the Ni/Ti combination, if it even sees the outside?
I'm guessing 'Smart cold weirdo' and I have been accused of looking like a stalker before and that was QUITE the revelation.. granted my jokes and retort-ical banter are QUITE gutterheaded...
 

Kestrel

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I seem to operate on my own basis of masculinity;

I do this as well. If society's definition of masculinity doesn't fit me, I redefine it for myself. I don't mind catering to those gender roles and doing what's expected of me on a masculine level (protective, assertive, dominant etc). But I sure as hell am not going to limit myself to what everyone else thinks I can be. I feel like my whole life has not just been about breaking the mold, but about shattering it with a sledgehammer.
 

Apollanaut

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sx/sp
Yeah on paper. Reality is a much different story.

It's rather odd in my particular case since I don't fit into either the big tough male image or the soft sensitive one either. I seem to operate on my own basis of masculinity; which includes elements of both.

Does that make you a big sensitive male or a soft tough one? I think I'm the former of the two!
 

Apollanaut

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How does this look to outsiders, the Ni/Ti combination, if it even sees the outside?

A number of unflattering possibilities spring to mind, based on comments from other people when I'm deeply engrossed in both processes:

"Pseudo-intellectual"
"Dreamer"
"Depressed weirdo"

I've given up even bothering to say "Please leave me alone, I'm trying to think!"
 

jaku

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Dec 18, 2008
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4,5?
I do this as well. If society's definition of masculinity doesn't fit me, I redefine it for myself. I don't mind catering to those gender roles and doing what's expected of me on a masculine level (protective, assertive, dominant etc). But I sure as hell am not going to limit myself to what everyone else thinks I can be. I feel like my whole life has not just been about breaking the mold, but about shattering it with a sledgehammer.

i'll just throw in my two cents as an infj male.
...yep.

but not even consciously. i mean, now i'm consciously aware of it, but in the past it was like 'alright, someone's in trouble, i'll do my protective, aggressive if need be, now. okay, someone has a lot of emotional issues to and nowhere else to unload, let's give it a whirl'

i like to think that most infjs understand the workings of our society so well we either find the things we know are right and advocate them, or find the corrupt and try and mend it. neither role requires exercising 'masculinity' or 'femininity', just terribly incredibly strongly focused introverted intuition and feeling, and then some sensing and thinking and judging and perceiving to help us apply our insides to the outside.
 

Apollanaut

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i'll just throw in my two cents as an infj male.
...yep.

but not even consciously. i mean, now i'm consciously aware of it, but in the past it was like 'alright, someone's in trouble, i'll do my protective, aggressive if need be, now. okay, someone has a lot of emotional issues to and nowhere else to unload, let's give it a whirl'

i like to think that most infjs understand the workings of our society so well we either find the things we know are right and advocate them, or find the corrupt and try and mend it. neither role requires exercising 'masculinity' or 'femininity', just terribly incredibly strongly focused introverted intuition and feeling, and then some sensing and thinking and judging and perceiving to help us apply our insides to the outside.

Well said! It ain't easy being an INFJ male in our society, but being something of an outsider has its advantages - we are less bound by traditional expectations regarding gender and behaviour.

Maybe I should add:

You know you're an INFJ when you do not conform to conventional expectations.
 
S

Sniffles

Guest
Does that make you a big sensitive male or a soft tough one? I think I'm the former of the two!

I guess I'd be the soft tough one. One minute people admire me for being gentle and compassionate, and the next they'll condemn me as a cold-hearted brute.

I feel like my whole life has not just been about breaking the mold, but about shattering it with a sledgehammer.

You know that's exactly how I pictured myself as well.

I'll make this short, but I think the most important element in masculinity is integrity; not big muscles and definately not a big cock. To me that's all silly nonsense. Of course a man should be assertive, protective, and all that - but it's secondary. I don't believe a man should be a crying wimp, but neither do I buy the notion of being a cold-hearted prick either.

Just my simple take on it.
 
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