It makes sense to me, proteanmix, to see good living as a combination of the two - influencing what we can and not getting too hung up on what we can't.
This also requires some discernment about what is actually influencible.
Like most everything it is achieving a balance. And being able to accept "what is" over what we'd like. I think that gets a lot of folks in trouble with themselves and others.
Good point. No one wants to feel blown by the winds of fate.