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  1. #51
    Senior Member Rogue's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by erinavery View Post
    i've had very few but in a way they're sweet and i like feeling all giddy and googly and i want to do silly sweet things for them all the time...i can be prone to grand gestures... and feeling like that makes me happy but i also hate loosing my composure...hate that my normally strong confident self turns shy and unsure.

    also...i think i see people as they are...perfection isn't important to me...i think the fact that discovery is what drives me in life leads me to be drawn to people i find intriguing...interesting...not perfect...the unfortunate thing though is that it's more of an outsider observation thing and just because i find them irresistibly charming and fascinating doesn't actually mean we'd be any good together....so i guess it ends when that realization sets in.

    Erinavery and I have discussed this at length and found we are in total agreement she talks more eloquent than me though....
    "bad things happen when people touch me!!"

  2. #52
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    Damn, I was definitely NF when I was younger. I have had some ridiculous crushes only an NF can have, methinks.

  3. #53
    Senior Member Clover's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by tenINsFJ View Post
    I get a crush instantly a lot of the times and fantasize about the person being perfect(not a dirty way). THen I find out they arent and then it's over.
    LOL, I do the opposite... All my daydreams about my crushes are dirty.

  4. #54
    Senior Member Rogue's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Clover View Post
    LOL, I do the opposite... All my daydreams about my crushes are dirty.
    "bad things happen when people touch me!!"

  5. #55
    Senior Member Rogue's Avatar
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    Hmmmm...I'm always the Crush-er.....I wanna be the crush-ee! LOL
    "bad things happen when people touch me!!"

  6. #56
    mod love baby... Lady_X's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Nihilen View Post
    Damn, I was definitely NF when I was younger. I have had some ridiculous crushes only an NF can have, methinks.
    so...that's funny...they ARE ridiculous!! haha...and i guess as an nt you can distance yourself easier now? that's cool....i want that.
    There can’t be any large-scale revolution until there’s a personal revolution, on an individual level. It’s got to happen inside first.
    -Jim Morrison

  7. #57
    Senior Member PinkIceTD's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rogue View Post
    Hmmmm...I'm always the Crush-er.....I wanna be the crush-ee! LOL
    you probably are and just don't know it!

  8. #58
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    Quote Originally Posted by erinavery View Post
    so...that's funny...they ARE ridiculous!! haha...and i guess as an nt you can distance yourself easier now? that's cool....i want that.
    Now I am in control of my feelings, I cannot choose who to like, though I know what attracts me and what doesn't; but if I ever 'love' someone and it seems it can't work out, I can instantly switch to utter indifference towards her.

    When I was in my teens I used to have crushes ... Ah, it's too embarrassing and irrational. It was just ridiculous.

  9. #59
    Senior Member mwv6r's Avatar
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    As an NF, I love to fall in love and am guilty of idealizing the object of my crush. When I was in high school and early college, I would get swept up in a moment with a crush and cheat on whatever boyfriend I had at the time. This inevitably led to a big mess and a lot of self-loathing on my part, and I knew I needed to shape up. Especially since meeting my current partner, I've been very watchful of myself and have overcome that side of me. I read an interesting passage in a relationship book about how when two people have a mutual crush that develops into the opportunity for an illicit relationship, we are really in love with ourselves because we are in love with the way that the other person views us. (Kind of a big narcissistic love fest, because the guy you're crushing on who has a crush on you is probably in love with your idea of him, too.) So now when a little crush comes up for me (happens maybe a couple times a year) I have gotten very good at imagining a connection with the person in my mind only. I allow myself to daydream, but I absolutely forbid myself from acting on the crush in any way. It eventually dissipates, and I come to see the person's faults and how silly I was for feeling that way and am glad I only acted on it in my head rather than in real life.

    All that makes me glad I'm not in a relationship with a fellow NF. Our types can be very, very admirable, but I think sometimes we have to be vigilant because our passionate hearts can lead us astray!

  10. #60
    mod love baby... Lady_X's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Nihilen View Post
    Now I am in control of my feelings, I cannot choose who to like, though I know what attracts me and what doesn't; but if I ever 'love' someone and it seems it can't work out, I can instantly switch to utter indifference towards her.

    When I was in my teens I used to have crushes ... Ah, it's too embarrassing and irrational. It was just ridiculous.
    oh...thanks for answering but...shit i thought i deleted it...haha
    but yeah that's cool i think i do that too after the realization sets in.

    and who the hell even cares anyway....why are we even discussing this...yuck.
    There can’t be any large-scale revolution until there’s a personal revolution, on an individual level. It’s got to happen inside first.
    -Jim Morrison

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