[INFP] Why are you so quiet?

[EJCC]

how does someone develop J?

Organize, my friend, organize. Make some lists. Sort things. Be obsessive about deadlines. Actually, be obsessive about everything.

i.e. I have no idea. It MAY start by opting out of stream-of-consciousness grocery shopping, which involves no grocery list and a lot of "Oh! I need that!", and is a P thing to do.

 

[EJCC]

Yeah, that smile thing too.

Okay, I'm not even an I, and people tell me to smile! I just want to yell at them "What if I DON'T want to smile, mofo????"

 

[FDG]

After being asked why I'm so quiet I usually try to respond with something appropriate, such as "Why are you so stupid?".

rotfl, i'll try that

 

[colmena]

When someone is using the chopping board in the kitchen, the sound rattles through my ears. There's like a thuddy echo that's really discomforting. I think I just have sensitive ears.

 

[Brooke]

rotfl, i'll try that

You should. They might not ask you again. Of course, they'll tell everyone you're either crazy or a bitch, but hey - you win some you lose some.

 

[Apollanaut]

Lol if you dont mind i'm borrowing that one for the next time i get "Cheer up it may never happen"

Feel free!

 

[norepinephrine]

I usually get asked "Why are you gripping that knife so vigorously while staring into my eyes and twitching?" but yeah, that too.

roflmao. Well, not actually. But I chuckled.

I (once upon a time) had a coworker who continually asked me why I was mad at her whenever I quietly concentrated on balancing the office budget.

Not mad, exactly, just slightly unbalanced.

 

[mlittrell]

reason 1) (I)ntrovert, most of the world is extroverted, ya i think there are more extorverts than introverts 2) i(N)tuition, most of the world is comprised of sensors

 

[INA]

1) Economy is good - why say what does not need to be or what should be understood?
2) I don't want to encourage people to talk to me when I don't feel like talking to them.
3) I disapprove of a situation but do not want to piss off the people involved or do not consider it my place to change it. I am not going to hold back if I open my mouth, so I keep it shut.
4) I am processing/concentrating on something.
5) I am just in a contemplative frame of mind.
6) Too lazy to talk.

 

[Valiant]

I think being too quiet to someone often makes them feel that their company is unwanted.

Well, I always get this at big family meet-ups. I get all quiet and put my hands in my pockets so that they won't see my clenched fists. I'm like this around other people I don't like that much, too. So, for me who is an extrovert or ambivert, this really means that I don't want the company, that i'd probably pay a goddamn fee to be left alone.

Conclusion: extroverts who don't have a huge insight in how introverts works most of the time think you guys hate the company.

 

[snowflurri]

All the time!

They ask why I'm not as social as the other teenagers, or why I don't even hang around them. Or when in a group discussion that has digressed from a social issue to movies, they ask why I don't say anything.

Which is why I'm pretty quiet because no one really takes an intetrest in what I have to say, save for a FEW people that I rarely meet, and if I DO say something, no one really cares.

 

[jtanSis1]

They fear what they don't understand. When I'm quiet, they respect me, but not out of fear, but that they feel that I care for them. Like an awe kind of fear.

 

[Jaded]

I think im only quiet when i honeslty have nothing to say, and i only have nothing to say because im honeslty too busy thinking to even formulate a single thought that could be put down ina sentence...in class discussions i find myself so overwhelmed by all the info that i have to go over it in my head and have whole discussions in my head, but i dont usually say much, the teacher tends to think im stupid lol or whatever, and iv gotten the question why u so quiet a infinity number of times....meh...i jst ignore it now and say , ummmm coz i have nothing to say? or jst smile and walk away lol...i just got really sick of loud people thinking that just because they feel the need to blurt out every passing thought and share it (loudly most of the time) with the rest of us makes them any more interestin or smart or better etc...its just a totally different way of being, so in conclusion why is being quiet seen as a bad thing? if anything people are just too loud nowadays...
p.s alot of people think im loud and annoying (this is when i get really hyper and FEEL like tlkin)....so its not a matter of not wanting to tlk or wanting to tlk as if its just a switch u flick on and off...it just naturally happens and i dont think anyone should really be judged about either mode...=)

 

[Rebel Nun]

I sometimes get the "why are you so quiet" question. But the one people ask the most is "do you ever get really mad?" I smile pretty much all the time so people think I'm happy all the time. I'm happy most of the time, but even when I'm not it is difficult NOT to smile. Sometimes I even smile when I'm yelling.

 

[ThePenIsMightier]

I'm pretty quiet unless I'm around a group of people I am really comfortable with. Normally I'm just observing or kind of in a daydream, but I hate it. I always get worried people think I'm being judgemental by being quiet or simply don't like their company. So I make it a point to at least try and engage in conversation, even when I don't want to, so they'll feel like I'm not a judgemental asshole.

 

[mlittrell]

answer: introverts (25%) extroverts (75%)

 

[quietmusician]

I really don't like that question either. Like everyone is suppose to be loud and everything. One day I'll surprise someone with a new attitude, lol.

 

[mshl]

i'm an enfp, and i get asked that, too. it annoys the hell out of me.
if i have nothing substantial to say, then i'd rather not waste my breath.

 

[Lady_X]

i can be quiet too...i don't think you need to fill every moment up with noise...and i'd rather have silence then boring chit chat that i can't even pretend to care about...i like funny nonsensical stuff or real conversations...but boring stories about peoples neighbors that have nothing to do with anything...and it's not even meant to be funny...no thanks...i'll just be quiet and hope you stop talking.

 

[cherchair]

I've thought about this a lot--probably because it drives me nuts, especially the "smile" thing. I think part of it for me is that I am most likely to meet people when I'm hypomanic People seem really attracted to that. When I return to my introverted self, it causes confusion and concern--and unless there's some real foundation for a friendship--it's usually the end of the relationship.

With close friends I'm usually pretty engaging, so when I'm quiet, I get questions like "Are you starting to get depressed?" when in fact it's just that I'm more contemplative than usual. At least they don't tell me to smile.

I was initially drawn to my first EH because he seemed so comfortable with silence and never made small talk. We were about a year into the marriage before I realized he had nothing to say...about anything.