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  1. #311
    unscannable Tigerlily's Avatar
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    Athenian I'm fine. Heart, yes after this post I gave this thread some thought, had a laugh with thatgirl and got decided that she is right to a point, disregarded the post and moved forward. As a feeler I sometimes take things personally as well. I have fought this the last 20 years of my life because I hate how I feel when I think that people are zeroing in on me and I go into attack mode. At this point in my life (almost 39), I know it's silly to care what strangers think about me (or my type) but it still creeps in now and then and I hate it. Thankfully for me my INTJ husband has rubbed off (perv ;P) on me over the years and I appreciate his alternate view on things which has helped me tremendously in dealing with people in my leisure and work life. Whenever I start to feel myself becoming emotional, I try and step back and put things into perspective and try and respond in a less emotional way. In this case I stepped back and read some of my favorite thinkers and feelers posts and realized that this is indeed just a discussion and that TG was just trying to understand.

    Also in response to my earlier post where I semi lashed out at thatgirl, that was just me not wanting to miss out on any action announcing my presence. I realize now how confusing that must have been so next time I'll just post a picture of me saying to avoid any inconstancies and/or confusion.
    Time is a delicate mistress.

  2. #312
    Don't Judge Me! Haphazard's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jen View Post
    A At this point in my life (almost 39), I know it's silly to care what strangers think about me (or my type) but it still creeps in now and then and I hate it. Thankfully for me my INTJ husband has rubbed off (perv ;P) on me over the years and I appreciate his alternate view on things which has helped me tremendously in dealing with people in my leisure and work life.
    Isn't it supposed to be the other way around?
    -Carefully taking sips from the Fire Hose of Knowledge

  3. #313
    Senior Member SquirrelTao's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Haphazard View Post
    Speak for yourself, squirrel.
    Actually, I was

  4. #314
    Senior Member SquirrelTao's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jen View Post
    what what?
    Let me see if I can slow down and be more clear. You had asked if you're the only one who likes for discussions to get more productive than narrow debates in which the posters try to prove each other wrong. Since I have made several posts in this thread that have not been up to the high standard to which you want to hold all NFs, I thought I might respond to you. I was letting you know that I also enjoy the type of discussion that you say you like best. But in my experience it is enervating for me to try to set my energies against the tide, if the people who hold differing views than me do not approach the discussion in the spirit of sincere and productive dialogue. I therefore felt confronted with the choice either not to participate, or just to have a little fun. ThatGirl and BW were provocative to me, so I wanted to participate. The choice to have a little fun was energizing rather than enervating.

  5. #315
    unscannable Tigerlily's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Haphazard View Post
    Isn't it supposed to be the other way around?
    Oh don't worry, I rub up all over him as well.
    Quote Originally Posted by SquirrelTao View Post
    Let me see if I can slow down and be more clear. You had asked if you're the only one who likes for discussions to get more productive than narrow debates in which the posters try to prove each other wrong. Since I have made several posts in this thread that have not been up to the high standard to which you want to hold all NFs, I thought I might respond to you. I was letting you know that I also enjoy the type of discussion that you say you like best. But in my experience it is enervating for me to try to set my energies against the tide, if the people who hold differing views than me do not approach the discussion in the spirit of sincere and productive dialogue. I therefore felt confronted with the choice either not to participate, or just to have a little fun. ThatGirl and BW were provocative to me, so I wanted to participate. The choice to have a little fun was energizing rather than enervating.
    Well, did you at least have fun?
    Time is a delicate mistress.

  6. #316
    Senior Member SquirrelTao's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jen View Post
    Well, did you at least have fun?
    Heh, in moderate amounts, though I wish that dastardly BlueWing would engage me in more debate. I think he is the perfect debate partner I have been looking for my whole life

  7. #317
    unscannable Tigerlily's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SquirrelTao View Post
    Heh, in moderate amounts, though I wish that dastardly BlueWing would engage me in more debate. I think he is the perfect debate partner I have been looking for my whole life
    Hey, he could be the one. BW if you're reading this at least meet this nice female half way. Let me know if you need any guidance in the hooking up dept.
    Time is a delicate mistress.

  8. #318
    Senior Member SquirrelTao's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jen View Post
    Hey, he could be the one. BW if you're reading this at least meet this nice female half way. Let me know if you need any guidance in the hooking up dept.
    Well, I'm married, but I have been looking all my life for the perfect debating partner. A perfect debating partner would be challenging, would be arrogant enough so that I would not feel guilty if I unleashed the full intensity of my mind, would never want to give up, would like to argue about the kinds of topics that interest me, and would ...

    In real life, however, I have found that all the verbiage inevitably reaches the point of diminishing returns. I've also found that my mood and motivation changes, so that if I'm having fun, it never continues long before I feel guilty or get bored or something else to spoil the fun. I have thus given up on ever having the perfect debate. BlueWing did almost make the dream come alive again, though.

  9. #319
    Senior Member Sunshine's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ThatGirl View Post
    First of all don't be offended by the title I just thought it was funny.

    F people creep me out. I don't understand them. I see making decisions off of your feelings as selfish and irrisponsible. The worst excuse ever, "I felt like it", like that matters. If people justify their actions according to their feelings where is the line that says what you were feeling is wrong. It seems immature. How is putting your feelings on someone else productive to anything? Where is the self control? You cant argue against what someone is feeling and asking someone to take your feelings into account is like asking them to cater unobjectively to you.

    I am not trying to make people mad here I am trying to understand. What makes you all tick?

    How come the title is about unhealthy F-ers but then this is about F-ers in general?

  10. #320
    mrs disregard's Avatar
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    Because the thread was originally titled "Why F-ers give me the creeps" and a moderator or the OP herself changed it after it became apparent that the object of the OP's contempt was not, in fact, the so-called "feeling judgment", but rather immature, unhealthy emotionality in others, which, as we all know, can be found in feelers as well as thinkers.

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