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Thread: Maturity

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    Default Maturity

    I was told by a friend 16 years younger that I'm immature because I talk like I'm his age. It's kind of an inkling I had so it rang true. Why do some people seem to start out immature and progress through maturity while others may just stay at the same level - not necessarily starting out immature and not necessarily progressing. People used to think I was mature for my age so it just seems like it stayed steady and never changed. Any other INFJs relate? I don't drink or do any drugs so that is not a factor. I'd like to mature.

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    Quote Originally Posted by NancyD View Post
    I was told by a friend 16 years younger that I'm immature because I talk like I'm his age. It's kind of an inkling I had so it rang true. Why do some people seem to start out immature and progress through maturity while others may just stay at the same level - not necessarily starting out immature and not necessarily progressing. People used to think I was mature for my age so it just seems like it stayed steady and never changed. Any other INFJs relate? I don't drink or do any drugs so that is not a factor. I'd like to mature.
    What would you like to mature into?

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    I don't know. Maturity has always been a confusing topic for me. I used to not be concerned with it at all. I thought it had no importance. However, younger people can seem wiser to me some times. Actually, I just remembered that I read maturity is a myth among many myths our society creates. That was in a book by Malcolm Gladwell. If I had remembered that earlier, I would not have made the thread. haha.

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    Quote Originally Posted by NancyD View Post
    I don't know. Maturity has always been a confusing topic for me. I used to not be concerned with it at all. I thought it had no importance. However, younger people can seem wiser to me some times. Actually, I just remembered that I read maturity is a myth among many myths our society creates. That was in a book by Malcolm Gladwell. If I had remembered that earlier, I would not have made the thread. haha.
    We live in a society that worships youth, in part because they are a demographic with cash.

    Of course it is worse for women who are valued for their youth and fertility.

    This leads to the Peter Pan syndrome where we want to be young forever. But the only way to be young forever is to die young.

    Introverts have the possibility of maturing into their full gifts. Introverts have the possibility of flowering into maturity.

    And an important path to maturity for introverts is to practice systematic relaxation. A good place to start is Ainslie Mears' book Relief Without Drugs.

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    poor extroverts, they will never understand

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    No, it's not Peter Pan syndrome. I don't try not to mature. That idea is very odd to me.

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    Could you please give some more examples of ways in which you think you are immature, or which other people have accused you of being immature?

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    Well, I really don't know because I don't know what it is like to be other people, of course. I think because I'm not the type to get married and have kids, people may think I'm immature because I don't have marriage and kid concerns? One person said something like that. That is not a Peter Pan issue. I know the world is overpopulated so I would never do something as illogical as bring more people into the world. Also, I don't like the idea of a relationship having a contract with the state. So, I don't feel those are immaturity issues.

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    Senior Member Studmuffin23's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by NancyD View Post
    I was told by a friend 16 years younger that I'm immature because I talk like I'm his age. It's kind of an inkling I had so it rang true. Why do some people seem to start out immature and progress through maturity while others may just stay at the same level - not necessarily starting out immature and not necessarily progressing. People used to think I was mature for my age so it just seems like it stayed steady and never changed. Any other INFJs relate? I don't drink or do any drugs so that is not a factor. I'd like to mature.
    You're not one bit immature, from what you've shared. Acting younger than their age is pretty typical for INFJs

    INFJ adults are frequently described as "great big teen-agers" by people. And based on the interactions I've had with fellow INFJs, I must agree with this observation. It's one of the things that separates them from their INFP cousins.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Studmuffin23 View Post
    You're not one bit immature, from what you've shared. Acting younger than their age is pretty typical for INFJs

    INFJ adults are frequently described as "great big teen-agers" by people. And based on the interactions I've had with fellow INFJs, I must agree with this observation. It's one of the things that separates them from their INFP cousins.
    That's good to know. Thanks. (I hope you weren't being sarcastic. ha!) I never heard of the "big teenager" thing before.
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