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Thread: INFJs as kids

  1. #11
    Symbolic Herald Vasilisa's Avatar
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    I will return to this thread, but in the meantime I will repost something from the NF Play thread:

    Quote Originally Posted by Vasilisa View Post
    A great deal of imaginative play by myself. Time spent reading fairytales and folktales and all manner of stories, and then playing in my world in which all those magic possibilities existed. I liked to play with dolls, especially creating their environment, kind of perfecting it, and thinking up their personalities, names, how they fit into this little world. I played with stuffed animals, too, and even though I knew in my heart that I liked some more than others, I felt that it would be hurtful to let on, so I tried to show everyone of them love and appreciation. I enjoyed reading and creative writing from a really young age. I liked to draw stories. I was so private about my writing and drawings. If someone in my family read them, even with praise, I felt violated. Playing dress up was fun, and I enjoyed making up my own songs on my instruments and playing with my tape recorder. But it wasn't an interest rooted in a desire to perform really.

    When my brother deigned to play with me, I would obviously go along with whatever he wanted to do and just enjoy his presence. We played little dungeons and dragons type games, board games in which he showed me no mercy ever, legos - with which he was amazing at creating designs with no instructions, and video games. He would wrestle me, too, in that big brother way, and we swam quite a bit.
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  2. #12
    Sweet Ocean Cloud SD45T-2's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Vasilisa View Post
    I will return to this thread
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  3. #13
    Iron Maiden fidelia's Avatar
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    As a child, I received my sense of security from being near my family. All of my old drawings were addressed to my family, and I took great pleasure as a little kid in listing everyone's names and ages on the corner. I had a lot of fears that were founded in events that could actually happen (even if they were unlikely) - war, separation from the people I loved, sickness/death, fire, kidnapping and so on. I loved to read. At three I had a whole crew of imaginary friends. When I was older, I received letters from a fictional elf who split his time between my aunt's house and ours (he offered to teach me how to swear and blow smoke rings), and from the tooth fairy. While I knew they didn't really exist, I enjoyed pretending that they might. I hated being rushed, especially in the morning and I needed a lot of sleep and always wanted to know what to expect. I didn't like it when my mum had to go somewhere, as she was my primary source of security. I liked to teach or help other kids in my class, even when I was in nursery school or kindergarten. Despite being a fairly easy going kid (other than worrying about things), I inexplicably developed a strong dislike or several different rather domineering classmates at various points in my growing up years. I couldn't even have said why, but the feeling was mutual, like two cats bristling at each other. I had a sense of humour that was on occasion quite funny, although unpredictably so, but there were things that I found funny, that other people wouldn't have. In retrospect, I think it came from Ni. I was very adept at making analogies and quite emotionally aware. I disliked needless conflict and wanted the people close to me to be happy. I was generous and loved shopping for presents for birthdays. I remember buying hankies in Grade 2 or 3 for our janitor, who always had a red hanky hanging out of his pocket. I usually was friends with a lot of different groups of people, although usually not best friends with any. Occasionally I did have one close friend. I tended to champion the underdog, and throughout my school years, people who didn't have support were drawn to me. I didn't tend to pick friends, so much as them picking me, which meant that I often was either friends with people others weren't, or else I was friends with people who were more dominant first borns or only children. Despite being quite transparent, I was very private and easily embarrassed, particularly in front of other people. I had an unusually huge aversion to being blamed, and a tendency to want to hide anything I felt ashamed of from the people who mattered to me, yet wanted to be totally open to them as well. My conscience was quite tender. I had strong likes and dislikes. I was tentative about trying new things, but usually liked them once I did. I had a fairly pronounced sense of personal style, even as a fairly little kid. I preferred to watch something being done until I felt comfortable participating, and needed time to prepare for most things before I'd feel good about taking part, particularly if it was in a group setting. I was a bit of a perfectionist, and wanted to know what others' expectations of me were. I had strong opinions, but I was unlikely to share them unless I knew the people around me felt the same way, or we were quite close, or there was a strong enough purpose in sharing the opinion to outweigh the possible friction it could cause. It mattered to me to be liked by my teachers. I liked home a lot and missed it when I was away, even when I was having a good time. I was attached not just to people, but to the familiar objects in my surroundings. I enjoyed games that did not involve group teams, but were dependent on individual performance, as I didn't like feeling that I had let someone down if I missed the ball or something. I enjoyed school and did quite well at it. I liked being read to, and enjoyed hearing familiar stories over and over. I also remember listening to stories my mum was reading to my much older siblings and being very engaged, despite it not being aimed at kids my age level. I was very involved with both sides of my extended family and liked knowing that I was part of something larger. I learned at a young age to give shoulder rubs and footrubs and liked doing things like that for the aunties and my grandparents. I found the stories about where different strands of our family came from interesting, and during high school transcribed all of my uncles' WWII letters home for a school project. I was fairly stubborn - not to be difficult, but I needed to know why something mattered before I'd change my mind about it and have confidence that the other person had sound reasons for asking me to make a change. As a little kid, I was very quiet in the car, and liked singing to myself or thinking. Sometimes my mum worried that they had forgotten me and would check if I was still in the backseat. I often would think about something and then out of nowwhere ask a question about it. Of course, the people around me hadn't been following my train of thinking, so it sounded kind of random, but it made perfect sense to me. I wanted to be an archeologist, teacher or a writing. I liked drawing, but hated it that it never matched what I could hazily see in my mind's eye and disliked even mucking up a piece of paper, because I was disappointed that it wouldn't turn out like I wanted it to. I liked the idea of speaking a secret language or writing in code, and as an older kid had an affinity for and interest in languages. I would also say that I wasn't shy, but was reserved, which was sometimes mistaken as shyness. However, under the right circumstances, with the right people, I got in trouble for being too chatty. When I went to camp, I wasn't homesick, but I did like having notes to open every day from my mum. As a little kid, I was quite suspicious of why people needed to know certain information about me at school (last name, father's profession, etc), as I had read a lot of books about the war and realized that sometimes information could be used in bad ways! I also liked to carry some kind of reminder of my family if I had to go to school or to something in the evening, because I was very aware that some people have left home in the past and never saw their loved ones again. When we studied fire safety at school, I was alarmed that my parents weren't too worried about making a plan, so I always had a blanket ready and my most prized possessions nearby to lower out the window, should it be necessary! I was distressed that we were not block parents, and after seeing a video at school about stranger danger, I started running across people's lawns because I was concerned that if you walked along the sidewalk, the people in the vans with the candy could get you there! I was aware that all of these fears were rather unlikely, but still possible, so I wouldn't tell anyone why I was doing those things, because I felt foolish about it. I had several prized toys - a doll and a teddy bear especially. I made up elaborate stories about them and made up conversation between us.

    This isn't very well organized and is just kind of a stream of consciousness, but hopefully there's something helpful there.
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    I've been following this thread and I feel like many of these comments could've been written myself to describe my own childhood experience.

    I'm not trying to stir shit up or create drama, but if this is the case, then many of these experiences can't be exclusive to INFJ children.

  5. #15
    Senior Member Ene's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Starcrash View Post
    I've been following this thread and I feel like many of these comments could've been written myself to describe my own childhood experience.

    I'm not trying to stir shit up or create drama, but if this is the case, then many of these experiences can't be exclusive to INFJ children.
    I'd say that you're right. Many of the experiences are NOT exclusive.
    A student said to his master: "You teach me fighting, but you talk about peace. How do you reconcile the two?" The master replied: "It is better to be a warrior in a garden than to be a gardener in a war." - unknown/Chinese

    http://www.typologycentral.com/forum...=61024&page=14

  6. #16
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ene View Post
    I'd say that you're right. Many of the experiences are NOT exclusive.
    That's the problem with MBTI. Or one of the many problems.

  7. #17
    Senior Member Ene's Avatar
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    Could it be that none of us are as unique as we think we are? LOL.
    A student said to his master: "You teach me fighting, but you talk about peace. How do you reconcile the two?" The master replied: "It is better to be a warrior in a garden than to be a gardener in a war." - unknown/Chinese

    http://www.typologycentral.com/forum...=61024&page=14
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  8. #18
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ene View Post
    Could it be that none of us are as unique as we think we are? LOL.
    No, just more heavily concentrated in this type of forum. Nothing wrong with that.

  9. #19
    can't handcuff the wind Z Buck McFate's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Starcrash View Post
    I've been following this thread and I feel like many of these comments could've been written myself to describe my own childhood experience.

    I'm not trying to stir shit up or create drama, but if this is the case, then many of these experiences can't be exclusive to INFJ children.

    I think it's good to hear outside opinion about this & what doesn't seem particularly like an INFJ trait- that's kinda (imo) the point of having this discussion on a forum. That, in itself, is not what causes the drama.

    It's a shame those links about different types' childhoods have been disabled, because it would be interesting to compare. Something tells me that if people were to look at a few different pages (for comparison) then it would become apparent that- while we all can usually relate *somewhat* to what other types find challenging- there will be a list of challenges that resonate more than others. I have no doubt that lots of people can relate to that list of things about Ni dom children- but I think the real question is whether they'd relate to their own type's list more.
    Reality is a collective hunch. -Lily Tomlin

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  10. #20
    Senior Member Ene's Avatar
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    ^Good points. It would be interesting to have the pages for comparison.
    A student said to his master: "You teach me fighting, but you talk about peace. How do you reconcile the two?" The master replied: "It is better to be a warrior in a garden than to be a gardener in a war." - unknown/Chinese

    http://www.typologycentral.com/forum...=61024&page=14

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