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  1. #11
    Iron Maiden fidelia's Avatar
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    Oh yeah - I also don't bail on plans with someone if I know they're counting on me. However, if it seems that they already have people to hang out with and my presence isn't critical, I often don't end up texting people to go and do something. I tend to stay in as a default, but even when I do go out, it happens more often at the last minute, rather than committing to something way ahead of time.
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  2. #12
    Senior Member riva's Avatar
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    They need to feel inspired.

    Common NF curse.
    .
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  3. #13
    Senior Member ceecee's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by riva View Post
    They need to feel inspired.

    Common NF curse.
    But it's very easy to say or text - I'll answer as soon as I have a minute. My ENFJ did this a lot but he thought I would be offended if he texted me anything like the above.
    I like to rock n' roll all night and *part* of every day. I usually have errands... I can only rock from like 1-3.

  4. #14
    Senior Member cm81's Avatar
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    Read this succinct little gem on Facebook earlier today...

    "INFJ's are more like innocuous little stars, burning up their own cores until they put together the right compounds to go supernova "
    "The true genius shudders at incompleteness, preferring silence to everything that it should be." Edgar Allen Poe

    "There's a magic inside,
    Just waiting to burst out.
    There world is a goldmine-
    That will melt tomorrow."M83
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  5. #15
    You have a choice! 21%'s Avatar
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    Unless you are in the ultimate innermost circle where I can be really vulnerable with, I need a long time to think about a good response, so if I don't text back immediately or at all it's usually because:

    1) I'm thinking about an appropriate response. If you want to hang out, I need to check with everybody else that there isn't anything important to be done at that time. (Or that I would be requiring 'alone time' at that time)
    2) I don't want to hang out but don't know how to say no so I keep putting off replying because it is stressful.
    3) I thought that was simply a 'what's up' text that didn't need responding to.
    4) I'm having a very low energy moment and I cannot deal with the outside world at all.
    5) I said I would text/make plans as part of 'polite social etiquette' with no real intention to do so (e.g. when you run into classmates it is considered polite in my circles to say things like 'let's have a get-together sometime!' or 'I'll be in touch!' -- but no one really means that)

    Most of the time if I care about you you will be in my private thoughts in a private moment and I'll send loads of good wishes your way. Real life contact is not really necessary.
    4w5 sp/sx EII

  6. #16
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    Quote Originally Posted by fidelia View Post
    If it requires decision making that I don't have the answers for right away, I tend to put off replying and then forget about it sometimes. I also postpone replying if the response matters a lot to me and I want to do a thorough job of replying but don't have time to properly do it right then. Then my response gets old and I feel guilty and it gets delayed further. Texts are usually something that I check when I'm busy and so sometimes don't think of replying again until later when I see the text later. In any case, it's rarely about me not caring about the other person and has more to do with my own indecision or distraction.
    I'm with you on that one. Generally I'm the one that respond back whenever I have the chance. I get it. Life is busy but if you can check facebook for a couple of minutes, I'm sure texting back with "busy" or "text you later" isn't all that hard. Constant leaving me hanging for days communicates to me that you're not that reliable. I'll do a friendly reminder but I'm moving on after that.

  7. #17
    Iron Maiden fidelia's Avatar
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    Mostly, I make it clear to people that texting is not as good as calling me directly or emailing. I seem to do better with that. I also don't leave people hanging on stuff that really matters.
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  8. #18
    The Memes Justify the End EcK's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by fidelia View Post
    Mostly, I make it clear to people that texting is not as good as calling me directly or emailing. I seem to do better with that. I also don't leave people hanging on stuff that really matters.
    U never got back to me on that marriage proposal
    Expression of the post modern paradox : "For the love of god, religions are so full of shit"

    Theory is always superseded by Fact...
    ... In theory.

    “I’d hate to die twice. It’s so boring.”
    Richard Feynman's last recorded words

    "Great is the human who has not lost his childlike heart."
    Mencius (Meng-Tse), 4th century BCE
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  9. #19
    Senior Member riva's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by EcK View Post
    U never got back to me on that marriage proposal
    Many people have given up already.
    .

  10. #20
    Honeyed Water thoughtlost's Avatar
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    I highly doubt that this is purely an INFJ thing ...because literally everyone does this to me. And I am not lying. Every single person (besides my immediate family ...and I am more likely to ignore my family vice versa) does this, so they cannot all be INFJs. It doesn't matter what I say. I text something as simple as "where did you buy your computer" .....and they will take two days to respond ...even when it's on facebook and you know they have seen the freakishly simple message. And when people do respond to my messages, it is short one word responses, so why did it take THAT long to say "best buy"

    So the highly convoluted explanations that you INFJs and other people are posting here never makes any sense to me. I don't see how it REQUIRES more than two weeks to tell me "No, I cannot come over today. Next time (or maybe what they wanted to say was ...I hate you stop talking to me ...in that case, I can understand why you wouldn't want to respond at all)." Like I am not lying, this girl literally took more than two weeks to tell me she could not come over. I have a friend who takes much longer (like, a month and more) to respond to any messages. Doesn't matter how simple.

    I only know of one person who responds within 10 minutes, but she hates me now, so no more responses (and if she does, it is very ...polite...) I have another friend who responds within 5-8 hours.

    I am getting tired of it because it is this happens too often and by too many people for me to say "hey maybe this person is just having a bad day" So I will: 1.) be more responsive to people myself 2.) Stop wanting to interact with unresponsive people. And so far it is sort of working but only a little; however, I have made plans to visit a friend on New Year's (....and I never make plans with people EVER ......so yay me!)


    ...I would get extremely frustrated and just say that people just don't have any time for me, but maybe it's actually because I don't really invest time and genuine interest/care in others because I think any interest someone has in me is fake/polite. That, and MOST people are extremely boring. In my case, the lack of people who care to respond to me is mostly my fault.
    You are so arbitrary.

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