I find characteristics about certain types more attractive than others. However, I tend to agree that "individuals are sexy. Not types." I agree with that statement because I myself do NOT fit the INFP/ENFP 'type' mold perfectly.
Do I personally find INFP males sexy? Tough question, I can't answer that. Everybody is different and I don't believe people can be pefectly typed. If an INFP male fits the exact definition of an INFP, then NO, I would not find that too sexy in a male because I don't like cheesy/sappy romance , I don't like answering a bunch of emotional questions about how I'm feeling , I don't like hearing a man tell me too much emotional stuff about how he's feeling , I believe that too much "talk is cheap" without actions to support it, etc, etc, etc.
Last edited by A window to the soul; 12-17-2009 at 12:18 PM.
i feel like a douchephag relating this to myself, but whatevs.
ive been quite the ladies man throughout my years in school, [not trying to toot my own horn] but its just like girls always see me as just a 'cute, innocent, pure' kinda person. its like girls seem to just want to look and gawk at me, but not be involved. ive actually been told i was too perfect. ive been beating around the bush of multiple relationships in my life and was left each time for a boy who was more visceral in his imperfections and spontaneity.
i think infp's can come off this 'too perfect' way alot, as their introversion and sensitivity just seems so intriguingly innocent.
Oooohhh. So that's why nobody's asking me out. hahaha
hahaha, well, im glad i could make you feel that way.. but i didnt intend to flatter anyone or create a surperior type, i just meant its how infp's come off, as pure and innocent. at least all the infp's i know. not perfect in the sense of every single aspect, perfect in the sense of being pure and innocent, ie appearing to have a clean slate so to say.
^ Yeah, I know, I was just joking. I definitely don't feel flattered or think we're superior or perfect or anything like that. (I think I understand what you mean about the pure and innocent thing. I think that my other INFP friend and I get that a lot too.)
Thus, the distinction between a good cause and a bad cause is not based on any objective criteria (that is the business of Thinking!) but based on what 'feels good', hence, whatever agrees with the INFP's instincts is good and what does not, is not.
There is very little by way of sincerity with regard to how this type functions, contrary to what appears to be the case on a very superficial level. The INFP is driven to please others in order to be in harmony with them.
For this reason, the INFP engages the emotions of others for self-serving ends, strictly to receive positive emotion in return.
One may be attracted to the INFP based on what they appear to be on the surface, specifically, deep and highly emotionally sensitive. Deep? There is depth of sentiment no doubt, but can we regard this as legitimate depth as such a quality is associated with a virtue of character? Not at all, as the causes the INFP fights for are not deep at all, because the causes are determined by Thinking (as Thinking decides what the world is) because Thinking is very primitive and subordinate to the impulses of the INFP, the causes this type feels passionate about are often unremarkable at best, and opprobrious at worst. The 'INFPs versus the ESTJs' myspace group is the case in point. One may ask, what about the INFPs who fight for the end of war, getting the homeless off the streets, or raising the salaries?
Two likely answers, either the INFPs in question have developed their Thinking (very few do, hence, the ones we have in mind here are not representative of this type) or what is much more common is, simply acting out on their Feeling which relentlessly urge them to seek approbation from others. Merely identified with the cause that others value and spoke up in their endeavor to get praise from others.
In other words, they were not fighting for anything noble, they did not even know what they were doing, they were merely acting out on their impulse to try to be liked by others, as they usually do. (The nature of Feeling strives to generate positive sentiment, therefore longs for harmony with others).
-Because point one is the case, the INFP is unable to have a clear view of who they are and how they ought to live their lives, and as a result lack a backbone. Their life tends to be an incessant overflow of torrential, self-serving and in almost all notable respects vulgar passion.
*This post was about applied typology, not pure typology. In other words, it is not about the unconscious tendencies of the INFP, but about how a typical INFP tends to be. The only exception to the above is the case of the INFP with a well developed Thinking faculty which is indeed rare.
While this post may have raised some points to ponder on, I do think the poster has misunderstood us.
As an INFP... while I do like to go with what feels righ, what feels right is often what my thinking has said to be right and is morally right. If our value systems goes against what is socially right because we are fighting for the greater good then so be it....we definately do not do things to please others, quite the contrary.
Although our thinking may be our least developed faculty, it still exists and so even with those INFPs who have a tiny atom of it, they too still have the capacity to use their thinking even if it may be hard. With the exception of experiencing strong and passionate feelings whereby our thinking faculty ceases to exist..I would say INFPs with a strong tertiary Thinking faculty are numerous in numbers and not 'rare' as mentioned in the above quote.