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  1. #41
    Senior Member Rachelinpa's Avatar
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    I hate hate HATE the whole "game" thing and mostly say I refuse to play but I guess I have to. I'll be sooo glad when I am in a serious relationship and don't have to worry about it anymore.
    Amen.

  2. #42
    Senior Member Cality's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by CzeCze View Post
    Don't worry ENFPs, you'll flip the switch one of these days and become an extroverted love machine.

    Don't worry.

    Hahahaahah.

    Srsly though, I am the flip opposite but only after making the concerted effort and commitment to getting over the 'paralyzed to make the first move' bump. It took me a good year, honestly more like 2 years to get to the point where I am now. I am very much of the "me likey -- how you doin'?" mindset now. I like to think I'm that way about my life in general and exploring things that appeal to me.

    SOOOOOOOOO much (more) fun.
    Same here! That's why I asked about the age question!

  3. #43
    Babylon Candle Venom's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cality View Post
    Same here! That's why I asked about the age question!
    early twenties (still in college)

  4. #44
    Senior Member mlittrell's Avatar
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    ahhh yes the XNTJ sheild/guard...

  5. #45
    Senior Member Anja's Avatar
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    I think Lady Jaye was onto something when she mentioned "boundaries." Too much too soon can send out warning signals.

    Some of us may remember times when we've done this and then pulled waaaaay back out of embarrassment/sense of overexposure.

    I've grown to expect that pulling back shortly after someone shares more than I've been comfortable with.

    Not a bad thing/good thing, just poor judgement.

    It sometimes sends out signals, as well, of high expectations on their part of my own self-disclosure which can feel uncomfortable.
    "No ray of sunshine is ever lost, but the green which it awakes into existence needs time to sprout, and it is not always granted to the sower to see the harvest. All work that is worth anything is done in faith." - Albert Schweitzer

  6. #46
    Emperor/Dictator kyuuei's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Maabus1999 View Post
    Ok, I know a female ENFP who I got a long with well enough. However, I don't live near her and we decided just to write back and forth. So at one point I asked her if she was looking to talk to me on a more personal nature or just stay in touch. Her response, besides a bunch of other sections bouncing all over the place(which ended with yes, let's talk), was to write 2 pages of her journal to me since she wasn't at home and it would give me a chance to know what/how she think and to get some inner insight.

    Now I have my own thoughts on this, my INTJ thoughts:, but what do the female ENFPs think of her actions here? I enjoy ENFP personalities but am also a little leery at times, as this sorta surprised me. Have to stay on guard!
    I know I personally find one way of explaining something and I stick to it like glue.. I've a VERY private person, and I tend to hide my written and personal thoughts in layers of security, it's a really good sign for you that she's opening up to you. Sometimes ENFP's get scared that if they reveal too much people will lose interest in them, so they keep pieces of themselves from being out, which is another reason why I believe its a good sign that she's opening up to you, it seems as if she doesn't have that fear of losing your interest in her.

    I got off topic! She probably wrote something that explained herself as best as she'll get it, and so that is what she is using to show you.. we hate having to explain ourselves, which is funny since that's all we seem to do is end up explaining our words or actions that are commonly misinterpreted.

  7. #47
    Senior Member Maabus1999's Avatar
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    Necro thread!

    What Anja said I think is correct. I noticed a pull back, mainly cause I think she took something I said the wrong way in a critical way. Too bad it was more of trying to explain myself. Ha! Trying to figure out people as an INTJ is a challenge! "I didn't mean that...wtf?" We'll see how this goes, but yeah when people get in moods, I just give them some time after I attempt to reclarify and apologize if something "bugged" them, just to see if they recover by themselves, and if not... Um yeah, no long term drama for me. Not worth it when I have others more willing not to cause it.

    At least not at the start...

    People...why can't they just be laid back and not take to offense to anything like me? Makes me a politeness freak because of this fact.

  8. #48
    Senior Member Anja's Avatar
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    Ah. Oh dear.

    My point, though, Maabus, is that it may not be about you at all.
    "No ray of sunshine is ever lost, but the green which it awakes into existence needs time to sprout, and it is not always granted to the sower to see the harvest. All work that is worth anything is done in faith." - Albert Schweitzer

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