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  1. #21
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    You went off on an off topic tangent justifying your beliefs when all I did was stimulate discussion, as well as point out flaws in the OPs ideaology, which is something he wanted. I could write a huge essay as to why abstinance is not a good decision, but your entire arguement is based around SEX IS BAD BECAUSE SEX IS BAD!

    One topic I'd like to hit, however: As for the recent increase in divorce rates, miserable, terrible marriages have been the norm for..ever. The more you associate with people (much) older than yourself, the more you'll realize this!! It's simply that people nowadays do not find living an unfulfilling marriage ~for the rest of their life~ attractive!

    I agree!

    EDIT: This post is way too serious!!

    I love all my fellow idealists even when I want to strangle them because of their ideals!! Hey I tell my girlfriend this all the time

  2. #22
    Senior Member Angry Ayrab's Avatar
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    I never said sex itself was bad, just sex out of wedlock is bad. The evidence is obvious, Valtrax, unwanted pregnancies, abortions, you could go on forever, or you could say use a condom but we all know how well that has been working.

    Anyway, you are right, I did hijack the the thread, I apologize, and dude I really don't mean to piss you off, just throwin out them two pennies.

  3. #23
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    Who said anything about being pissed off, It's the internet, lol

  4. #24
    Babylon Candle Venom's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by absoluteuncertainty View Post
    You went off on an off topic tangent justifying your beliefs when all I did was stimulate discussion, as well as point out flaws in the OPs ideaology, which is something he wanted. I could write a huge essay as to why abstinance is not a good decision, but your entire arguement is based around SEX IS BAD BECAUSE SEX IS BAD!

    One topic I'd like to hit, however: As for the recent increase in divorce rates, miserable, terrible marriages have been the norm for..ever. The more you associate with people (much) older than yourself, the more you'll realize this!! It's simply that people nowadays do not find living an unfulfilling marriage ~for the rest of their life~ attractive!

    I agree!

    EDIT: This post is way too serious!!

    I love all my fellow idealists even when I want to strangle them because of their ideals!! Hey I tell my girlfriend this all the time
    1. i think there is merit to a "hold off on the sex for a while". it should come later on in the relationship. you do literally become HIGH off your partner! oxytocin is a BONDING HORMONE that literally makes you want to see past their flaws and just "be oh so ONE with them..."

    i cant remember where i found it, but it was a study comparing couples who had gone out for more than a year...and eventually broke up (not including marriages/divorces):

    -the couples who had started having sex within the first 6 months generally continued these eventaully "broken" relationships for much longer than the other eventually doomed relationships.

    the results were not to say that if you have sex, your relationship will fail, but to say that if it was meant to fail from day one, sex will keep you stuck in that bad relationship longer than you otherwise should have/would have.


    the biggest problem with waiting for marriage is for the guys. girls, i dont think any guy will care in a bad way that you're a virgin! For the guys though,...come on...you NEED some experience! you want to be good enough by the times you meet someone you actually want to impress! it would be terrible for an otherwise great thing to be ruined by inexperience (and yes bad sex CAN ruin a relationship....i swear im not refering to my own relationships ....)


    2. there is also something to be said for how it works "today":
    "you're hot", "so are you" --> sleep together -->sleep together often enough-->i guess we're together?!--> hang out more and actaully start to get to know the other persons flaws --> they stay together for the sex


    3. also. some people wont even consider it a relationship unless there is sex involved! To them anything relationship that didnt get to sex was just "oh ya i kinda thought he was hot, but that did GO ANYWHERE". notice the key words: GO ANYWHERE. people today literally judge the progress of a relationship based on the sex! so while you're right that divorce rates really arent that much different than the discontent rates probably were before divorce was socially acceptable, there is a change happening in society that is on the whole disturbing.

  5. #25

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    I went out with a ENFP tonight.

    Be still my racing heart. I've never had someone so completely understand everything and likewise understand the other party. I mean my best friend is supposedly an ENFP (though most of the time I think he is just way too wrapped up in himself to be) but this was a whole other level of awesome. This chick got me and we couldn't stop talking, leaving her apartment was one of the most difficult things I've done in a long time. There was nothing physical, no talk of a relationship outside her telling me on several occasions that I am her new favorite person and that we're going to be hanging out alot.

    Even when I left I called her to say "Hey I want to talk more" and she concurred and so we did, as she was walking back to her apartment from letting me out of the gate. Then I heard her yell 'HEY' and the phone went dead, so I did what any good ENFP would do and I flipped a U and zoomed back. Jumped the gate and ran to her apartment to find that her phone had just gone dead. She thought it was both hilarious and adorable and we ended up talking for another hour.

    Amazing.

    I think ENFP relationships are king. We'll see where it goes but if I know her like I think I do, then we are both in for a very exciting ride.

  6. #26
    mountain surfing nomadic's Avatar
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    ^ sounds pretty cool. good luck man~ wish u the best

    Quote Originally Posted by Angry Ayrab View Post
    Suppressing sex till marriage is trouble? How would you know? It seems kinda obvious that you haven't experienced holding off till your married, so how would you know its a big problem for all of us that are holding off?
    yeah i actually in a weird way, I actually have a lot of respect for people who do wait until marriage. guys and girls.

  7. #27
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    To AngryAryab; keep fighting man, I agree with everything you said completely.
    To FindtheJake; PAVE THE WAY MAN!!! I'm sooooo happy for you dude. That's awesome!
    To Everyone Else; this thread is mine; if I thought it was hijacked, I would've found a way to delete it, but as it stands...this is exactly the discussion I hoped would happen.

    Hey, as for guys; if you really wanna "know what you're doing" while actually wanting to abstain, that's why you start reading after you marry her (reading, not porn) and you are going to be bad at it the first night anyway; half the fun is learning together...if she's not a slut and really does love you, she'll accept you and your experience level!
    Friends don't let friends park; accidents cause people.

  8. #28
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    Also, I'm back at work today, so I'm going to talk to her more at some point and invite her to my birthday party; wish me luck!
    Friends don't let friends park; accidents cause people.

  9. #29
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    lol, Triple post: Word up to the Socionics short definition of the ENFP: THE PSYCHOLOGIST!!!
    Friends don't let friends park; accidents cause people.

  10. #30
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    Quote Originally Posted by Modern Nomad View Post
    ^ sounds pretty cool. good luck man~ wish u the best



    yeah i actually in a weird way, I actually have a lot of respect for people who do wait until marriage. guys and girls.
    Well...quadruple post, Thanks man, I appreciate the support.
    Friends don't let friends park; accidents cause people.

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