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  1. #121
    Senior Member Kyrielle's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Antisocial one View Post
    Question

    If someone accuses you that you apologize too much, do you apologize to other person because of that?
    Done that. My friend who said that looked like he was about to implode from frustration. On the inside, I laughed.
    "I took the one less traveled by,
    And that has made all the difference."

    Robert Frost

  2. #122
    nevermore lane777's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by FineLine View Post
    I don't apologize as much as some NFs. But I'll willingly and happily abandon an argument upon encountering a little push-back.

    I'll usually give one run-through of my side of the argument; if my position doesn't get any traction with the other party, then I'll drop it. I'm not going to spend a day typing messages to a stranger trying to tell him something he doesn't want to hear.

    Arguing is a low priority with me. If anything, I need the other party to evince some obvious openmindedness and desire to hear more before I'll invest time and energy in an exchange.

    Also, I don't feel bad backing off an argument. There's no loss of pride there. Since arguing is a low priority, my self-esteem isn't invested in the idea of winning or losing arguments.

    FL
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    To die would be an awfully big adventure - Peter Pan

    INFJ ~ 4w5 sp/sx ~ RLOAI ~ Inclusion e/w=1/0 (Melancholy Compulsive) Control: e/w=0/6 (Supine) Affection: e/w=4/0 (Phlegmatic Melancholy)

  3. #123
    Revelation Lauren Ashley's Avatar
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    I apologize online sometimes, but I almost never apologize in real life. Offline I am more dismissive and aggressive in arguments.

  4. #124
    Senior Member GinKuusouka's Avatar
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    I apologize a lot more often online than I do off. Online it's easier to confuse things because of the lack of voice tone to give way the emotion behind what is being said. I also will apologize more frequently online than off because I wish to avoid confrontations (and the more cantankerous people) before one is started. It may depend on how strongly I feel about a subject on how much I shall fight, if necessary.
    I have no idea who I am. All I can say is let's rock hard.

  5. #125
    Senior Member Nillerz's Avatar
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    Sorry, our bad.

  6. #126
    Senior Member quietmusician's Avatar
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    I like making sure that no one felt turned off by what I've said. So I do back track and use different words to describe what I'm saying. I don't want anyone to think I don't care.

  7. #127
    Queen hunter Virtual ghost's Avatar
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    I will resurrect this one.

    Is this a defensive mechanism that has almost nothing with other people?
    For example you know that the other person is not hurt but you will say you are sorry because of your own feeling.

  8. #128
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    Quote Originally Posted by Antisocial one View Post
    Is this a defensive mechanism that has almost nothing with other people?
    For example you know that the other person is not hurt but you will say you are sorry because of your own feeling.
    You kind of phrase this as if nobody ever gets hurt by things that are said to them.

    If I really know that they're not hurt, I probably won't bother apologizing just to assuage any negative feelings I have. But, believe it or not, people do get hurt sometimes.

    But I wouldn't doubt that I've probably sometimes apologized when I thought the other person was hurt, but it was really just my own feelings all along.. I can usually read others' reactions pretty well, but I guess it can be somewhat difficult to separate my feelings from theirs at times.

  9. #129
    mod love baby... Lady_X's Avatar
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    i never apologize if i'm certain the other person wasn't offended...but i'm also aware of how often people keep things to themselves and i hate the idea of someone being upset and pretending not to be but then decides to be secretly mad at me about it...but most people really won't tell you...i don't know why...i just say it...i have no problem saying hey screw you that was rude as hell...i just like to get things sorted out so there's no misunderstanding...if other people would it would make it much easier for me and i wouldn't have to assume shit all the time...so really it's YOUR fault...haha
    There can’t be any large-scale revolution until there’s a personal revolution, on an individual level. It’s got to happen inside first.
    -Jim Morrison

  10. #130
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    Quote Originally Posted by erinavery View Post
    i never apologize if i'm certain the other person wasn't offended...but i'm also aware of how often people keep things to themselves and i hate the idea of someone being upset and pretending not to be but then decides to be secretly mad at me about it...but most people really won't tell you...i don't know why...i just say it...i have no problem saying hey screw you that was rude as hell...i just like to get things sorted out so there's no misunderstanding...if other people would it would make it much easier for me and i wouldn't have to assume shit all the time...so really it's YOUR fault...haha
    Damn skippy!

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