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  1. #101
    The High Priestess Amargith's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Synarch View Post
    Conflict can be healthy, though!
    No doubt, but the manner in which it is done, can make it a lot less painful
    I have no problem exchanging points of view as it might enrich my own, but as soon as it becomes negative instead of positive feedback, I will appologize and back away, as I assume that I've somehow violated your borders. If you in turn violate mine, there's no room left for curiosity. Respecting each others space is far more condusive (sp?) than make people back up into a defensive little corner. If you do by accident feel you've violated them and a sorry can rectify that, you can continue your conversation on neutral territory.
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  2. #102
    Senior Member Darjur's Avatar
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    I can't seem to understand why do the NF's seem to like NTs so much? I gained a feeling just now, that I'm completely annihilating their self worth all the time I'm talking to them.

    Perhaps all of the NF's I know are masochists?

  3. #103
    Once Was Synarch's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Darjur View Post
    I can't seem to understand why do the NF's seem to like NTs so much? I gained a feeling just now, that I'm completely annihilating their self worth all the time I'm talking to them.

    Perhaps all of the NF's I know are masochists?
    Well, they may just know you're kidding.
    "Create like a god, command like a king, work like a slave."

  4. #104
    The High Priestess Amargith's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Darjur View Post
    I can't seem to understand why do the NF's seem to like NTs so much? I gained a feeling just now, that I'm completely annihilating their self worth all the time I'm talking to them.

    Perhaps all of the NF's I know are masochists?
    We love you because you're different. And if we know you well enough then we can 'acclimatize' to your kind of expression, which causes us to react less strongly. Also, we love your dry humor and intelligence
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    "Harm none, do as ye will”

  5. #105
    Senior Member Nonsensical's Avatar
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    Whenever something goes wrong, or someone ends up upset in anyway, or both..we, or I atleast, always feel that it's either my fault, or that we feel deeply sorry for the person, even if it's their fault..so it's our natural tendency to be sorry for a person, even if it is their fault..our feelings act, and we may not use our logical side. In other words, we don't look at it as "oh, it's their fault, so they deserve to be upset or whatever," but we feel sorry for the person, no matter the circumstances. If that at all makes sense..and if It doesn't, I'm sorry
    Is it that by its indefiniteness it shadows forth the heartless voids and immensities of the universe, and thus stabs us from behind with the thought of annihilation, when beholding the white depths of the milky way?

  6. #106

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    Quote Originally Posted by Darjur View Post
    I can't seem to understand why do the NF's seem to like NTs so much? I gained a feeling just now, that I'm completely annihilating their self worth all the time I'm talking to them.

    Perhaps all of the NF's I know are masochists?
    Actually we love arguing. Or at least ENFPs do. Maybe if you kick us in the head for a year we will see it as violating our self worth, but Fi is pretty solid. It doesn't really get shaken by much external. Questioning the very core of us or humanity is a rush which is rarely offered by the outside world. When you see ENFPs into it in arguing remember that we work contextually. What you say about certain things to do with us bears no implication of good or bad person or soul. When we get annoyed it is usually about future damage that statements can cause to others or other's potential.

    We normally apologise to clear misunderstandings with others. It is sort of a statement of I understand the mistake. If we are wrong to apologise then feel free to beat it in, rather than mimic us and make a half-hearted "don't worry" as a response.
    Freude, schöner Götterfunken Tochter aus Elysium, Wir betreten feuertrunken, Himmlische, dein Heiligtum! Deine Zauber binden wieder Was die Mode streng geteilt; Alle Menschen werden Brüder, Wo dein sanfter Flügel weilt.

  7. #107
    Shaman BlackCat's Avatar
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    I will get angry when someone questions my Fi then quickly apologise. I hate conflict and if I don't apologise then I will feel like they secretly hate me for some reason.
    () 9w8-3w4-7w6 tritype.

    sCueI (primary Inquisition)

  8. #108
    Senior Member Anja's Avatar
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    I felt so totally different and misunderstood by everyone around me as a young INFP that I developed the habit of nearly apologizing for my very existence.

    I suspect much of that was done for social comfort both in feeling accepted and also for consideration of others' feelings. I assumed everyone else felt things as intensely as I did.

    When I realized how much personal power I was giving away with this annoying habit I learned to curb the quick, "I'm sorry."
    "No ray of sunshine is ever lost, but the green which it awakes into existence needs time to sprout, and it is not always granted to the sower to see the harvest. All work that is worth anything is done in faith." - Albert Schweitzer

  9. #109
    Emperor/Dictator kyuuei's Avatar
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    =( I know I tend to apologize a lot. I get called out on it frequently.. Part of it is remnants of a time I thought I wasn't worth anything, so thus my mere presense was imposing and offensive and rude, in my mind, to everyone around me. Luckily, I've moved on to greater and better things.. The habits of old mix in with the reassurance that if I am polite when I say anything, and people are still rude back, I at least have the security of knowing I was polite.

    I have no problem saying what's on my mind, even if everyone disagrees.. but generally the times I'm not apologizing out of my ass and just conversing.. I end up being taken wrong. So to avoid those times, I simply apologize to everyone.
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  10. #110
    not to be trusted miss fortune's Avatar
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    Somehow I'm recalling that my ENFJ sister more commonly makes people appologize to her than appologizing to others....
    “Oh, we're always alright. You remember that. We happen to other people.” -Terry Pratchett

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