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  1. #1
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    Default confused 19 year old infp and a 27 year old enfj/enfp women. Girls please help.

    1.So I'm not egotistical but just to let you know for the posts sake, im either and infp or and infj, im 80% sure that im an infj now because i took a cognitive functions test and scored high on ni, fe and fi somehow, very high ti, and finally average se. Im a very mystical and spiritual person, but i love philosophies, the occult , and the history of how religion developed I've got to say i have always felt a strong connection to the 1960's counterculture because i play guitar and write songs that are blues oriented like most of the rock from that period. Im apparently funny, smart, and some people say im attractive anyways what type do you think i am. I feel like my high fi is because of my tendency to hide negative emotions And also i have alot of si because i have a huge memory bank and am very absorbent of info.
    2.The girl works for my dad as a business asset idk what. She has a business degree and is 27 years old. Shes a single mom whos husband recently started doing heroin so i assume that they are seperated because i get that vibe. One day she was in a very intense serious mood because of her husband and she started to tease me sexually and in a flirty way. This flirting continued and she would do all of the signs of body language youd expect. She would show me random things on her phone and tell me to come closer, and id stand by her chair and lean over her shoulder so our faces were close together or to give me a better look sorry for this sexual stuff but its important. i walked in one day and she just had the most sexual look ive ever seen on a womans face, like a sneer kind of but with a smile it was crazy. And i noticed her voice would change to this softer tone that was sexy i dont know why. Anyways i know its a taboo for older women to date younger but shes amazing and everything i want in a girl. Im trying to type her, im thinking Enfj because shes so expressive, like sexually and otherwise, shes not very shy. She is like two different people sometimes just like me and those two personalities were the presentable, nice, caring, very cute, and i thought she was innocent at first, very reserved and it seemed like she was prude. her alter ego who is this girl who is so talented at making men go crazy. This alter ego has no inhibitions really and is very sexual. And this sexual side of hers is what i have mostly been seeing the last few days, it increases each day. What would compel a 27 year old to be with a 19 year old? She excited me just by looking at me or talking to me. Anyways id love to date her but it would have to be a secret,We have this intense connection thats both sexual and mental. Im thinking now that i might be an infp tell me what type i am and w also my question is, does dating younger men correlate at all with enfj or enfp persoanlities? Which would do it.

  2. #2
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    More about her personality, i get the sense that she is a dominant fe type because of how expressive and emotional she is.she does go by social norms but at the same time her intuition tells her to be unique. She played sports. Shes an organizer. She has good social skills and the best flirting ive ever experienced was with her. Older women are for some reason attracted to me. Ive been with a 22 year old, had a 27 year old try to seduce me, and a waiter that flirted with me alot but not for the money. And now this girl is giving me the most mixed signals ive ever seen. She invited me to a party and i went, she said she had to trick or treat with her kids but that shed be there. And she never showed even though she sounded so excited when she invited me and that night. I dont think she would purposefully do this maybe her kids got sick or something. So enfj or enfp? And for me infj vs infp

  3. #3
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    What would compel her? Maybe she is on the rebound looking for a toy. Go in with that in mind so you don't get hurt. Enjoy yourself.

  4. #4
    Senior Member two cents's Avatar
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    Is her personality type really relevant here? The behaviors she demonstrates according to your description are mostly about being flirty with you. The fact that she was more reserved in the past and is still more reserved in other situations means that she... adjusts her behavior to the situation. I'm not aware of any Myers-Briggs type that is incapable of doing that...

    You seem to be interested in her. She seems to be interested in you. The exact reasons are her own. The age difference may matter to some people, but apparently she's cool with it. Like CapLawyer said, she could be on the rebound and looking for a toy. Nothing wrong with that if you are cool with being the toy. If she is looking for a more serious relationship, and you'd like to have one with her, her Myers-Briggs type (or yours) is hardly the only or the most important consideration when it comes to long-term compatibility. As with all relationships, proceed with caution and enjoy yourself.
    And that's my two cents on the subject.

  5. #5
    Senior Member Forever_Jung's Avatar
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    Smart, funny and attractive, eh? Yeah, sounds like you're an INFP, because that describes me to a tee.

    Yeah just joking, not a lot of this is relevant to Myers Briggs. If you're actually looking for a typing, maybe tell us more about temperament and less about dating details.

    Congratulations on starting a new relationship though, I wish you the best. You seem really excited!

  6. #6
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    ENFJ for her, given reserved outside, organization, and good socially. Not sure for you.

    Call me boring but I'd be cautious about pursuing a relationship with her. Children and a hard-drug-using husband are significant burdens. As CapLawyer pointed out, it may be that she's looking for romantic involvement outside the relationship, but that doesn't necessarily mean that she wants something lasting with you or that she has any real intention of leaving her husband. A shared workplace also makes it a bit harder. I don't want to shoot you down if you've got something good going, but I think you should be careful and realistic about the situation. You deserve a relationship where you and your partner can both be happy and healthy.

  7. #7
    Senior Member cafe's Avatar
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    I predict if you get with her you will be going for a ride on the crazy train.
    “There are two novels that can change a bookish fourteen-year old’s life: The Lord of the Rings and Atlas Shrugged. One is a childish fantasy that often engenders a lifelong obsession with its unbelievable heroes, leading to an emotionally stunted, socially crippled adulthood, unable to deal with the real world. The other, of course, involves orcs.”
    ~ John Rogers

  8. #8
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    I looked at your post and read "sex sex sex."

    Did you have a point?

  9. #9
    Sugar Hiccup OrangeAppled's Avatar
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    I'd guess an SP for the OP :X
    Often a star was waiting for you to notice it. A wave rolled toward you out of the distant past, or as you walked under an open window, a violin yielded itself to your hearing. All this was mission. But could you accomplish it? (Rilke)

    INFP | 4w5 sp/sx | RLUEI - Primary Inquisitive | Tritype is tripe

  10. #10
    Senior Member tkae.'s Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by cafe View Post
    I predict if you get with her you will be going for a ride on the crazy train.
    I second this emotion.

    It's sometimes hard to tell how age differences will affect a relationship, but when they're this big then it's pretty easy. For example, I'm 22 and the guy I'm dating just turned 18 in September. He was worried at first and lied about being a year older. We dealt with it and moved on, but I still had to think a lot about what that kind of age difference meant. We have an entire degree between us (I've graduated with a B.A. and he's a freshman), and all the time we run into little things couples of the same age wouldn't. For example, he's never seen an episode of Kenan and Kel or All That. Or Gundam Wing.

    So if four years is a potential issue, eight years is a definite issue. You're at critically different points in your lives: she already has children, a degree, IS MARRIED, etc.

    I mean, that's just talking about the age difference. That's not even mentioning all of the reasons a relationship would be absolutely insane with her.

    1.) She works for your father. I'm rusty on my sexual harassment laws, but I'm guessing it's illegal for you to be doing what you're doing with her while she's at work.

    2.) She has baggage. A troubled marriage involving children? Don't touch that with a ten foot pole.

    3.) The way you're describing her behavior leads me to believe that either her stress is manifesting itself as risky sexual behavior (sleeping with the boss's kid), she's trying to use you for emotional or sexual relief or even career advancement, that maybe she's some kind of sexual deviant/compulsive who for some reason can't run all of these factors through the filter in her brain to warn her that it's not a good idea, or you're immature in relationships and are letting your hormones head up your perception of her behavior (aka Cock > Brain Syndrome).

    Going back to the point of her age? If I'm 22 and can see these things from a description, she, with her Business degree and 5 years experience on me should know how wrong what she's doing is.

    If you're an INFP? It's easy for us to let our emotions skew what should otherwise be rational decisions. It's the Fi coming two steps before the Te. You have to ESPECIALLY be careful of that in relationships, because it's SO EASY to get caught up in a good wave and let it carry you all the way into bad waters. I also learned from my first relationship that I'm very bad about dating people with personal problems, then becoming their emotional well to leech from. Find someone who's your healthy equal, not someone who's a project that will drain you.

    Even if you're not an INFP, I'm telling you this: DO NOT TOUCH THIS. It's a bad idea on SO MANY levels.
    "Not knowing how near the truth is, we seek it far away." -Ekaku Hakuin
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