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[NF] Am I INFP or INFJ?

Doctor Cringelord

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I usually identify as INFP. I've taken the MB and Keirsey tests multiple times and this is usually my result, but there are times I've had INFJ as my outcome. Reading about them, both types seem like they fit me well, and I'm having a hard time discerning. Is it possible to be both? Or to be on the border between F and J?

I'm shitty at typing other people and myself, so perhaps some more experienced people at this forum can help me.

Also, I'm new here, so forgive me if a thread already exists for this subject.
 

Ene

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Judging from your quotes, I'd say INFP, but I realize that's not much to go on.
 

animenagai

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Have you watched this? Warning: starts with a heavy dose of sarcasm.

 

Doctor Cringelord

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That sort of helped but I need to do some more research

It refers to NJs using symbols and analogies. I'm big on analogy. I like comparing different scenarios and situations to find common patterns or occurrences. I also have a knack for memorizing things like important dates in history and obscure actors's names, or any other facts that pertain to my interests.

However I've also been known to pace a lot when talking, which he mentioned NPs do. But I will also take long pauses to think after someone asks me a question. I've noticed this often causes frustration in coworkers, managers, even family members, as they seem to perceive me as being indecisive, when I'm really just trying to work out decisions in my head before speaking.

I've also been told I express more with my eyes and brow, while the lower half of my face remains less expressive.
 

Doctor Cringelord

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One time I was out with my wife and some friends. She said something that hurt my feelings and embarrassed me. I suddenly became very quiet and sulked the rest of the night. Our friends obviously knew something was wrong and the whole mood was basically soured because I was butthurt over some stupid comment.

Would that reaction be more typical for INFP or INFJ?

Or does the fact that I was so sensitive to begin with indicate one or the other?
 

OrangeAppled

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If you are an INFJ, then you are an Introverted Intuitive Type who uses Extroverted Feeling as a secondary function.
If you are an INFP, then you are an Introverted Feeling Type who uses Extroverted Intuition as a secondary function.

Now read Jung's descriptions of each here.
I suggest reading JH Van Der Hoop's profiles also (they come up if you google it); they are a bit less dense in language but based closely on Jung's ideas.

I suggest approaching the functions as mindsets, not skill sets or traits. The profiles describe a kind of character born of a general mentality, not thinking styles one switches between to accomplish tasks. The lower functions (tertiary & inferior) are not well differentiated as cognition. They often appear as negative, childish, distorted, and/or very emotional/sentimental in a person. When appearing positively, they often have a very narrow range. The person then DOES tend to apply it to a task; it does not characterize them or dominate their mindset, and it tends to take a lot of energy & deliberate focus to use. The inferior function itself tends to rear its head as an antagonistic force in a person's mind, and when it appears in the personality, we tend to not see it as NOT being "ourselves".

---------

Concerning the video: Lady Gaga is not INFP... And builds "report" with people? Does he mean rapport? :D
And INFJs do not have "strong introverted thinking". That's their tertiary & it's being highly over-rated. To hear people talk, it may as well be their dominant.

I find it odd how the inferiors for INFJs are often interpreted positively, as if they are well-developed, whereas the inferiors for INFPs are not. Se for INFJ is discussed as if they are SPs, whereas Te for INFPs is not discussed as if they are TJs (shouldn't we be great leaders, excellent at logistics, exceptional at managing & mobilizing resources, etc?). Instead, it's often emphasized for INFPs how weak Te is. I wonder why INFJs are given such a free pass when it comes to their inferior....

I've also yet to meet an INFP who - as a part of their character - plans in details, is committed to structure/security, or follows instructions (I can personally struggle with all of those). That is Si in an SJ. Tertiary Si is more impressionistic, perhaps even sentimental. It's more about using past, sensory experiences as pieces of a collage for an idealized reality. It's also heavy on information gathering - acquainting oneself with reality through facts to store & mull over. I'm not surprised the grasp of Si & Fi is poor in that video. It has the distinct flavor of someone in love with iNtuition & who is likely a Fe user (perhaps the speaker is an ENTP...hmmm....), and so the INFJ is given favorable bias once again. Feeling is discussed in terms of outward display of emotion, when feeling is not emotion. The video hardly touches the surface of what Fi is, and doesn't do much justice to Fe either (it's not adjusting to others' moods - it's rational reasoning!!!!!!!).
 

Siúil a Rúin

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I didn't watch the video clip, but there are some descriptions of "inferior Se" that are pretty negative, including the possibility of unexpected indulgences when under stress. The classic example for an INFJ used is like a pastor who has an affair.

I find it quite difficult to distinguish between INFP and INFJ when looking at external behavior, partly because both are introverted, dreamers, able to create their own world, caring, distant, etc. The clearest internal cognitive difference I have noticed is that Ti and Fi tend towards precision of thought. Each concept is clearly defined like points on a web. I'm not certain about Si, but Ni-doms tend to think more in approximations with gradual clarification. I think that Si might tend more towards a type of precision, but perhaps it also has a somewhat statistical approach based on experience and concrete knowledge. I find Ni to have an approach similar to statistics, but more willing to encompass the extreme possibilities as well.

I know that Si and Ni doms are considered more decisive which I have trouble relating to, but that might be because of a tendency to focus on core concepts derived from indistinct, cloudlike masses of concepts. I think the Ti and Fi dom have a different sort of indecision and decisiveness, because it has more to do with navigating the web of ideas and finding the exactly right spot. Each spot is clearly defined, so it can take a while to figure out which specific configurations of concepts fits with a new idea. Does any of this make sense?
 

OrangeAppled

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The clearest internal cognitive difference I have noticed is that Ti and Fi tend towards precision of thought. Each concept is clearly defined like points on a web. I'm not certain about Si, but Ni-doms tend to think more in approximations with gradual clarification. I think that Si might tend more towards a type of precision, but perhaps it also has a somewhat statistical approach based on experience and concrete knowledge. I find Ni to have an approach similar to statistics, but more willing to encompass the extreme possibilities as well.

Yes, this hits on a significant point. Fi is like Ti in seeking an inner consistency. I frequently will point out such inconsistencies (in a an inferior Te, irritated manner). Ni is perceiving - it's vision. Si is also impressionistic - it is not arranging its sensing data internally. That is why they are often spoken of "reviewing" it. The arrangement is Je, and that is focused on outward application with structured approaches.

The video notes that about Ni, then it goes on to apply that precision of thought to the INFJ also! The INFP is the one who should have precision of thought applied to them, as that's a matter of Ji, not just Ti. The reason this is not done is because of the poor grasp of what Feeling is, and a likely inability to understand that Fi (and Fe) operates "according to the laws of reason" (Jung) and seeks harmony between its valuations - this is a consistency, one Jung argues is even logical. Dario Nardi notes Fi-dom are precise speakers, and Van Der Hoop notes Fi-dom are very careful with word choices when composing their feelings in written form. Fe is not explained well in the video either for similar reasons, and I think the guy focuses on emotional expression because it's likely how he experiences Feeling. Dario Nardi notes that Fe-dom are often the LEAST emotional when expressing valuations, even when using language that is laden with emotional phrasing. This is also consistent with what Jung & Van Der Hoop say about Fe-dom sometimes expressing a feeling but not appearing to be experiencing the associated emotion authentically, and how this differences strikes others as being manipulative (my paraphrasing there). The point here being that valuation is not an emotional process for them as it is with people who have inferior Feeling. Defining it based on their emotional responses is a poor angle to take.
 

Ene

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Haha...when I read these last few posts I thought, "INFJs are prone to jump out of airplanes when they are stressed. INFPs are prone to make others want to jump out of an airplane when they are stressed." I'm not claiming it's a fact, just saying it was a thought. Then I thought, "Well, really, under stress, INFJs do things they may later regret and INFPs say things they may later regret." I may be wrong; but I'm just saying that reading this post made me think that. You know inferior Se=doing. Inferior Te=extroverted thought process.
 

Ene

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The reason this is not done is because of the poor grasp of what Feeling is, and a likely inability to understand that Fi (and Fe) operates "according to the laws of reason" (Jung) and seeks harmony between its valuations - this is a consistency, one Jung argues is even logical. Dario Nardi notes Fi-dom are precise speakers, and Van Der Hoop notes Fi-dom are very careful with word choices when composing their feelings in written form. Fe is not explained well in the video either for similar reasons, and I think the guy focuses on emotional expression because it's likely how he experiences Feeling. Dario Nardi notes that Fe-dom are often the LEAST emotional when expressing valuations, even when using language that is laden with emotional phrasing. This is also consistent with what Jung & Van Der Hoop say about Fe-dom sometimes expressing a feeling but not appearing to be experiencing the associated emotion authentically, and how this differences strikes others as being manipulative (my paraphrasing there). The point here being that valuation is not an emotional process for them as it is with people who have inferior Feeling. Defining it based on their emotional responses is a poor angle to take.

Actually, I this is very good and it's pretty much right on. Nice job.
 

Ene

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The reason this is not done is because of the poor grasp of what Feeling is, and a likely inability to understand that Fi (and Fe) operates "according to the laws of reason" (Jung) and seeks harmony between its valuations - this is a consistency, one Jung argues is even logical. Dario Nardi notes Fi-dom are precise speakers, and Van Der Hoop notes Fi-dom are very careful with word choices when composing their feelings in written form. Fe is not explained well in the video either for similar reasons, and I think the guy focuses on emotional expression because it's likely how he experiences Feeling. Dario Nardi notes that Fe-dom are often the LEAST emotional when expressing valuations, even when using language that is laden with emotional phrasing. This is also consistent with what Jung & Van Der Hoop say about Fe-dom sometimes expressing a feeling but not appearing to be experiencing the associated emotion authentically, and how this differences strikes others as being manipulative (my paraphrasing there). The point here being that valuation is not an emotional process for them as it is with people who have inferior Feeling. Defining it based on their emotional responses is a poor angle to take.

Actually, I this is very good and it's pretty much right on. Nice job.
 

Doctor Cringelord

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Aw hell I don't even know anymore. I took it and scored INTP just now. :huh:

:shrug:

I always felt a certain kinship with "rational" types. I seem to get along with them well. And although I'm very much an idealist inside, I often find those types to be too hippy-dippy for my tastes.

The human psyche is too complex to be ordered into any one set type. These sorts of tests are fun for me, and I enjoy the discussions on this forum, but i think I need to come to terms with the fact that my brain and mind are too complex and multifaceted to fit into one concrete type. I think this is probably true for many people, if not everyone...
 

Doctor Cringelord

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I told my wife and she thinks I lean more INTP.

then I watched this

 

Siúil a Rúin

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...
I've also yet to meet an INFP who - as a part of their character - plans in details, is committed to structure/security, or follows instructions (I can personally struggle with all of those). That is Si in an SJ. Tertiary Si is more impressionistic, perhaps even sentimental. It's more about using past, sensory experiences as pieces of a collage for an idealized reality. It's also heavy on information gathering - acquainting oneself with reality through facts to store & mull over. I'm not surprised the grasp of Si & Fi is poor in that video. It has the distinct flavor of someone in love with iNtuition & who is likely a Fe user (perhaps the speaker is an ENTP...hmmm....), and so the INFJ is given favorable bias once again. Feeling is discussed in terms of outward display of emotion, when feeling is not emotion. The video hardly touches the surface of what Fi is, and doesn't do much justice to Fe either (it's not adjusting to others' moods - it's rational reasoning!!!!!!!).
I'm glad that you make this case on the forums, because it needs to be heard. I've been fortunate to have extended discussions about philosophy, ethics, and aesthetics with my Fi-dom sister. I can see the deep integrity and coherency of thought which I think could arguably go beyond the coherency of thought for even Ti-doms. I think rigorous, objective rationalism requires a greater degree of compartmentalization because it is not applicable in certain contexts.

I will say, though, that for whatever reason, I also have an intense drive for coherency in thought, but it is explored differently from my sister's. She has more opinions that I do that are all interconnected like the weaving of intricate lace. Each conclusion makes sense in the context of the over-arching framework. There is possibly zero hypocrisy of thought in her internal system. She does have strong feelings about her opinions, but that is because they are holistic, integrating every aspect of thinking and experiencing. Her framework is harder to construct than mine, but easier to evolve into a new system. Mine is more flexible in the moment, but is based on core foundations, so it is overwhelming to reconstruct. I'm really obsessed with questioning assumptions because getting those wrong throws off the entire system. I have been willing to reconstruct my entire system of thinking in my quest for coherency, so I think that drive can exist within any type possibly.
 

Doctor Cringelord

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Yesterday I spent a great deal of time researching the differences between INTPs and INFPs. I'm not completely prepared to rule out INTP as my type, but I am leaning back toward NF. I just think I'm far too sensitive to be a Ti dominant personality, although my sensitivity is not outwardly obvious to most people. That's also not to say INTPs aren't capable of being bruised or having their feelings hurt -- it seems to be a fairly common misconception that all INTPs are cold Vulcan types with few feelings to hurt. I'd venture that they are may bruise as easily as INFPs, it's just how and where you "get to them" is different.

Back to the INFP vs INFJ debate: I'm finding this site to be a useful resource. I'm sure you've all already seen it but it's probably the best sit I've yet found in helping me distinguish the two types. Particularly interesting is the section on communication styles of the two types.

Directing vs. Informing.

Directing comes more naturally to INTJs, Informing more naturally to INFPs. (Not to say both types aren't capable of of both styles.)

example of directing: "Please get us some milk."

example of informing: "We're out of milk."

I tend to use the informing style more, which would suggest INFP. Where this gets confusing, however, is determining if someone is using one of the styles more because they are naturally prone to it, or because they've learned and made a concerted effort to use one style over the other. At work, for instance, I tend to "inform" if I am asking a coworker or someone "under" me to do something, yet I am far more likely to "direct" if I am asking a supervisor for something. So I'm having difficulty determining which style comes more naturally to me. Cultural upbringing can also play a role, as people from the Southern United States (like myself) tend to be more conditioned to use the informing style, as it is perceived to be more polite, whereas someone from New York City may be more conditioned to direct.

What I feel is that when I "inform" people to do something at work, it often feels more forced. I feel I have to work up to asking them to do something so as not to seem bossy. Perhaps when I "direct" supervisors to do something for me, it's more natural, since I believe they are there to serve the needs of their "underlings." More of a sidenote: does the fact that I tend to view managers and supervisors more as equals than as superiors already give me away as an INFP?

It's not that I think one can easily peg one as an INFP or INFJ based solely on their communication styes, but could I be an INFJ who has been conditioned to force myself to use a communication style that is less natural to me for the sake of being more polite? Does my concern for others' feelings over my own suggest INFJ (not that INFPs are less concerned with others' feelings than their own)?

I wonder how many INFPs use a directing style more, particularly when in a position of authority, to seem less passive; likewise, I wonder how many INFJs in positions of authority have made a point of informing more so as to not seem bossy or overbearing.
 

Ene

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Yesterday I spent a great deal of time researching the differences between INTPs and INFPs. I'm not completely prepared to rule out INTP as my type, but I am leaning back toward NF. I just think I'm far too sensitive to be a Ti dominant personality, although my sensitivity is not outwardly obvious to most people. That's also not to say INTPs aren't capable of being bruised or having their feelings hurt -- it seems to be a fairly common misconception that all INTPs are cold Vulcan types with few feelings to hurt. I'd venture that they are may bruise as easily as INFPs, it's just how and where you "get to them" is different.

Back to the INFP vs INFJ debate: I'm finding this site to be a useful resource. I'm sure you've all already seen it but it's probably the best sit I've yet found in helping me distinguish the two types. Particularly interesting is the section on communication styles of the two types.

Directing vs. Informing.

Directing comes more naturally to INTJs, Informing more naturally to INFPs. (Not to say both types aren't capable of of both styles.)

example of directing: "Please get us some milk."

example of informing: "We're out of milk."

I tend to use the informing style more, which would suggest INFP. Where this gets confusing, however, is determining if someone is using one of the styles more because they are naturally prone to it, or because they've learned and made a concerted effort to use one style over the other. At work, for instance, I tend to "inform" if I am asking a coworker or someone "under" me to do something, yet I am far more likely to "direct" if I am asking a supervisor for something. So I'm having difficulty determining which style comes more naturally to me. Cultural upbringing can also play a role, as people from the Southern United States (like myself) tend to be more conditioned to use the informing style, as it is perceived to be more polite, whereas someone from New York City may be more conditioned to direct.

What I feel is that when I "inform" people to do something at work, it often feels more forced. I feel I have to work up to asking them to do something so as not to seem bossy. Perhaps when I "direct" supervisors to do something for me, it's more natural, since I believe they are there to serve the needs of their "underlings." More of a sidenote: does the fact that I tend to view managers and supervisors more as equals than as superiors already give me away as an INFP?

It's not that I think one can easily peg one as an INFP or INFJ based solely on their communication styes, but could I be an INFJ who has been conditioned to force myself to use a communication style that is less natural to me for the sake of being more polite? Does my concern for others' feelings over my own suggest INFJ (not that INFPs are less concerned with others' feelings than their own)?

I wonder how many INFPs use a directing style more, particularly when in a position of authority, to seem less passive; likewise, I wonder how many INFJs in positions of authority have made a point of informing more so as to not seem bossy or overbearing.

Actually, I think communication style may be a very valid indicator. Like you, I'm from the south, but I almost always use the directing style. I have four close INFP friends [none of them like or hang out with each other, but they all like me] and ALL of them use the informative style most often.
 

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What I feel is that when I "inform" people to do something at work, it often feels more forced. I feel I have to work up to asking them to do something so as not to seem bossy. Perhaps when I "direct" supervisors to do something for me, it's more natural, since I believe they are there to serve the needs of their "underlings."

I'm sorry that I don't have much to add in terms of your type, but I just wanted to say that I like this perspective and plan to attempt to look through it more often.

As a 6 I have a lot of feelings and conflict about authority, and I think this perspective would help ease the typical power imbalance. I tend to be anxious about authorities, because me retaining my job depends to a certain extent on their opinion of me. Two coworkers I have, a 1w2 and a 9w1, seem to have perspectives more like yours, that supervisors are there to help you do your job. They are ESTJ and ENFP, both self-identified, for the record.
 

Doctor Cringelord

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Her website has been very helpful. She's an INFJ and admits therefore to having a bit of bias, but she seems to know her stuff, as opposed to every other youtuber typologist that will offer half fact and half wild conjecture.
 

Siúil a Rúin

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My personal impression of INFs is that you have to be careful about judging and categorizing them based on external behaviors. Perhaps this goes for all types. I do know that INFs can be very inward and complex. In my mind I like to focus on the inward processing for evaluating personality type. I think externally most anyone would consider me an INFP these days, except that I have an organizational streak in me. I have also wrestled over figuring out which type I am. I think that MBTI has identified some core aspects of personality, but I don't take a rigid approach with function order or genetically wired types based on its 16. That is a bit low-res. I probably am a Ni-dom, but I feel like my inner world is driven by Ni, but organizes information with a combination of Ti and Fi depending on the type of data involved. Externally Se is weak, but I do feel like it pours into me. I more feel a combination of Ne and Fe. The only two functions that feel alien to me are Si and Te.

If a person has a really strong dominant function, I think there could be ways it pairs with its equivalent. For me I feel Ni so strongly that it reflects into Ne. I've seen Ti-doms who are so strong that their thinking spills over into Te. I think someone like Joan Baez who is typed as a Fi-dom (and her facial cues do strongly resonate with this), is so strong that she spills over into Fe. I've known some Ni-doms that spill over into Si as another type of close pairing. Also, there are Ti-doms that spill over into Fi because of their stronger need for a holistic, yet still logical reasoning. I would love to see many more shades of MBTI than just the 16. I think it would clear up a great deal of confusion and feelings or rigidity in trying to force people into categories.
 

Siúil a Rúin

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My personal impression of INFs is that you have to be careful about judging and categorizing them based on external behaviors. Perhaps this goes for all types. I do know that INFs can be very inward and complex. In my mind I like to focus on the inward processing for evaluating personality type. I think externally most anyone would consider me an INFP these days, except that I have an organizational streak in me. I have also wrestled over figuring out which type I am. I think that MBTI has identified some core aspects of personality, but I don't take a rigid approach with function order or genetically wired types based on its 16. That is a bit low-res. I probably am a Ni-dom, but I feel like my inner world is driven by Ni, but organizes information with a combination of Ti and Fi depending on the type of data involved. Externally Se is weak, but I do feel like it pours into me. I more feel a combination of Ne and Fe. The only two functions that feel alien to me are Si and Te.

If a person has a really strong dominant function, I think there could be ways it pairs with its equivalent. For me I feel Ni so strongly that it reflects into Ne. I've seen Ti-doms who are so strong that their thinking spills over into Te. I think someone like Joan Baez who is typed as a Fi-dom (and her facial cues do strongly resonate with this), is so strong that she spills over into Fe. I've known some Ni-doms that spill over into Si as another type of close pairing. Also, there are Ti-doms that spill over into Fi because of their stronger need for a holistic, yet still logical reasoning. I would love to see many more shades of MBTI than just the 16. I think it would clear up a great deal of confusion and feelings or rigidity in trying to force people into categories.

I think if I had to declare a different type, I would probably be an ENFP who is withdrawn. I have found that socially I identify strongly with both ENFPs and INFJs, and sometimes INFPs. I kind of think that the functions are like shape/color elements in a kaleidoscope.
 
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