[ENFJ] ENFJs (and INFJs)

[Ene]

Do INFJs have a sense of humor?

Do rabbits have tongues?

Also, an INFJ that has no energy...needs to take some vitamins if you ask me.

Seriously now, one of my sisters is an ENFJ and the main difference between us is that she talks more and louder. I think it. She says it. Whatever goes through her brain comes out her mouth and she's so convincing that most people agree with her, even if they disagree. I tease her and tell her that she is Oprah.

 

[zago]

Do rabbits have tongues?

I have a pet rabbit. Her name is Cody.
When I massage her butt she licks me.

 

[Ene]

LOL...then you know the answer.

 

[Typh0n]

Im an INFJ/ENFJ depending on perspective. I gotta say that all of this is rather relative, Im considered weird by most(if not by all), but its all relative to maybe INFJs being even weirder?

All in all I dont know what the difference is, Im actually wondering about it myself.

 

[LittleV]

Im an INFJ/ENFJ depending on perspective. I gotta say that all of this is rather relative, Im considered weird by most(if not by all), but its all relative to maybe INFJs being even weirder?

All in all I dont know what the difference is, Im actually wondering about it myself.

I recall you said that you had no problem with popularity at one point in you life. If you decided to give the reign to someone else, say, a close friend, because it was not what you were after, then you might be an INFJ. If you appreciated the support but felt like the attention was distracting you from things that really mattered, that could be another sign. If you could morph into an 'SP artisan' because you'd feel as though 'it were a part of you' - that could be yet another one. If you think in puzzles that consist of obscure symbols that are invariably developing in meaning... and utilize those to navigate even the technical fields (e.g. math and science), and find that not a lot of people understand you outside of Ni, and occasionally, Ti-users... welcome to the world of human semantics/systems!

 

[Siúil a Rúin]

Do rabbits have tongues?

Also, an INFJ that has no energy...needs to take some vitamins if you ask me.

*goes to take vitamins*

 

[Ene]

*goes to take vitamins*

LOL. The chewy kid kind are the best

 

[Siúil a Rúin]

LOL. The chewy kid kind are the best

We are fully stocked with every variety of gummy vites.

 

[Glycerine]

When I am not being an anxious nutcase, I say whatever tends to come to mind and feed off the energy of the room. If I am happy/excited/playful, I become more animated/loud and talk a lot. My face supposedly lights up. When I am sad/contemplative/serious (neutral)/distracted, my affect is rather flat and my voice is soft and quiet.

INFJs usually seem more stoic and contained.

 

[Typh0n]

I recall you said that you had no problem with popularity at one point in you life. If you decided to give the reign to someone else, say, a close friend, because it was not what you were after, then you might be an INFJ. If you appreciated the support but felt like the attention was distracting you from things that really mattered, that could be another sign. If you could morph into an 'SP artisan' because you'd feel as though 'it were a part of you' - that could be yet another one. If you think in puzzles that consist of obscure symbols that are invariably developing in meaning... and utilize those to navigate even the technical fields (e.g. math and science), and find that not a lot of people understand you outside of Ni, and occasionally, Ti-users... welcome to the world of human semantics/systems!

Yeah, I did say that and it was true. I didnt want to give the reign over to someone else when it comes to popularity. I dont mind my friends being popular either, Im not jealous or anything, but I didnt think that it was distracting me. I wouldnt say that my being popular wasnt due to conformity, it was, but I was conforming to something I could, I tried conforming to most of society's norms but I cant. I was conforming more to a counter culture when I was popular, which doesnt change the fact that I was. Then I moved, away from the people I was popular around to place where there is no real counter culure. And I am forever alone. Dont ENFJ morph into SPs as well? And on the last thing, I dont know. I've never used symbols to navigate through the world of math and science, but who knows maybe I have hidden potential.

 

[Siúil a Rúin]

[MENTION=17656]hazelsees[/MENTION], do you ever watch "Parks and Recreation"? I think Leslie Knope is an extreme ENFJ in terms of high energy levels, being thorough and driven, caring about community, and still being a bit spacey and in her own world.

 

[LittleV]

Yeah, I did say that and it was true. I didnt want to give the reign over to someone else when it comes to popularity. I dont mind my friends being popular either, Im not jealous or anything, but I didnt think that it was distracting me.

That sounds about right… xNFJ’s are usually very caring toward their friends. However, all conditions are different, and not all xNFJ’s would reach discernible popularity… but most would worry about other, more important things anyway. The point is… INFJ’s tend to take care of things behind the scenes, but could look very extravagantly entertaining on the surface (they wouldn’t wish to be appear either inauspicious or threatening).

I wouldnt say that my being popular wasnt due to conformity, it was, but I was conforming to something I could, I tried conforming to most of society's norms but I cant. I was conforming more to a counter culture when I was popular, which doesnt change the fact that I was. Then I moved, away from the people I was popular around to place where there is no real counter culure. And I am forever alone.

I have a friend who is extremely popular in his counterculture. He is essentially worshiped on his facebook wall, haha. I used to think that he was an INFP because we were very similar aside from his disoganization… and he gave off the ‘Johnny Depp’ vibe – but then I realized he was merely an evolved ESTP whom I did tell that I liked JD to. After coming here to the boards, I’ve witnessed how different INFP’s and INFJ’s are… as well as each INFJ. In any case, he moved to attend a Ph.D program which happened to be at my school, and he hated it. He felt lonely, isolated… was constantly on facebook, etc. It is not as though grad school would typically allow (for much time) for a real social life… but he was miserable. He has a really cute and chubby cat, though… which I’m sure eased the initial torment, haha. He’s fine now… and has made a lot of friends who would partake in his chosen counterculture. Furthermore, the extent to which you attempted to conform might be the better indicator. Yes, xNFJ’s can be very odd, but ENFJ’s are less likely to place their quirks/idiosyncrasies on display. They’d tend to have more solid/consistent manners of communication in their social circles.

Dont ENFJ morph into SPs as well?

Yes, but personally, I’d say that ENFJ’s would often hold onto their Fe, which would make them regularly stay in-tune with the emotional atmosphere. When INFJ’s morph… it’s typically an all-or-nothing deal. An Ni-dom growing up could have random spurts of Se; the more stressed out they’d be, the more sturdy/tough they’d get. I was athletic when I had to be… and I’d run outside and get scrapes and bruises all the time. I suppose my dad putting me in self-defense classes helped, haha… but it was all about Bruce Lee, Jackie Chan, math, science, philosophy and music in our house (to my liking; my ESTJ sister dismissed all of that, but she does enjoy poetry).

And on the last thing, I dont know. I've never used symbols to navigate through the world of math and science, but who knows maybe I have hidden potential.

I’d find that miscellaneous symbolic embodiments could correlate depending on the perspective/observed angle… and could be transferred when carefully assessed; which indicates, to me, that seemingly disparate fields could be merged. It also makes it much easier for me to switch back and forth. I was always more of a math/science gal though; I had to force myself to write more (publish or perish!). I am sure you have hidden potential; it simply takes tenacious exertion to unlock it…

 

[Typh0n]

That sounds about right… xNFJ’s are usually very caring toward their friends. However, all conditions are different, and not all xNFJ’s would reach discernible popularity… but most would worry about other, more important things anyway. The point is… INFJ’s tend to take care of things behind the scenes, but could look very extravagantly entertaining on the surface (they wouldn’t wish to be appear either inauspicious or threatening).

Yeah, I always preffered and felt more adapted to a "spotlight" role than a "behind the scenes" one. I guess that is indicative of extroversion.

I have a friend who is extremely popular in his counterculture. He is essentially worshiped on his facebook wall, haha. I used to think that he was an INFP because we were very similar aside from his disoganization… and he gave off the ‘Johnny Depp’ vibe – but then I realized he was merely an evolved ESTP whom I did tell that I liked JD to. After coming here to the boards, I’ve witnessed how different INFP’s and INFJ’s are… as well as each INFJ. In any case, he moved to attend a Ph.D program which happened to be at my school, and he hated it. He felt lonely, isolated… was constantly on facebook, etc. It is not as though grad school would typically allow (for much time) for a real social life… but he was miserable. He has a really cute and chubby cat, though… which I’m sure eased the initial torment, haha. He’s fine now… and has made a lot of friends who would partake in his chosen counterculture.

Yeah...Im not as isolated as I was some years ago...but its very hard to make friends where I live.
People aerent very open out here, I find. Maybe Im just too negative towards them, and its my current attitude that gets in the way of me making new freinds. I dont know. Your friend sounds like he might have had the same problem as I; in a more "conventional" cultural context, he wasnt at home socially-speaking.

Furthermore, the extent to which you attempted to conform might be the better indicator. Yes, xNFJ’s can be very odd, but ENFJ’s are less likely to place their quirks/idiosyncrasies on display. They’d tend to have more solid/consistent manners of communication in their social circles.

Yeah, I appear very normal when in the company of strangers, but friends see a different side.

I’d find that miscellaneous symbolic embodiments could correlate depending on the perspective/observed angle… and could be transferred when carefully assessed; which indicates, to me, that seemingly disparate fields could be merged. It also makes it much easier for me to switch back and forth. I was always more of a math/science gal though; I had to force myself to write more (publish or perish!). I am sure you have hidden potential; it simply takes tenacious exertion to unlock it…

Thanks, and yeah Im kinda into abstract concepts and symbolism, but I also like imagery alot too so Im not a person obsessed with symbols or their intereconnectivity.

 

[LittleV]

Yeah...Im not as isolated as I was some years ago...but its very hard to make friends where I live.

Maybe you need a cute and chubby cat… <-- I couldn't decide whether to leave this here since it's not very pleasing to the eye, so I guess I'll just leave it…

 

[Typh0n]

Maybe you need a cute and chubby cat… <-- I couldn't decide whether to leave this here since it's not very pleasing to the eye, so I guess I'll just leave it…

Lol, I have three cats. And I dig that emote.

 

[LittleV]

Lol, I have three cats. And I dig that emote.

Haha, awesome.

 

[Honor]

The difference is that ENFJs' extroversion propels them to want to be waaay more involved in others' lives. INFJs are way more live and let live than ENFJs in my experience. Although INFJs may make mental notes about how other people should change their behavior or develop, its the ENFJs who reach out and try to get people to change or develop or get along. Something like that.

 

[hazelsees]

[MENTION=17656]hazelsees[/MENTION], do you ever watch "Parks and Recreation"? I think Leslie Knope is an extreme ENFJ in terms of high energy levels, being thorough and driven, caring about community, and still being a bit spacey and in her own world.

Hi fia. I don't watch Parks and Recreation. Maybe I should.
My new co-worker doesn't seem all that energetic and dynamic, but that could be because he's the new guy. And he arrived the Monday after his office (along with mine) was destroyed by a storm. And he is living with a friend because his house in another state hasn't sold yet and he can't buy another one until he sells that one. He and I are working out of the conference room while our offices are being put back together--so maybe he is a little stressed. And he'll ENGERGIZE once things are a bit more settled.
This INFJ doesn't do super well with being displaced--inwardly at least. Outwardly I'm very positive and cheerful...well, until the other day when someone pushed my laptop and stuff down the conference table. It made me so mad. I have this one little spot at the conference table, and people can't leave my stuff alone. I don't have an office. I don't know where my desk is. I don't know where my files are, just give me this one little spot to call my own (for now). At that point, I searched for and found the name plate that was hanging on my office door and taped it to that spot on the conference table. Ha!
So...how do ENFJs do with chaos and being displaced and such?

 

[sculpting]

The difference is that ENFJs' extroversion propels them to want to be waaay more involved in others' lives. INFJs are way more live and let live than ENFJs in my experience. Although INFJs may make mental notes about how other people should change their behavior or develop, its the ENFJs who reach out and try to get people to change or develop or get along. Something like that.

^^from the enfp perspective, this is what I note. I have had many INFJ friends over the years and they are always very accepting of me and esoteric and unique in thier own way...so we have a live and let live interaction with one another. I suspect we may at different times think about advice for each other, but there is no real desire to value push on one another. Perhaps because we are both live and let live, and appreciate being able to be ourselves and accepted, we are hesitant to disturb that equiplibrium by offerring unsolicited advice to each other, and instead just equilibrate and enjoy the relationship?? I dunno. When they do make requests, they tend to come across as emotionally restrained and a bit logical, so we can go back and forth a bit and work together fairly well.

ENFJs push really hard in ways that I dont understand how to react to, and say things I dont understand how to respond to, so I tend to be a bit like the bullfighters cape and step out of thier way and then resume what I was doing once they are gone. Sort of a "hey, look over there at that more important thing" so they dont spend too much time looking at me and impacting the work I am trying to finish. The aim is diversion, distraction and invisibility at the same time. I must assume they sense this given how astute they are, but it does seem to keep them from zeroing in on me as an object to be changed. The funny thing is that looking back on my interactions with ENFJs, if the ENFJ would give me explicit direction, I'd actually take it, but I couldnt always understand thier more indirect guidance, so then I just figure they didnt actually want anything after all and it was a momentary emotional request and then just ignore whatever they said.

 

[Honor]

^^from the enfp perspective, this is what I note. I have had many INFJ friends over the years and they are always very accepting of me and esoteric and unique in thier own way...so we have a live and let live interaction with one another. I suspect we may at different times think about advice for each other, but there is no real desire to value push on one another. Perhaps because we are both live and let live, and appreciate being able to be ourselves and accepted, we are hesitant to disturb that equiplibrium by offerring unsolicited advice to each other, and instead just equilibrate and enjoy the relationship?? I dunno. When they do make requests, they tend to come across as emotionally restrained and a bit logical, so we can go back and forth a bit and work together fairly well.

ENFJs push really hard in ways that I dont understand how to react to, and say things I dont understand how to respond to, so I tend to be a bit like the bullfighters cape and step out of thier way and then resume what I was doing once they are gone. Sort of a "hey, look over there at that more important thing" so they dont spend too much time looking at me and impacting the work I am trying to finish. The aim is diversion, distraction and invisibility at the same time. I must assume they sense this given how astute they are, but it does seem to keep them from zeroing in on me as an object to be changed. The funny thing is that looking back on my interactions with ENFJs, if the ENFJ would give me explicit direction, I'd actually take it, but I couldnt always understand thier more indirect guidance, so then I just figure they didnt actually want anything after all and it was a momentary emotional request and then just ignore whatever they said.

Yup. I think that interaction between ENFPs and INFJs tends to be better and that interaction between ENFJs and INFPs tends to be better ... which is exactly as Socionics predicts. I'm not 100% sure that I'm ENFJ, but it's a possibility for my type, and I'm not a very live and let live person myself. I tend to clash a lot with ENFPs, and INFJs too somewhat...but there's less clashing there.