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[ENFP] ENFPs, why won't you let me into your pants?

Amargith

Hotel California
Joined
Nov 5, 2008
Messages
14,717
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
4dw
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
Interactions on a Ne level get boring quickly. Perhaps I should try to bed them before that point next time.


:kick me:

:doh:

There is more to Ne than banter and silly games, you silly silly boy :smooch:

Fine, lemme spell it out then. Instead of tearing them a new one for presenting you with a half-assed hypothesis when they discuss something with you, recognize it for the draft that it is, appreciate the fact that they wnat your input on it, and use that Ne of yours together with your Ti to fill the gaps and 'construct' something together, editing the first draft, plugging the holes and actually work together as a team. We dont present full hypotheses, we present ideas. Therefore they will *NEVER* be up to the standard you would be using before presenting your own personal hypotheses. This is also what you *like* about us...that we are spontaneous and bubbly and toss out the weirdest shit first :alttongue:

So don't punish us for it. Restrain that inner critic of yours and appreciate the invite to work on the project at brainstorming level, bouncing ideas off of each other. And yes..value that Fi input, if you can. We try to do the same with your foreign feeling Ti. I know Fi looks really like its build on air castles, but it most certainly has value and its own logic. So suspend your logical naysaying and watch it work its magic :wink:
 

Rasofy

royal member
Joined
Mar 7, 2011
Messages
5,881
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INTP
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5w6
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:doh:

There is more to Ne than banter and silly games, you silly silly boy :smooch:

Fine, lemme spell it out then. Instead of tearing them a new one for presenting you with a half-assed hypothesis when they discuss something with you, recognize it for the draft that it is, appreciate the fact that they wnat your input on it, and use that Ne of yours together with your Ti to fill the gaps and 'construct' something together, editing the first draft, plugging the holes and actually work together as a team. We dont present full hypotheses, we present ideas. Therefore they will *NEVER* be up to the standard you would be using before presenting your own personal hypotheses. This is also what you *like* about us...that we are spontaneous and bubbly and toss out the weirdest shit first :alttongue:

So don't punish us for it. Restrain that inner critic of yours and appreciate the invite to work on the project at brainstorming level, bouncing ideas off of each other. And yes..value that Fi input, if you can. We try to do the same with your foreign feeling Ti. I know Fi looks really like its build on air castles, but it most certainly has value and its own logic. So suspend your logical naysaying and watch it work its magic :wink:
I love your ability to make anything sound cute. :wubbie:

I'll keep that in mind. :)
 

Starry

Active member
Joined
May 22, 2010
Messages
6,103
Perhaps they do feel threatened. The last one did I think. But not all ENFPs are alike. 7 wing ENFPs seem almost ESFP. They're not very attracted to intelligence. I've met many ENFPs but few were capable of analytical thought like INTPs.

*heavy sigh* Please tell me some ENFP has already come through this thread and cleared some 'stuff' up...

EDIT: Okay...........................................................................................................................................................................................................so I see not. Now I just need to see if I care to come back and do it. wtf.
[MENTION=6285]professor goodstain[/MENTION] ?
 

OrangeAppled

Sugar Hiccup
Joined
Mar 20, 2009
Messages
7,626
MBTI Type
INFP
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4w5
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sp/sx
Most INTPs I know treat ExFPs like airheads. Even if they like them, it's more like "you're a cute & entertaining airhead". Perhaps not true for the OP, but just my observation IRL. ENFPs generally don't like that treatment, and ESFPs only tolerate it if they think it gives them an edge (my ESFP sis says she likes to be "underestimated" as a kind of advantage over people).

I knew an ENFP who was obsessed with this mutual INTP friend of ours. He pretended not to like her when he kinda did, and most of his contemptuous attitude was towards her being kind of silly. Not in her humor, but just her general way. I think it amused him, but he was also annoyed at times by it. She pursued him relentlessly anyway, as infatuated ENFPs tend to do. Not sure how anyone could miss those signals...

Oh yeeeaaah, I like design & bright colors, and I'm totally down for a conversation on Kant. IDk why people think an interest in fashion or aesthetics means shallow or not intellectually inclined....
 

Typhus

New member
Joined
Apr 27, 2013
Messages
13
MBTI Type
INTP
Enneagram
5w4
I've been asking myself the same question. They seem somewhat allergic to Ti, I think. It can sound judgemental for those not used to it.

I think the last ENFP I dated briefly thought I was judgemental/controlling because I told her playfully that she had to do something to make up for flaking out on something she said she'd do. I said it playfully, but over text, so I think she thought I was being controlling. I scared another one away. :cry:

I'm not familiar with cognitive functions like Ti. Google tells me that Ti is not in the top four dominant traits of ENFP, so does it scare ENFPs?
 

digesthisickness

✿ڿڰۣஇღ♥ wut ♥ღஇڿڰۣ✿
Joined
Apr 24, 2007
Messages
3,248
MBTI Type
ENTP
Ha. I could just imagine her thoughts. "Insults me by implying I have to live up to his standards then insults me again by saying I have to pay for failing to do so. Like hell, Buddy. *delete*"

You don't get to play like that until you're sure you've got her, and even then, it's shaky ground if she has any doubts. Things like that can look like big danger signs for the future.
 

Azure Flame

Permabanned
Joined
Aug 26, 2010
Messages
2,317
MBTI Type
ESTP
Enneagram
8w7
Metaphorically speaking. :wink:

I'm INTP and I've felt the magnetic pull that only ENFPs seem to have over me. But I scare away most of them. I'm not mean or creepy so why do you run away? I'm just weird. Am I giving off some creepy vibes? I checked the mirror and I don't have an evil pulsating green boil that on my forehead.

ENFPs, how do your perceive INTPs? I'm outgoing and clownish for an INTP.

Funny, I can't get enfp's away from me fast enough. Probably because I ignore them. Since they're so dead set on being the center of attention, they do everything in their power to change that. They all seem to have the same exact pickup lines.

Me: Fuck you
ENFP: Please do!
 

Thalassa

Permabanned
Joined
May 3, 2009
Messages
25,183
MBTI Type
ISFP
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sx
I'm pleased to see a thread stereotyping a group of FPs rather than FJs as having sexual preferences or standards.
 

digesthisickness

✿ڿڰۣஇღ♥ wut ♥ღஇڿڰۣ✿
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ENTP
Yeah, if a buttload of other types of girls also aren't letting you in, it may not be a type thing. As in, it's not a type thing.
 

Typhus

New member
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Apr 27, 2013
Messages
13
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INTP
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5w4
No, I have SJ women after me. I don't get into relationships with them because I'm attracted almost exclusively to ENFP females.

I have male and female ENFx friends, but I wantz to :hug: an ENFP romantically.

And then take off their pants. :wink:
 

Rasofy

royal member
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Mar 7, 2011
Messages
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5w6
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I think the last ENFP I dated briefly thought I was judgemental/controlling because I told her playfully that she had to do something to make up for flaking out on something she said she'd do. I said it playfully, but over text, so I think she thought I was being controlling. I scared another one away. :cry:
:doh: Joke fail.

Sounded like you implied that she was supposed to put out to compensate.

I recall some similar fuck ups in past interactions with ENFPs. It's like they naturally bait me to say something insensitive. One once told me that she wanted to adopt a girl because she empathized with the situation of being abandoned by a parent. I said something like ":thinking: that's not gonna change the world much". :BangHead:

Another ENFP stopped replying to my messages right after I stopped talking about her for a small moment to talk about my career goals.

I'm not familiar with cognitive functions like Ti.
We tend to use some typology lingo here, but stick around and you'll eventually learn a lot.

Google tells me that Ti is not in the top four dominant traits of ENFP, so does it scare ENFPs?
Ime, yes. I'd suggest you to forget ENFPs and go for ENFJs instead - they'll more readily appreciate an impersonal feedback (INTP specialty) without freaking out. They are rarer online though.
 

Amargith

Hotel California
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Nov 5, 2008
Messages
14,717
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Funny, I can't get enfp's away from me fast enough. Probably because I ignore them. Since they're so dead set on being the center of attention, they do everything in their power to change that. They all seem to have the same exact pickup lines.

Me: Fuck you
ENFP: Please do!


:thinking: See, I'd do this just to playfully push your buttons. It sounds like you're an awesome target for that. :smile:

Granted, if you aint up for playing, I'll leave it alone.

Most INTPs I know treat ExFPs like airheads. Even if they like them, it's more like "you're a cute & entertaining airhead". Perhaps not true for the OP, but just my observation IRL. ENFPs generally don't like that treatment, and ESFPs only tolerate it if they think it gives them an edge (my ESFP sis says she likes to be "underestimated" as a kind of advantage over people).

Oh yeeeaaah, I like design & bright colors, and I'm totally down for a conversation on Kant. IDk why people think an interest in fashion or aesthetics means shallow or not intellectually inclined....

Yeah...nothing turns me off faster. There aint no way they go near my non-existing pants. I do enjoy yanking their chain though and using their perception of me against them, then see how smart they actually are in figuring it out. :devil:
 

Starry

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May 22, 2010
Messages
6,103
[MENTION=18292]Typhus[/MENTION] & [MENTION=13260]Rasofy[/MENTION]

I want to know what you are doing in order to ascertain these supposed ENFP females types? Like Rasofy, you describe a girl at the beginning of your blog as ENFP and there is nothing in that description that would lead me to believe that was an accurate assessment. From everything I've read I am in agreement with the general numbers - that we probably only make up a small percentage of the population. Not every *bubbly* (or flakey) girl you meet is going to be an ENFP...or ESFP for that matter. In fact, most of us are nothing like that at all. So tell me about your process here...
 

Starry

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Messages
6,103
Funny, I can't get enfp's away from me fast enough. Probably because I ignore them. Since they're so dead set on being the center of attention, they do everything in their power to change that. They all seem to have the same exact pickup lines.

Me: Fuck you
ENFP: Please do!

Right.
 

digesthisickness

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ENTP
Seriously, ENFPs are smart, dude. They can read you not only pretty accurately, but pretty quickly. Sure, they may be wrong sometimes, we all are, but they've been right enough times to have confidence in their readings. You come at them wearing pants-colored glasses and they're going to know it and be even more watchful for any signs that you aren't worth their time. I could say more which could possibly help you, but frankly? I don't want to as I'd hate to give someone ammunition they'd end up using as a front when they don't really feel what they're saying. You win one? You earn it.
 

violet_crown

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Nobody finds desperate attractive. You're probably giving off icky, needy vibes and scaring away the little ENFP birds.
 

digesthisickness

✿ڿڰۣஇღ♥ wut ♥ღஇڿڰۣ✿
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Nobody finds desperate attractive. You're probably giving off icky, needy vibes and scaring away the little ENFP birds.

Huh, he said SJs are "after him." And, if he's not interested in them, that could explain it. Meaning, with them, he wouldn't be so apt to give off such a vibe.
 

Rasofy

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Typhus & Rasofy

I want to know what you are doing in order to ascertain these supposed ENFP females types? Like Rasofy, you describe a girl at the beginning of your blog as ENFP and there is nothing in that description that would lead me to believe that was an accurate assessment. From everything I've read I am in agreement with the general numbers - that we probably only make up a small percentage of the population. Not every *bubbly* (or flakey) girl you meet is going to be an ENFP...or ESFP for that matter. In fact, most of us are nothing like that at all. So tell me about your process here...
I think I'm able to sense a high Fi usage fairly easily. It's like a peculiar accent that sounds odd and cute at the same time. Then it's about consciously making pattern associations and verifying which type fits best. It's not foolproof, but seems reliable enough.
 

violet_crown

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Huh, he said SJs are "after him." And, if he's not interested in them, that could explain it. Meaning, with them, he wouldn't be so apt to give off such a vibe.

What's your point? We're not talking about SJs right now. His vibe with them is irrelevant.
 

Amargith

Hotel California
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Nov 5, 2008
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What's your point? We're not talking about SJs right now. His vibe with them is irrelevant.

She means to say that with SJs he is probably confident instead of 'desperate', making him more attractive to him, in comparison with enfps. Though Im not sure that that is truly the case. But it is one scenario.
 
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